I'm new to the teen thing my oldest just turned 13

Jeanne - posted on 08/14/2009

Quoting Brandy:

I'm new to the teen thing my oldest just turned 13

Do any of you have any secrets on emotionaly calming yourself when your child becomes a teen? My daughter isn't wild or anything, it's just I don't know how to except the fact that she is growing up and becoming responsible for herself. How do you handle the fact that your child is growing up and you will soon just be able to give advice rather than say no. How do you protect your child from the world?

Karen - posted on 08/12/2009

As long as you know in your heart that you have given your child the right foundation for living, you can be safe in knowing that in the end she will come to you. My almost 15 year old and I have gone in circles the past three years. He is finally starting to come to me and actually talk. You just have to be patient and pray. You also have to let go. The tighter you hold on the more they will slip away. Give them independence in moderation and know who their friends are.

Tanya - posted on 08/10/2009

I'm such a dork, I was replying to Misti Scott's post. :0)

Tanya - posted on 08/10/2009

My only son is 3 and right now, i don't want him to leave me (in the future). I used to tease my brother's about being mama's boys and they used to get so mad at me. Now they're in their mid to late 20s and they're like, "So what?" I'm sure their g-friends hate it but until they marry, our mother is THE woman in their life. I want a close relationship w/ my son and I've started praying now that someday my son is going to meet an amazing woman that I will be happy to call my daughter. Your son may still be clinging to his childhood cuz they may be the safest, happiest period in his life. In todays society, our teenagers deal w/ a lot of crazy stuff and I'm thankful that my daughter (14) is still in that stage where she'll come to me for comfort and cuddles. I'm cherishing these moments cuz one day, she'll fully out grow them and will soon be making her own way in this world. Could be worse!

Angel (Jane) - posted on 08/10/2009

Mine is 16 and she is also a great girl never gave me problems but had fun three years trying to find hersefl and make the right choices. The most important thing I can tell you is dont assume she will make a bad choice and if she does walk her through not talk her through they hate to hear us go on an on and on. Lead her by example also.

Mary "Jeana" - posted on 08/05/2009

You can't protect them forever as much as we would like. However you give them as much advice as you can. I have a 14 year old son. He finds out alot of things from kids at school. I find it easier to be open with him about life. I'm still the parent, but we have a very open relationship. We talk about everything. He talks to me about stuff and not dad. That's just the kind of relationship we've developed. I don't get upset when he tells things that a mom shouldn't hear. I just listen and then we have a simple conversation about the subject. He gets to hear the adult conversation as to where he hears the teenage version from his friends at school. Good luck and just give yourself a timeout when you don't like what she's done or says. It's better to take a break from it and then go back and talk about the problem or situation. Always tell them there are consequences for their actions. Tell her what they might be. Good luck. Jeana

Tammy - posted on 08/05/2009

If you've given your child a good foundation, don't worry. You've been working at it for 13 years and now comes the test. You can never protect your child from everything (even at a young age). Go with the flow. I have 2 grown children who live elsewhere and 2 teens still at home so as you can see, I have some experience.. You can do it. 13 isn't the hard part. When they go out on their own is the toughest. Enjoy every bit of the teen years you have left with your children. Take nothing for granted. Enjoy watching her blossom into a young lady and sit back to watch your accomplishments. It's awesome!

Tanya - posted on 08/04/2009

talk to my daughter, 14, all the time about how she's doing and feeling. I also tell her I love her and how special she is to me. I have a good support system in my mom and a cousin I grew up w/. My daughter is great but she's had her moments where I wanted to strangle her. I'm very stingy w/ her and my other children. I have to meet all her friends and make note of who she talks to and about. I have to meet the parents of her friends that she's close to and I have to "inspect" the house of her friends that she may visit. I'm very upfront w;/ the other parents in terms of calling me if they have any concerns, etc. They're all supportive of it. We have family night every week, do things together as a family on the weekends and encourage "girl-talk" so I can keep abreast of what my daughter is going thru. I keep our talks honest, and encourage her participation so she doesn't feel like I'm condescending to her. I pray every night for my family, blessings, and give the Lord praise. I've done the best I could and the rest is up to God. Hope that helps and keep your chin up!

Misti - posted on 07/28/2009

My son turned 13 in June, and he tries to act his age sometimes, but mostly acts like he is 8. His teachers were hoping he would outgrow this by now but he hasnt. He is also my oldest so I am new to it also. I was always told its a live and learn experiance. All you can do is hang on...lol, and do your best.