I'm the legal gardain to my 13yr old grandson his behaviour swearing at me

Pamela - posted on 11/14/2012 ( 14 moms have responded )

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I'm bring up my 13y. Yr old grandson who swears at me and calls me. All sorts oF names f..ck off fat pig stupid old get he is making my life hell also he is always getting into to trouble at school I'm at the end of my tether can anyone advise me how to deal with him

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 11/14/2012

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Time for some tough love. Tell him exactly what you do for him. Make a list. Make sure that he knows that you have raised him so that he wouldn't be put into the "system", and that you love him, but you are not a doormat, and he is no longer allowed to treat you as such.



Get some family counseling. He's got some issues that he needs to work through, if he treats his grandparents like crap.



If he's physically threatening, or injuring you in any way, call the cops and have him taken in for elder abuse.



Don't stop loving him, and letting him know that you love him. However, it is definitely OK to tell him that you don't LIKE him when he's an asshole.



Best of luck, Pamela

Vickie - posted on 11/20/2012

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Explain to your grandson that the only things that you are required by law to provide him are food, shelter and clothes period. Take away all video games, cell phones, name brand clothes (leave him one outfit out each day), take the door off his room. Tell him he will get one item back per a certain period of time of being respectful, and you will take it back if need be. Don't yell, do it all matter of fact, and I would take it away while he's at school so he doesn't fight while you're doing it. Be prepared for him to get angry and throw a fit about it when it happens and calmly remind him that it's that kind of behavior that needs to stop. Now.

Suzette - posted on 11/18/2012

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*you deserve to have peace in your life and definitely in your own home! And if he wants to comply to your rules of conduct, send his lil peace breaking ass packing! It is a CRIME for a minor to disrespect his parent/guardian so let him do that mess in the State's juvenile facility.

Suzette - posted on 11/18/2012

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Youve tried the "right modern" things so go medival. Tell him the very next time he disrespects you in any way that you are going to beat his ass then turn custody over to the state then STICK TO IT! and whoop his ass and if that

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Elias - posted on 05/03/2014

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Is he getting that language from a certain place? If it's from TV or a video game, no TV or video games for a week. If it's from another student at school, call the school and tell them to suspend the student.

Mary - posted on 12/12/2013

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Do you have legal guardianship? If so you should be receiving some assistance to help you financially. Teenagers are tough regardless who they belong too. You could contact a boys boarding school that offers therapy/counseling. They have financial assistance to help cover the costs. It sounds like he needs some help in a structured environment that can identify his issues and help him resolve them. I have been looking in to it for my grandson just in case I need back up support. He is not old enough to attend right now but I let him know that there are other living arrangements I can consider if he gives me too much grief. He doesn't like the idea so hopefully he will think about not giving me a hard time or disrepecting me in the future. Children separated from theirs parents and being raised by someone else is not a normal lifestyle. This effects children deeply regardless of age. These events can deeply effect them emotionally, mentally, and physically. Has he been evaluated by a professional? Do you think there is something unusual about him? How does he act with others? My grandson developed PTSD Post Trauma Stress Disorder from being separated from his parents & brother. This causes inappropriate behaviour. I'm holding on to the boarding school that offers therapy for kids with troubled backgrounds. Do your research and check it out. There are some goods ones out there.

Ariana - posted on 11/23/2012

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I might go with what Vickie says along with some proper family councelling.

Terri - posted on 11/18/2012

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I so agree!! This children now a days fell like they deserve everthing handed to them in a sliver platter!!

Terri - posted on 11/18/2012

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I'm sorry to hear this. I am a grandmother who is raising my 14 year old grandson, who doesn't want to go to school. I thought it was insomia. Its anxiety about his looks whats to be perfect. His attitude is getting out of hand. Is your grandsons parents around? Is his father involved in his life? My grandson suffer abuse from his mother, and his father has been absent from his life. My daughter is married now and seems to be more stable. I ahte to have to have my grandson move back with his mom, but I think its time! Have you tried counseling and or medication? Has your grandson had trama in his life? I know its not easy, and I thank god I have my husband to help, but we are both exhausted. And I feel my grandson has parents so there isn't a need for me to have to raise him. I think in a wayhe takes advantage of us. I am taking his TV away from him if this monday he doesn't go to school. I will pray for you to have strength. Maybe your grandson needs a reality check by going to a all boys school or military school. Good luck and God bless you.

Tanya - posted on 11/16/2012

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Is there an officer on his school campus? If so, get him involved. Overprivledged kids who think they're entitled don't dis ppl in that position for very long. Get the counselor involved as well. Perhaps they could help, programs that would help you and your grandson. Right away, i would stop buying the things he wants and only what he needs and dedinitely no name brand stuff. Let him earn it. Teenage yrs are hell. Good luck and stay strong!

Pamela - posted on 11/14/2012

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Thanks for your reply but I've tried everything grounding him taking computer away Xbox away he is really bad I'm at the end of my tether I've brought him up since he was born my daughter couldn't bring him. Up I've. Given him every thing he needed and wanted but am at a loss to the way he treats me and his grandad Will he get worse he demands money of us and is never satisfied

Ariana - posted on 11/14/2012

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Does he have a councellor? I would go to some family councelling to work on this behavior.



I would also send him to his room whenever he swears at you, or walk away telling him you don't listen to people who talk to you like that. I would also give him a consequence for talking to you like that, so he loses his computer privilages for the next two days, or tv/gaming/going out/cell phone etc.

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