My 15-Year-Old Daughter wants to go on the Pill

Janice - posted on 11/29/2010 ( 94 moms have responded )

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My 15 Year old daughter has asked me if she can go on the pill to regulate her periods. I have not given her an answer but have said I will think about it. Would like to get people's opinions. Is this a good idea or not?

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Becky - posted on 02/08/2012

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No parent wants their daughter to have sex at a young age, but the fact is most are, so the best way to help them is to prevent a young pregnancy. I thought my daughter was a virgin and then after Christmas she informs us she is pregnant. She had always been outgoing, had many friends and was admired by many adults, but she is a teen and thought she was in love. I think most of the time, it just happens, it's not planned, but it is better to be safe than sorry. She ended up having a miscarriage and became depressed and she has not been then same since the whole ordeal and our relationship has certainly changed, but I'm trying to remain supportive and she's beginning to get back to her old self. She is attending evening classes and God willing will graduate with a high school diploma, but she almost became lost in a matter of weeks. Helping her protect herself from pregnancy doesn't mean you condone sex, but it means you live in the real world. Sometimes we have to change the way we react to our teen girls because they change and we tend to want to treat them like they are still 10.

Allisa - posted on 02/16/2013

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I would put her on it becaus either way she is going to have sex so its better safe than sorry.

April - posted on 11/28/2012

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My oldest daughter is about to marry her boyfriend of almost 4 years.I never forced her to take birth control and she remained a vergin.I know you may think ahh one of those mom's that doesn't have a clue but you are wrong and I am going to tell you how I am sure.Our birth control talks were open and often.As her mother though I made sure that she was never in a situation where sex could be an issue, but I told her if she ever decided that he was the one she was going to have sex with then she was also going to use birth control and I would help her get it. The way we talked about it is this.I knew just saying don't have sex never works.However telling them about how special the V card is and how once you give it away you cant get it back.Also explain the emotional hole that a post sex break up causes in their heart and soul.Girls can get so down after this they try to kill them selves even.And what if it is a nasty break up and the boy that you think now wont tell anyone all this sudden has spread it around school.So Yeah it makes them think a little harder before they jump in with both feet.There are no refunds or exchanges.Right now you got a wonka bar with the golden ticket and everyone wants it.Once it becomes a snickers from the shell station that anyone can get no one worth giving it to wants it anymore.Before you force her talk to her,make sure if they were getting close to moving in that area she would come to you.If you can't be sure do what you must but realise you will send the message that says I don't care what you say I don't trust you

Wilma - posted on 02/18/2013

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wow there are a lot of responses to this - i have a daughter the same age and she wants BC for her periods and acne - I did not say yes or no - i made an appointment with her doctor.
I dont think I thought of sex - we have spoken about it and she is well aware of my position on it and I think I know hers.
I am a single mother - it is hard enough raising teenagers (I have 2) with their attitudes, mouths and dramas. Doing it alone, working and staying sane is miraculous.
I just try to be open - not freak out too much so she feels she can talk to me about anything.

Mandy - posted on 11/21/2013

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No to the pills..... Better safe than sorry. You should try Those pills that have the vitamins you need for during and after pregnancy. My aunt uses those and they do everything 'the pill' does and then some!

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Allisa - posted on 03/02/2013

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Brendaa turner》 but now a days girls have sex younger and younger. Just because you didn't til uwere 23 which is something to be proud of not all girls are like that. Which is why I said its better safe than sorry.

