School not responding to bullying, what next?

Whitney - posted 3 days ago

Your son needs to stand up for himself and the school needs to step up as well. But the school stepping up won't stop bullying, your son will only lose more respect from peers and make it worse. He has to stand up for himself, ignore it and don't let it show.

Amy Nicole - posted 5 days ago

Bullying is illegal and schools should know this and be punishing bullies with a trip too the principles office and some extra work and a parent notified.And if the school won't do anything then you need too take it into you hands your son could get so sick of these bullies that he kills himself and that's NOT OKAY! Your not a trouble maker your sticking up for your son. Take legal action.

Brianne - posted 6 days ago

I'm not a mother, nor am I even an adult but I completely understand what your son's going through. When I was 5 I was bullied quite badly and had my mother get in contact with the principal, nothing was done and the principal, along with the mum of the child bullying me brushed it off and assumed I was making it up. I'm not quite sure where you live but I find that schools in Scotland are quite bad with this, that's where I was when I was dealing with this. There was also another time where I was bullied for about 4 years and the school still did nothing. It's such a shame that teachers and adults won't do anything these days. As a parent I believe that you should remain there to help your son and talk with him, it's very important that he knows you're there. If it's very bad you should contact the police or some organisation to help find a solution. It's a difficult time for children when they go through this but don't focus too much on that thought.

Jacqueline - posted on 05/09/2013

I'm not a mother but I do understand what your son is going threw Im from Marshall Missouri and my brother is also going threw the same thing and the school isn't doing really anything. Their saying my brother is the problem which he isn't. My mom has done almost everything to stop this bullying, My brother has been sent to a hospital to get help he asked my mom to help him that he couldn't deal with the bullying any more at school and on Fb. The bullying has affected him so badly he want to give up on life and drop out of school. The doctors put him on 50 mg of a depressant and on that same week he was discharged from the hospital in KC they had to raise the dosage to 100mg because of the bullying and my brother wasn't him self any more and also that same week he got beat up while riding his bike. Then again today that im righting this he was jumped as they say during his P.E class my mother and I have gone to the school and the result for me speaking up for my brother and also taking him to school was that now im also being targeted by the males that have been bullying my brother and its not just 1 its at least 15 students and 5 that have graduated. We have gone to the police and still nothing The school wont enforce anything. I fear for my self and my family sorry for any errors of spelling or grammar.

Chandra - posted on 05/08/2013

Is anyone here from MD?

John - posted on 05/03/2013

hey, i know I'm not a mom, but I'm looking for anything i can do to get this group of bullies off me and my girlfriend's back, we've been dating for 2 years almost 3. this whole thing started when we started to wear collars with a half of a ying yang symbol on it, they were soposed to represent that we love each other, but the kids at our school started bullying us and saying "if they are gonna look like dogs then they (us my girlfriend and me) should act like them" and other comments, i have confronted the assistant principal about it but he always says the same thing "ill get around to it" this has been going on for our sophomore and junior year of school, I've just about gotten to the point where i almost started a fight with one of them but i kept the thought to myself. i'm not sure how much longer we can take it, please any ideas on what we should do, email me at gmail (johnnywonson@gmail.com)

Daniel - posted on 03/18/2013

Hi I am Daniel and 15 years old my girlfriend goes to a school in Brooklyn called urban assembly institute of math and science for young women she has issues with her anger but since she started high school she had become humble. There is this girl in her school who wanted to go out with her and she denied her so she got mad and started to threaten and bother her. My girlfriend spoke with he principle and they mediated but that did not help th girl continued to threaten and go the her she even cursed at he in front of the principle . She thretened to stab and jump her. She has a lot of friends in school and my girlfriend doesn't so she I out numbered . My girlfriend to transfer schools but they did not except her now she is stuck she doesn't wan to go to school because of her bully buy she doesn't want a gas case. what do we do ?

