Sam - posted on 12/02/2010 ( 22 moms have responded )
I have a soon to be 13 year old daughter. She has a 12 year old boyfriend. They are both in high school. (where I live, high school starts in grade 7; I think what most of you consider middle school) Now, I know some of you are going to think that this is way too young but that is not what I am questioning. I thought that, as in elementary, this was going to be an innocent, in-school, BF/GF relationship, with no strings attached; over within 3 weeks. Well, yikes, it has been 3 months and seems to be going strong!!
My daughter has admitted to being curious but really has not interest in having sex. I have talked to my daughter about several aspects of sex; peer pressure, manipulation (if you love me you will....), what sex is about, the act of sex and what it, in my opinion, should be about. The reasons why she should abstain, the fact that once her virginity is gone, it is something that she could never get back.
I want to trust her boyfriend. At this age, the big thing seems to be kissing and the infamous FRENCH kiss. There was a moment when he asked her why she didn't want to, she simply replied because she wasn't ready...his answer was, "that's ok...i'll wait as long as it takes." He is only 12 however, he looks and acts about 15. This scares me. Well, I have this fear that, as time goes on, things might get a little deeper than they should at that age. His physical and mental maturity unnerves me. I was wondering if it would be taboo should I sit down with him and discuss the boundaries and limitations of their relationship??