Sheryll - posted on 03/02/2013

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I put my daughter on the pill at 15 yrs. old for regulating her periods, and for her skin. Low doses. Worked wonders. We also led a very healthy lifestyle. And a open talk about sex and her body starting from the moment she could talk. Medically I understand this having a child that began her periods in 4th grade she had them long enough to know how she felt about her body. Her skin cleared and she felt better. We also made life style changes to help. No fast food, meat that is grass fed, no salt, no dyes in food. Sugar was very limited. All this helped. If she wants pills for another reason...you know your child we don't. Then a heart to heart is needed. I can tell you when my child talked to me about sex...I had a very hard time and didn't deal with it well. I wish I had done differently. I won't make a judgment telling you what you need to do that I believe is up to each parent to deal with in a way you deem fit and how it fits your child. The throw down sex talk came at a later age for me. My daughter is now married and trying to get pregnant...I did handle this better but now it makes me feel old. Dang no winning here until I see a blond blue eye baby. : )

Jennifer - posted on 02/22/2013

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Yes to the pills. However, she should also be educated about unsafe sex. If she just wants to avoid pregnancy, then someone needs to make her aware of sexual transmitted diseases aka herps, gonodria, HIV positive or AIDS..

Brenda - posted on 02/18/2013

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It really depends. You know how irregular her periods are and if she has any other symptom like severe cramps that can be helped by the pill. The person who said she's going to have sex anyway is wrong. Not all teenage girls go out and have sex. I didn't until I was 23. Talk to her more about it and see if you can find out. Also, talk to her about sex if you haven't already and the consequences (getting pregnant, stds, etc) of it. If you trust her I don't see a problem w/it.

Erica - posted on 02/10/2013

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Honestly, at the end of the day our opinions don't matter and I will explain why... Maybe she is telling the truth, who are we to suggest how she takes care of her body or how you let her. Then again, maybe she is wanting it because it IS birth control, well none of us are going to have to help our 15 year old decide what to do with a baby. At the end of the day it is your opinion, and your daughters wants and needs that count. If you're worried that she is sexually active and wants it for birth control, denying it will not necessarily stop her. If it were me, I'd let her get on the pill and then talk to her about the dangers to her body of unprotected sex (without a condom or female condom), and the dangers to her self-esteem.

Anna - posted on 02/08/2013

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My daughter is 17 now; but has been on the pill since she was 15 to help regulate her periods and so they would be less painful. The pill helped; but we ran into the problem of her not taking them regularly because she woke up late or stayed the night with a friend and forgot them at home, etc. We agreed that taking the pill at night was probably a better solution; but we quickly ran into the same issue. After many many discussions about the need to take her medication as prescribed and on a regular schedule, regardless if she was sexually active; she decided to try the nuva ring.

At the time, I had been on the nuva ring and loved it. She tried it for a few months; but had issues with it falling out. We discussed the option of getting the implant; but she was eeked out by the thought of having something surgically implanted into her arm. After meeting with her doctor and sharing with her [her] past experiences and concerns, she is doing the depo shot and loves it! No more arguments about remembering to take a pill or hassle with the nuva ring. She schedules her appointments with her dr and has really taken control of that area of her life.

Sarah - posted on 02/04/2013

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My 13 year old daughter. Is currently on a low dose birth control pill. It's helped her periods, cramps, complexion and the mood swings . I did talk to her about its multiple uses and warned her that yes its birth control but should she start thinking about sex we need to talk first and she would still need to use condoms... As she is a huge tomboy she kinda gave me the "yuck, mooooooom!" but agreed...

Maggie - posted on 01/31/2013

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yes let her better to be safe than sorry . i have tried my daughter on a few we are tryin to find one that suits.

Candice - posted on 11/17/2012

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I think it is a good idea for those purposes only. However, I do feel that teen feel that if their parents okays them to be on birth control, they are allowing them to be sexually active. You should have a long talk with your daughter about it and and decide when you are confident in your decsion.

Marita - posted on 09/28/2012

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the pill have a side effect dont forget...i m not an expert but ill know that there are more natural ways to regulate ....she need to give time to her body and get used to the changes that she is going through ...i dont know for how long she got menstruation but some girls have iregulated menstruations some time in the begining...

Mary - posted on 09/27/2012

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I totally agree. She has asked for it, now it is time for you to show her that you trust her. Let her do it, give her your support.

Kelly Ann - posted on 09/26/2012

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your daughter is going to be having sex if she wants to and not letting her be on the pill will not stop her if she already plans on doing so. im not saying she is sexually active, she very well may be using it for her periods. however if she is then you should talk to her about it and teach her to be safe cause its inevitable if shes made up her mind already. i made a post about teen drug use and trust. the drug use part doesn't really relate, but i encourage that you read it and apply it to your situation.