Karen - posted on 02/25/2013

My son is 11 and autistic considered handicap not on meds never a problem. He has been kicked in the back today while waiting for the bus to leave school. This is the 4th incident this year, The school principals and vise principal are idiots. Every time someone has physically assaulted him. This time I am going to the police and contacting ACLU as soon I get the kids name. I was told before I was not aloud to know the assaulter. My husband went to the last kids house and told him it will stop. With that being said it did seem to resolve the problem that time. If anyone has more advise please fill free to help. POLICE , ACLU AND CHIROPRACTIC BILL WICH HIS PARENT WILL PAY FOR. jeffwilliams@atlanticbb.net

ROBERT - posted on 02/07/2013

SAM,
First you must calm down and take a deep breath. Right now you're doing great as a mother and don't think you're doing wrong. Go to the police file a report and press charges. After that get you a good lawyer and take the school and the girls who harmed your daughter to court! Then go directly to the media and let them know what's going on. Then you'll see action. Do it before its too late.

Sam - posted on 02/06/2013

We wrote letters to school edication and groverners and still no help she is makeing her self sick and not sleeping she's on meds to help her sleep she's not eating and this needs to stop I really wants to go round the childerns house and sort the parents out infront of the childern and see how thay fill watching there mum and dad get beat up sorry but I'm angry she is really timmed and shy and don't like telling anyone anythink its was only we I saw 5 girls jump her after school I relised she was in trouble she has speach delays and I think the bullys thinks she's an easy target coz of her delays she told me she had to take money in school for water but I founf out she had to take money in for the girls or thay would take her lunch any one no wot else I can do

Sam - posted on 02/06/2013

Hi new to theis my 10 year old is getting bullied and robbed she has learning dif and we have been to police edication and mp and done everythink in our powers to get it sorted and noone is helping us

Faye - posted on 01/28/2013

There is ALWAYS a boss above the one you talked to. Go to local school board, then go to State school board, then go to State Legislators. All the while document, document, document! including police reports. Even the local media if nothing changes.

Lita - posted on 01/28/2013

go to the board of Ed, to the superintendent, if the school won't help

ROBERT - posted on 01/28/2013

BY LAW THE SCHOOL HAS TO FOLLOW THE GUIDE LINES MANDATED BY THE DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION AND THE DEPARTMENT OF JUSTICE. GO TO stopbullying.gov AND YOU'LL HAVE MORE INFO ON THIS. MY DAUGHTER IS A VICTIM OF THIS BULLYING AND I WILL DO EVERYTHING IN MY POWER TO MAKE SURE THIS ENDS ONE WAY OR ANOTHER! EVEN IF I MUST TAKE LEGAL ACTION AGAINST THE TEACHER SCHOOL AND THE SCHOOL DISTRICT!

Jodi - posted on 01/28/2013

go to the police Christi, obviously nothing else is working.

Bonnie - posted on 01/28/2013

Have you tried speaking with the superintendent?

Melissa Jane - posted on 01/27/2013

i would go to the state board and take the school handbook with you. You have a right to go to the board meetings

Bobbie Jo - posted on 01/26/2013

Go to the superindent of your sons school and let him or her know you had enough and are going to the police to file charges, one so its on record at the school and make sure they put it on record that you filed a complaint with them, and two because you will need it documented, if that doesn't work tell them you are going to the public with your story, whether it is the news paper or new station or both. And don't give up let them know you are tired of it and mean business. No child should be bullied.

Barbara - posted on 01/22/2013

My daughter is now in fifth grade she has been punched kicked pushed,called names this has been happening since first grade I talked to everyone the only thing I haven't done was talked to the police. This boy and my daughter sat down and talked and he just don't care . The mother blames everyone else her son does nothing wrong. I'm going crazy dealing with this my child loved to go to school now she crys and begs to stay home. What more can I do nothing has been done this boy has had nothing happen to him only being told to stay away how when there in the same class I tried having my child switched or the boy and then refuse to.I'm lost and my child deserves to go to school without being abused.

