skipping school

Lydia - posted on 02/21/2010

i have a fine boy. But when he turned 13, he played truancy and when i was informed, it was a shocking news to me. He has become a moody, sad, bitter and obstinate boy at the age of 13. My heart broke. But instead of scolding and grounding him immediately, i remembered spending hours and a few days to talk to him. I need to understand why he had become so bitter and angry. With whom and at what. After much time and effort, he began to open up and shared his experience with a teacher in his primary 6 days (age 12 then). That incident made him hate teachers. After much prayer and sharing with him, he was willing to forgive (tis is not a straight forward and easy thing to do). After leading him through those time, i also decided to home school him. Not trying to bail him from the situation and his mistakes but i want him to be nurtured in a different environment during this healing period. Now he is 16 and has grown into a matured, sensible and jovial young man with ambitions and dreams to live for. There is one more thing. During that time i help him to think about his future plans and directions. Things to pursue according to his giftings. This provides him with a direction in life and something to work for. Hope this can encourage you. Through all this experience, i did not fail also to let him know my disappointment in his skipping school. Without much reprimanding, we actually solve this issue amicably, when we deal with the root issues.

Kim - posted on 02/20/2010

We just experienced this with our 15 yr old daughter. The second time we found out she wasn't at school, we immediately called the police. They retrieved her from her boyfriend's home. The police then gave me paperwork to file for "incorrugibility" on her. Once filed with the courts (and approved by a judge), anytime she makes a misstep by sneaking out, skipping school, not following home rules, etc. - she gets a free pass right to juvenile detention. It is almost like a warrant on her until she's 18. My daughter actually took off hours after the police returned her from skipping school and we had to call the police again. She is now sitting in juvenile detention and has a whole new outlook on life (she's been there for 4 weeks and has 2 more weeks until her court hearing). You have to draw a firm line in the sand and hold to it. Although it has been stressful, I can sleep at night knowing she is safe & forced to do her schoolwork at juvenile detention. I believe the incorrugibility order is a great idea though - your local police department should have the paperwork for you.

Ana - posted on 02/02/2010

I agree with Shannon,make face the consecuences of skipping school and getting a good education, when my husband and I talk to our daughters about their education,we tell them it's the only thing we can give them because we have nomaterial things. Besides tell her thatyou would not want her to work in a factory if she could do better...But we all have our methods of dealing with our teens, eve though sometimes it seems we are helpless.

Shannon - posted on 02/02/2010

You culd try ...No education leads to not much of a lifestyle....take her down to skid row...Guaranteed most of those folks havent finshed school! Theres the option of get a JOB and pay her own bills.....kinda hard to get a job with no eduacation! It may scare her... My daughter skipped once and we took her privlidges away...it worked for us!! I am sorry you are going thru this!! FRUSTRATING!!! Does she aspirations of being something? Vet, Dr, singer etc....they all need schooling. Tell her hoe fantasic she would be at whatever it is she wants to be,...really punp her up!! It may help!! Good luck!!! Hugs and best wishes

Shannon - posted on 02/01/2010

If that was my daughter, and believe me I threatened this with her the one time she did ditch, I told her "If you want to play games, and not take school seriously, and want to act like a spoiled little child, I will accompany you to your classes. Every class, all day!" My daughter must have had some hell fire horrible image in her head because I never had another issue. Play the game, show who has more guts, do what you say you will do.

If that isn't an option, or you try it and it doesn't work. Talk to your local juvenile detention facility and let them "scare her" a bit. Give her a bit of a reality check of where she could end up if she doesn't straighten up. Look for a counselor in your area that deal with teen issues too. Good luck!

Anne - posted on 02/01/2010

Take her to the school by the hand and march her through the playground to the pricipals office - a few trips like this will have her begging to go to school on her own!