Heidi - posted on 09/25/2012

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LET HER!!!!! I remember back in the dark ages when i first went on the pill it was to regulate my period, but it also turned out that soon afterwards i became sexually active and a teen pregnancy was the LAST thing i needed. It is a GRRRRREAT idea and u really should be proud of her for coming up with the idea now instead of later when things could really become hard!!!

Maha - posted on 09/25/2012

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I think that at this age ,the periods are usually not regular , why don't you ask your family doctor ?

Doting - posted on 09/25/2012

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Yes, course it is. Just remind her if she does decide to have sex that pill wont stop std's and drill safe sex into her. you can't stop her having sex, just educate her. I can't believe you even need to ask the question tbh. She sounds like a well balanced kid if shes asked you to go on the pill, she could have done it without you knowing.

Support her

Deanna - posted on 09/24/2012

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She is telling you she might be ready and she trusts you enough to help her take certain precautions. It is a very adult decision. Not what you ever want to hear, but it is a mature thing to do.

She may not be ready, but wants to be prepared just in case.

I would take my daughter to the doctor to discuss the options. But, I would also suggest having a condom in her purse just in case. Better to be safe.

April - posted on 09/24/2012

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Did her doctor suggest it?If no it is probabily not the real reason.Talk to her about sex.You may not like what you hear but ,she is coming to you.Try not to be judgemental.If your not she may not be willing to talk to you about it further.Good luck.

Samantha - posted on 09/23/2012

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No matter what the reason, if your daughter is asking...there is cause. you should explain all effect of the meds. Get into detail about sex, condoms, and most important...abstinence. BCP can not prevent STD's. My daughter is 14 and I had a three hour conversation about sex. Became very graphic about STD's, and actually showed her how to use a condom. I feel knowledge is power. We must empower our daughters to make strong decisions, inform them, teach them, and be there for them.

Jan - posted on 09/23/2012

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I would allow it for two reasons a) it might help her regulate her cycle b) she may be using that as an excuse because she is now or is concidering having sex ad wants the protection from pregnancy. Either way if that's what she wants I would book her a doctors appointment and ask for the doctor to discuss with her all the pros and cons but then excuse myself and allow them to talk privately incase she has questions or concerns that she is uncomfortable talking about with you.

Alexandra - posted on 09/22/2012

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I think you should consult a doctor with your daughter and see what the best options are. Sometimes the pill alone is not enough, in my case, I also had to take cortisone.

Jeniene - posted on 09/21/2012

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I think if she is asking for the pill, you should honor her wishes. I know you might not want your 15 year old baby girl to be on the pill, but you need to have trust in her, and respect her decisions..... Plus in just 3 years she will be making decisions for herself, and it's time to let her have some say in these kinds of decisions about her life. Be sure to discuss this with her and her doctor and throughly explain the possible consequences of sex.