Marley - posted on 01/01/2013

I am a 13 year old girl. I had been attending a Catholic school since preschool and this year i decided to go to a public school i got bullied every day about what i was wearing or who i was friends with.... i realized that i was not the only one that was getting bullied it was another child i became friends with him hoping we could deal with this together but it got worse and worse.....evidently i was socializing with the " unwanted "..... so i understand what your sons and daughters are going through.....and no one would help me or my mom and she's a lawyer....i am now back at my old school but the things that those kids say will never ever leave me:(

Jodi - posted on 12/30/2012

I would go to the police, they usually have someone who deals with the schools, a liaison of sorts. I know even in my small town we have a couple of police officers that works with the schools. They spend their time between all of the different middle schools and high schools. Even if it isn't a physical bullying, just name calling, they can do something about it. It is considered harassment and you have legal means to put a stop to it. I would let the principal know that you are tired of them not doing anything and that you have decided to take it to the police. Schools often times just don't want to deal with the hassle and will blow parents off or make them feel like they are the problem.

Then don't discuss it with the school past that, deal only with the police. Chances are they may want to sit down with you and the school though and you will have to be prepared to go in and be logical with facts only. Explain the problem and that the school was made aware and refused to offer a solution. It is their job to keep the kids safe, being harassed is not providing a safe atmosphere.

These days the cops are far more likely to intervene on behalf of the bullied student and parent because of how many things have gone awry from kids who were bullied too much and went over the edge.

You are the parent, you are the one in charge here, not the schools. The schools do not own your child, they don't get to make the rules, they have to follow the rules. They like to make parents feel otherwise sometimes.

Cari - posted on 12/28/2012

she is right.. !!!! a lawyer

Kim - posted on 12/28/2012

Christi,Go to school board. If that does not work go to the news paper and tell them what going on! If the school board do anything it's time to get a lawyer involved. If you are telling them about the lawyer they will do anything you want ! Did you try talking to the parents? I would do this first, then the school board, lawyer. Then ask the lawyer about the news paper. I hope this helps. Good Luck :)

Cari - posted on 12/26/2012

sad :( . when the world goes thru this. kids and parents..!.......... awful.. I never had that problem with my girl.. k-8th she went to a A++ school public and now 9th to 12th catholic school and in that school there is no such thing..! I WOULD change her if that was my kid.. no doubt or do what Jona is doing Home- schooling .... :)

Jona - posted on 12/26/2012

Your school is out of step. Bullying is taken very seriously at many schools these days. Do you have the option of changing/transferring schools? Would your son be receptive to switching? I know first-hand about bullying from when my brothers and I were growing up. Thankfully my sons' school district has a very strict policy on this type of abuse. Another option could be home-schooling, which one child I know decided to go for, very successfully.

Star - posted on 12/26/2012

honestly you shouldn't stand for any of that is it possible to change schools I know that's what the principles want but if they wont do anything you have a choice to go after the parent to find out why the kids are doing this to your child you can keep going after the school change schools or talk to your child about the kids and why your child thinks they picked him to bully

Cari - posted on 12/25/2012

MMMM CHANGE SCHOOL that is what I would do find a way . make it and do it.!!!!!

Flora - posted on 12/25/2012

If the child is special education then you may have a problem getting anything done. If your child is special education or has a 504 (this covers permanent or temporary physical disability) then you will have more rights depending on your state. I live in California, and had the same situation happen to my son. A boy was physically bullying him in the guise of being his "friend." I kept complaining, and they would always give the boy a ten day suspension, but would not expel him. I later found out that if the caretaker or parent can tie the bullying to the disability --guess what--the child will not be expelled. It took an act of Congress, but I finally got my son out of this situation and school. You stand your ground, mom. A Principal told me that "the squeaky wheel gets the attention." Now is the time to document all conversations at the school. The first thing to do is to get the rules and regulations of the school, the discipline policy. If you find out that the bully is special ed, then get the rules for your state through your Dept of Education. The District is playing the percentages. The less people complain, the less that they will do. You must pay close attention to the written rules concerning bullying, and the bullying policy. You must document, document everything. Then, go over their heads if you have too. There are many advocates nowadays who will help you. I know that you are trying to be be a rational person, and are probably quite polite. But now is the time to educate yourself--put emotion aside, and let them go ahead and make your day. If the school is not safe for your child, let the District pay for homeschooling. I've been there and have gone through this.

