Need help with my 13 year old son...

Michelle - posted on 02/12/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My youngest son is 13 years old. He was born with some medical issues due to being a preemie. He was diagnosed with Sensory Integration Dysfunction Disorder at an early age. He has also had Autistic tendencies but we never had him tested because we didn't want him labeled in school. When he went into middle school the school system took him out of Occupational Therapy (they were afraid it would take him out of regular classes and it wouldn't be good for him). He is now in the 7th grade. Since being taken out almost 2 yrs ago his grades, organization skills, attention, etc has all gone down hill. I got his progress report this week and 3 classes are F's, 2 D's and an A (PE). We had his IEP last week and they had nothing but negative things to say about him. They took him off all services!!! I was upset. I had a meeting with his Pediatrician this week for his yearly physical and he had many concerns. He is 13 but only 66 lbs and not even 4 1/2 ft tall. He is smaller than most 8 yr olds. He had a hard time eating and he is failing in school, his Autistic tendencies are getting worse at home. I got the teacher evaluation forms from the pediatrician for each teacher to fill out. Of course, I was thinking they were going to write exactly what was said in the meeting and then we could meet with the Dr and get to the bottom of his issues BUT the teachers are writing the complete opposite. It makes my parent evaluation that I did look horrible. What do I do? I thought 'Is he really that different at school than at home?' He rocks and hums almost all the time at home but the teachers only see part of it. Help!

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Michelle - posted on 02/13/2010

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I have a friend who has a son that has medical issues that sometimes are barley noticable and other times stood out so far that they couldnt be overlooked. She also found that one contributing factor to him was that he was worse after a lot of observation when he was tired, such as after school, at the end of the week, maybe after sports day or if they had had a big family day out, then naturally she would tend to him at home with rest and all the things a mum does to get her child right again. In doing that his condition was kept quiet from the rest of the world, not intentionaly but that was the way it worked. When she tried to get help the question would always be asked "well what is the problem" she felt unbelived, tired and frustrated so she taped him with the video camera, she taped him after school, when he had a cough or cold, when he didnt have the energy to walk to the toilet or bathroom and then started to take these recordings to the specialsts with her to show first hand what they were trying to work with. It actually worked. I came to one of the appointments with her as she had become so dreading of any next appointments and having to explain over and over again, she wanted the company and support.
I belive with some careful observation on your behalf and some good timing and recording you might just record what you need to help explain your situation.

hey all the best, follow your instinct at what you belive is what is best for your child

Allie - posted on 02/12/2010

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You may not want to title him but if he needs the help he needs help with or with out a title. Makeing him comfortable is what needs to be done. You can talk with the teachers one on one personally and let them know that you do not understand why they wrote what they did. let them know to be truthful so he can get the proper care. The doctors will take into consideration that he is only at school part of the time and the rest at home. All kids are different in two different enviroments but they still have a pattern behavior no matter were they are and the doctors should look for that. You can make an appt to see a special therapist that can evaluate is behavior to help you and the school out. good luck

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