Sharlene - posted on 09/18/2012

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MY DAUGHTER HAD TO GET BIRTH CONTROL DUE TO A HORMONE IMBALANCE AFTER MEETING WITH HER DOCTOR AND A GYNECOLOGIST WE DECIDED THAT THE BEST TYPE OF BIRTH CONTROL FOR HER WOULD BE THE IMPLANON AS IT GIVES OFF THE RIGHT TYPE OF HORMONE AND LASTS 3YRS..THUS THERE WONT BE THE PROBLEM OF FORGETTING TO TAKE A PILL AND IT HELPS WITH REGULATION ON MORE NORMAL PERIODS..I SAY MEET WITH A DOCTOR OR GYNECOLIST ON THIS MATTER.I AGREE WITH BIRTH CONTROL IN YOUNG WOMEN..MY DAUGHTER IS NOT SEXUALLY ACTIVE BUT SHE WAS SEXUALLY ASSAULTED.THANK GOD THERE WERE NO DEATHS STDS OR PREGNANCIES INVOLVED.I KNOW THIS SOUNDS HARSH TO SAY BUT THAT SAME PREDATOR ATTACKED ANOTHER GIRL IN THE COMMUNITY AND SHE DID BECOME PREGNANT NOW A NON SEXUALY ACTIVE 13YR OLD HAS TO FACE A HARSH REALITY HER SITUATION WHILE HER PARENTS HAVE TO TAKE HER TO AN ABORTION CLINIC..I AM ALL FOR BIRTH CONTROL AND NOT JUST BECAUSE OF THE OBVIOUS REASONS.AND IT SEEMS THAT YOU HAVE OPEN COMMUNICATION WITH YOUR DAUGHTER FOR HER TO COMMUNICATE WITH YOU ABOUT THE SITUATION.WHERE WE LIVE MOST TEENAGERS CAN RECIEVE BIRTH CONTROL WITHOUT PARENTS PERMISSION..BE OPEN UNDERSTANDING AND EDUACATED WITH YOUR DAUGHTER..

Clarey - posted on 09/18/2012

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Birth control only seemingly regulates periods, It keeps ovulation from occurring by tricking the body into thinking it is pregnant. Just like in pregnancy, monthly bleeding can persist but is not a menstrual period. Oftentimes, fertility can be temporarily 'out of order' after stopping the pills in order to achieve pregnancy later (I know your daughter wouldn't fit into that timeframe for wanting to start a family but the hormonal imbalance is not worth letting her use birth control for any amount of time) Some women return to normal fertility immediately, others, like myself, are infertile for years. I stopped taking birth control when I was 17 and my period never returned. It took my Husband and I 3 years of fertility treatments to get pregnant with our daughter (now 2) and we have been trying again for #2 now for over a year. I'm not saying this is what happens to everyone on birth control, but some people are more sensitive than others I guess.

... at 15, I was prescribed birth control for my acne and all it did was make it worse! The ONLY reason to take birth control is for exactly that, BIRTH CONTROL.

Janey - posted on 09/18/2012

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I would take her to a female ob/gyn and have a talk with that doc before you do. Ask the doc to counsel her on birth control AND STD prevention. It's better to have her protected as much as you can than to refuse thinking it will prevent her from having sex. Then, get her busy with all kinds of activities that do not involve her being alone with boys. Major keys to keeping teens out of trouble is keeping them busy with activities that build their self-esteem, support their longterm goals, and keep them away from situations that promote trouble. I raised a strong willed, risk taking boy who never ever got into trouble and got top college admissions and scholarships. If I can do that with no outside help as a single parent, most parents can because most parents have some support and kids who are not quite so strong willed to start with. Just stay one step ahead of them and keep them talking with you. Be accepting but always channeling them in the right direction. They need supervision.

Angelita - posted on 09/16/2012

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If she is asking do it! I had ovarian cysts that made my cycle horrible at 13 I even got it for 30 days straight Dr. said bc n iron pills my mom decided no on the bc pills n I got pregnant 3 yrs later. If you say no you cant be upset if she ends up pregnant even if she is telling the truth or not as to why respect that she came to you many girls do not!

Jaimee - posted on 02/15/2012

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it is a good idea i think, she was honest enough to ask you about it. You need to have the talk with her and ask her reasons for going on it.

Jaimee - posted on 02/15/2012

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it is a good idea i think, she was honest enough to ask you about it. You need to have the talk with her and ask her reasons for going on it.

Tiffany - posted on 02/08/2012

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Thanks so much! I will definitely keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Becky - posted on 02/08/2012

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Thanks Tiffany,

I just found this Web site as I was looking for parenting advice for teenagers and my thoughts were confirmed, that every family has issues and even the closest and best have real life problems no would could have anticipated. I had a great childhood, with two loving parents who were strict when it was necessary, but I have to admit, I also did things that would certainly not make them proud and that I hoped would never cross my own child's mind, but we are all human, and we do the best we can, and I think, in the end (it may take awhile) we have to grow as our children grow, and we have to force ourselves to interact with them in a different way. Keep the prayers up for our family, everyone needs prayer, and I will do the same for yours. Hopefully, in a few months or even a year, we'll look back at this as a learning opportunity for all of us and and I can't help but think, things will look much brighter then. After all, if our children inherit some of our bad attributes, they must surely inherit some of the good.