Marilyn - posted on 12/24/2012

you went to the school principal and they did nothing ---- I think I would call the police and maybe get child welfare involved ------ they are allowing your child to be abused.

Leigh Ann - posted on 12/23/2012

The school is supposed to have a form that you can fill out to complain about this(they won't tell you, you have to actually ask for one). Once the form is filled out, the school is required to investigate and to take some action. That is how it is supposed to work in a school that has a zero tolerance policy anyway.

Marian - posted on 12/22/2012

Some parents are populate at school , so the principal would never punish even the bully kid of them.

I know the list of those parents

Teachers - going to the same church - pretty mothers - politician - etc .

There is no point complaining to the principal , if the parent is not popular .. I learnt my lesson .!

Stacey - posted on 12/20/2012

Please look into your state laws. I can tell you if I had to I would go to school with my child, I would attend every class without letting any student know who I was and I would document anything I deemed bullying. I would then go to my lawyer and the ACLU if needed be. Your children have the RIGHT to go to school in a safe environment!!! If the school is turning their backs to it, sue them! Call the ACLU and see what your rights are to help with this, if the school is not showing good faith in giving your children a safe place to learn I would think his or her rights were being violated (thus the ACLU). There is way too much violence in our schools and we if as parents do not take a drastic stand there will be more, more violence and more deaths. I implore all of you that are dealing with this issue to call every law maker you have to, every news station around you, every parent in your community until someone listens and takes action to help! Make this VERY public. With what just happened in CT I would think everyone is listening!

Mina - posted on 12/20/2012

I am heartbroken about my son. I wonder whether it has something to do with him growing into a teenager? He is the most amazing, handsome young lad (11 now!), but says that he is ugly and fat, which is not true in the slightest. He has normal body weight and is increadibly handsome.
I think that he does not feel safe at home and it is difficult for me to admit that my husband and I have the same problems. I also feel left out very often and it makes me feel 100 times more guilty to know this. I am working on myself daily and talk to my son everytime he comes home from school, too. I have also spoken a couple of times to a parent of a child, who had been verbally/emotionally mean to my son. Although willing to listen, on those occasions the parent got very defensive. I believe in god and the only way to find comfort is to pray and trust in god.

Rachel - posted on 12/19/2012

What state are you in? Many states have passed new legislation regarding bullying over the last few years as a result of students committing suicide due to bullying. In Louisiana, the school now HAS to respond and document how the situation was handled. If a pattern of behavior or administrative neglect can be demonstrated, the student is entitled to transfer to a different school within the parish at the expense of the district (for transportation and such). Research your states laws. Something can be done. The schools don't educate parents about their rights because it creates more work for them (I was a teacher). If you can find a law in your area to support you, go in and show it to them. Force them to do what they are supposed to do. If not, call a lawyer. Especially those of you that say your children are being threatened with violence. Let a lawyer do your talking for you. And DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. Email so you have a paper trail. CC the superintendent and school board members directly. That makes INDIVIDUALS liable if you have to file a lawsuit, not just the district, so those individuals are then motivated to correct the situation. Keep a detailed journal. Write down what your children tell you, your response, and the school's/district's response with dates and times and names of people you spoke to. Let them see you documenting what they are saying to you. If your state allows (Louisiana does, without any consent), tape record the conversations. You can fix this. You just have to show them you mean business. Good luck, Mommas! Praying for you and your babies.