Good luck to you.

Tiffany - posted on 02/08/2012

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Becky I just wanted to thank you for your post. I just joined this site not too long ago. I thought this would be a positive forum for mothers to share their thoughts and experiences. But after leaving my first post and reading some of the replys and others posts I felt a lot of negativity. I guess I kind of got a bad impression after the first few days on here. So, needless to say, I haven't really logged on. It seemed a little too argumentative and childish for me. But, then I received an email saying that you replied to one of the posts that I commented on. I decided to check it out, and I am glad that I did. Thanks so much for your post. It really helped me look at my situation differently. I know teens are going to have sex no matter how many times we tell them that they should wait. I was a teenage mother myself. And I guess I am trying to raise my daughter a lot differently than I was raised. I didn't have any parental supervision or anybody to care about what I was doing or where I was. I had way too much freedom. Sometimes, I catch myself being a little too over protective with my daughter. Just knowing what I went through as a young teen mom..... Im just scared. I want her to have a way better life than I did. I think that I get so caught up trying to make sure that I give her a better mother than I had growing up... But reading your post really helped me, so thank you. I wish you and your family the best of luck. Have a great night.

[deleted account]

First of all ppl don't go on the pill just so they can have sex! I think that when a persons daughter asks about going on the pill and if u sit and actually talk bout it with her right when she comes to u about asking the bout the pill I think that assuming that she might want it just so she can have sex is a lil ridiculous!

Tiffany - posted on 02/01/2012

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First of all I do trust my daughter, very much so. I just take being a mom a lot more serious than some. My daughter and I have a great relationship. Her and her friends come to me constantly with problems, questions, and advice. I consider myself lucky that they feel comfortable enough to come to me with these things. But, I think that some people are too quick to just hand their children the pill and some condoms and say, "go about your business. You're gonna do it anyway."

[deleted account]

Why don't ppl start trusting ur daughters! I think u guys are blowing the birth control pill way out of proportion. The birth control pill is not just for protecting urself when having sex, maybe they really want it for their periods! And besides I'm sure if ur daughters wanted to have sex they woulve already went out and did it without askin u to go on birth control.

Tiffany - posted on 02/01/2012

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I don't have an answer, but I am going through the same exact thing. My daughter is 14, in 9th grade. She is one of the youngest kids in her grade, and she IS the youngest of all of her friends. I like her friends a lot, there are 3 of them that are constantly at our home (which I love bc I know where they all are and what they're doing). But my daughter has asked me the same question. She has been having irregular periods ever since she started 3 years ago. I am very conflicted on this one. I know that a few of her friends are sexually active, and that scares me. I'm not one of those parents that say,"Oh no, not my child, she would never do anything like that". Peer pressure is huge and so is teenage emotions. I just do not want her to think that me putting her on the pill is a pass to go head and have sex. I am so very, very confused. You are definitely not alone in this!!. :)

Debbie - posted on 01/21/2012

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Yes. I believe it is. However; has she ever been to gyn before? How does she know about helping with periods? I think it is a great thing, she came to you. It is a very, very hard decision, because it's not like we want to give permission to be sexually active. Maybe she is, and this is her way of protecting herself, without directly telling you, yet.???? I knew my daughter was sexually active, so I decided to educate her with classes, the pill, etc... I do not condone Sex at such an early age. Do not get me wrong. However; it will happen whether i condone it or not. I'd rather have my daughter educated and protected........ Thanks for listening.

[deleted account]

I say put her I it no matter why she wants to go in it. It's just birth control! She may want it for her periods or just cuz she is sexually activity. Either way there's no down fall of going on birth control.

[deleted account]

I say put her I it no matter why she wants to go in it. It's just birth control! She may want it for her periods or just cuz she is sexually activity. Either way there's no down fall of going on birth control.

Katharine - posted on 01/15/2012

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If you are having doughts about her going on the pill then you need to not let her. Just use advil or go to the doctor and see what the doc's has to say. :)

Tiffany - posted on 01/11/2012

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I think you should let her. My mom kinda made me use birthcontrol (Depo shot) and decided to let me use the pill instead after 3 years. I resented that she was trying to make me use birthcontrol and decided not to take the pill. As a result I'm 16 years old and 5 1/2 weeks pregnant. it's better to teach her the importance of safe sex and responsibilities that go along with it than to try teaching her the importance of raising her newborn child and the responsibilities that go with it. So in either case, it's better safe than sorry.

Christina - posted on 01/01/2011

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Good idea. First it will help regulate her periods. There is a chance she could be lying and really wants to have sex but doesn't want to tell you, so she is asking for the pill for her periods when she really wants it for birth control reasons. Either way, I would do it. I was a teenage mom. The thing I learned is teenagers are going to have sex when they decide regardless of what their parents want. Most of my friends were virgins until they got married. I however was not. I'd rather have my 15yr old protected than pregnant.

BRENDA - posted on 12/31/2010

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YES...YES...YES....!!!....Even if that is not the "real" reason.....you dont want her getting pregnant and ruining her life. I told my daughter when she started dating at 16, if she wanted to get on the pill, i would take her to the dr. and i would not preach to her about it. we had had the "birds and bees talk". Teenagers are gonna have sex, with or without protection.....I DID. I did this because my sister became pregnant at 15 and i saw what she went thru and what my parents went thru. So why not prevent WHAT COULD HAPPEN....??????

Lynn - posted on 12/16/2010

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I have 2 daughters with the same problem. One went on when she was 16 the other 15. It has greatly helped both of them. I figure as long as you have raised them to know all the ground rules and consequences of any actions they may take you should be confident enough to trust them

Amy - posted on 12/10/2010

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It would be a wise choice to make an appointment for her with a gynecologist to discuss whether or not this is the best solution to irregular periods. Although there are many viable options for teens in terms of birth control the pill has some significant risks, especially for someone so young. Certain of the new BCP's have been known to cause gallbladder disease, blood clots, and stroke in young women. I would make certain that she knows the related health risks before taking the pill to control her cycle.

Nora Riley- - posted on 12/10/2010

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have you talked to you daughter's doctor about puting her on pill if the docor says it is ok then do it . I had to put one of my daughter on the pill when she was 15 and it helped her

Holly - posted on 12/09/2010

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I actually thought my 15 yr old should go on it! The women in my family have very irregular cycles. So that was one reason. I also know that it helps w/ acne and my Daughter suffer from a bad case of it.
We have tried various face products and some work. She would get them on her back and chest too, so she would wear long sleeves in the Summer.
So I decided medically it would be a good thing. She has yet to have a boyfriend, so I am pretty secure in the fact that is not being used for it's original intent.

Melissa - posted on 12/09/2010

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Well I just found out that my 15 yr sons girlfriend who im really really close to just got on the pill and I asked her why? and she told me because of her periods and of her acne well I believe her I know in my heart that they are not active. my son has 1 condom in his wallet and I check his wallet everytime he takes a shower and its still the same one. So if you believe in your heart that your daughter is telling you the truth then put her on the pill.

Dawn - posted on 12/09/2010

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I think it is really good that she has asked you and not just done so on her own. I think you should be able to trust her since she has come to you. I also think that you should talk to her about STDs as well.....just in case she has an alterior motive. It is always better to be safe than sorry. My 16-year-old daughter in on birth control and she is not having sex, but she does have goals and pregnancy is not in her plans at this point. I hope this helps you make your decision.

Suzanne - posted on 12/09/2010

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My daughter has been on the pill since 12. she suffers from extreme cramps, heavy bleeding and severe mood swings - just like I did. There is no reason for your daughter to suffer. Put her on the pill.

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