Lisa - posted on 12/19/2012

my son is being bullied nw its not verbal anymore. this kid said he was going to shoot him and his friends . i went to tell the prinipal , only to be told he cant be interupted cause he is n a meeting. well bull shit , this happnd monday, just days after that monster gunned down all those kids. so i called the superentendent , got nowhere with them! called the police . they came with me 2 the school , at the end of the day guess what , that bully only ended up with iss , then came after my son when school let out. he said snitches get stitches , then came at him. my 12 yr old fought him , now my son gets out of school suspension , so my point is how do we as parents help when no one wants to help us???? what can i do? i live n syracuse , and my son attends a vry shitty school. i have tried to get him transfered only to be told it wasnt happening that they couldnt do it. im @ that school in their facec almost evry day because of my son being scared 2 go. nw its out of control. what else can i do????

Lisa - posted on 12/18/2012

my son is being bullied also , its so bad now that this bully is now saying he is going to shoot my son and his friends. i told the school , called the school superentendent and called the police. the bully ended up with iss and at the end of the day came after my son again. my 12 yr old then fought him. the school suspended my child, and this all happened yesterday so calling the cops DON'T WORK. I am scared for my kid and dont know what to do.

Pamela - posted on 12/04/2012

My Daugher in Middle School has been Bullied, Beaten Up, Harrassed On FB, Etc. I have made SEVERAL reports to the School......and now she was just beaten up AGAIN...along with another friend as well. Punched, Kicked in the Face etc. Enough is Enough. I am a Single Mother of 4 Kids. My two boys have graduated and NEVER had an incident in this school. I now have took matters into my own hands and have filed Criminal Charges against this Bully. Now it all begins!~I have Lost ALL faith and Hope in our School Principal and Superindentant. It will NOT be tolerated Anylonger..and if the school will NOT do what they are supposed to do to protect our children while 9 hours in their care....I Will do whatever in my power to Stop this!~Our town is Very Small, Everyone knows Everyone...So, with that being said You know how small towns can be. I may be here with Alot of Enemies For Standing Up for Justice and What is Right to protect our Children But I Will Not back down. It truly Amazes me that The School Can Do whatever they feel is "Right Punishment" for Physcal attacks. There is NO Standard procedure in this school. NO written steps on what is to be the punishment as far as Detention, Fighting, harrassment etc. So this Bully only got a 3 day suspention after Punching, Beating and kicking 2 girls in the Face during lunch....BUT this was her 2nd time on record for attacking my daughter. Unbelievable!!~And Only 3 days out!~Yes! I have tried talking to the mother of this bully....Got NO Where. They usually think their Child "Would Never! or there must have been a reason Why"!~NOT!~Fact is She is A Bully and has done this for a very long time!~This is The LAST time she will ever lay a hand on my Child or Anyone Else's. I have just called in the News Station and All Local Newspaper reporters to investigate the Bullying at our small school and Ask the Administration Directly "Why is there NOT harsher Punishment"?? Maybe the Media can help spread light to keep our Children Safe and in a better protective enviroment in our schools. I am One Mom that will stop at nothing to Bring light to this!~Action needs to be taken seriously here because a Child in middle school Needs to be led By Example, So with the little slap on the wrist this school gave to this Bully it goes to show that this type of behavior is Acceptable and You will ONLY be given a little time out of the classroom(Which Doesn't all kids love to have a couple days off)......The Bully thought it was Funny and so did her mother while walking out of the principals office to get her 3 day suspension....and looked at me and laughed!~That makes my Stomach turn!~So, let's see how Funny they think it is when they are in Juvenile Court and the Local Media Parked in front of our schools for Quesitions to the School regarding how Little they do to give Justice and Protection to our Children Who have Been The Victims. Good Luck to each of You!!~I will keep this post updating when I proceed!~

Linda - posted on 12/01/2012

I was droping my son off to school one morning,when I noticed that this boy kept watching him his whole walk to the school door.Iwatched to see what was going to happen when I noticed the boy pushed my son.I jumped out of my van screamed out ,GET AWAY FROM HIM!!! The boy continued to stand there so I walked up and told him to get moving.I then went into the school where all the adult staff was chating in the hallway.I screamed out what the boy did and pointed him out.They went after him and havent heard anymore since then.I ask my son how things were going and he said good

Linda - posted on 12/01/2012

I was droping my son off to school one morning,when I noticed that this boy kept watching him his whole walk to the school door.Iwatched to see what was going to happen when I noticed the boy pushed my son.I jumped out of my van screamed out ,GET AWAY FROM HIM!!! The boy continued to stand there so I walked up and told him to get moving.I then went into the school where all the adult staff was chating in the hallway.I screamed out what the boy did and pointed him out.They went after him and havent heard anymore since then.I ask my son how things were going and he said good

Shama - posted on 12/01/2012

Everyone has a right to practice their own beliefs this country is built on that principle. It is your constitutional right. The next step to take is to go to the school board and notify them on what's going on.

Gina - posted on 11/29/2012

i'm going thru the same thing i had a meeting yesterday and it went terrible

Margaret - posted on 11/29/2012

my 7 year old is being bullied daily with name calling ,pushing and hitting.have spoken to the school repeatedly and they say they are dealing with the problem by keeping the bully in doors at break time and lunch time.this has happened numerous times and his parents have been spoken to but it still coninues.the school keep saying that my son can handle himself and hes not upset at school.when he gets home he's crying and he doesnt understand why the boy does it.im at my wits end and dont know what to do.just because he is out going and can handle himself doesnt mean he should be subjected to this every day.what can be done? please help??

Marie - posted on 11/27/2012

what state are you in? I live in central Florida, I need a good lawyer referral. Please help! I am meeting with the school administrators on thurs and I think that they gonna try to expel my daughter, therefore I need all the help that can get.

Marie - posted on 11/27/2012

I am going through the same situation and so far the school seems to be taking the bullies side. my daughter is now suspended pending expulsion because another student decided to attacked, bullied, threaten and beat up my daughter on school ground. what are we to do as parents? what are our rights? I am trying to hire a lawyer but I don't even know where to begin. I don't even know what type of lawyers handle these type of cases.

SMP - posted on 11/27/2012

I had to pull my daughter out of the school we were assigned. I am working with the advocate and a civil rights attorney. My daughter has an I.E.P. in place and I hope this is worked out soon. She has been out of school for almost 4 weeks.

Marie - posted on 11/23/2012

anyone with insight---I need help or guidance as to what to do. I don't want my daughter to be thrown out school because some student decided to attack her---although she told the girl she was not interested in fighting her and walked away, the student followed and punch her in her face--she is now suspended pending expulsion

Gabby Jade - posted on 11/23/2012

was that message to me marie?

Marie - posted on 11/22/2012

I am so glad you said that because my daughter who is now a senior was attacked by an 11 grader --the girl wanted to fight her on her way to her next class--she walk away from her and the other student followed her and punch her in her face--now she is suspended pending further action probably expulsion or alternative school. what should I do? my daughter is been bullied by another student and she is still paying the consequences.

Gabby Jade - posted on 11/22/2012

Homeschooling will help

Dom - posted on 11/18/2012

I was bullyed as a kid most of my school age life. My parents then got divorced in my late teens and I started to use drugs in college. Drugs seemed like the answer to all my prayers, I finally felt pleasure in my life. Long story short, I had a nervous breakdown at age of 22 and stopped using drugs then. I am now 32 and happily married with 2 kids and work in a high stress job helping others. But it was a long road, I had to turn to God, there was nowhere else to look and nobody to help. Teachers never helped in school, all knew what was going on. I think that their response to you is biological, "Your a trouble maker" I to this day believe that there is a psychological mechanism in us to allow the weaker among us to be open to 'destruction'? I know its a harsh word, but I think it fits, like survival of the fittest. They are somehow programmed not to interfere. You must do everything you can to protect your son, if you have to threaten with lawsuits, and actually get an attorney then do it! If you have to corner the kids and chew them out, without hitting them of course, risking a bs battery charge than do it! Go and shame the teachers, then go to the administration, its worth saving a life. I wonder how many people are totally dismantled because of their childhood bullying experience, there are no stats on that. At the very least your kid will know that there is someone in this world that will go to bat for him!