son got ex girlfriend pregnant

[deleted account] ( 4 moms have responded )

My son has gotten his ex girlfriend pregnant and his new girlfriend is being supportive of him of it, but the ex girlfriend is furious that the new girlfriend is going to stick with him, obviously because she had another agenda of them getting back together or whatever! My questions is I am the mother of the son and trying to help him to get his life straightened out so that he can be there for this child and help pay for this child, but he lives with me, his ex girlfriend is being thrown out of her friends parents house right before the baby is born and she will not ask her mother if she could move back in even though the mother is already planning a shower and christening and they registered and by the way she is on ly 8 weeks. The ex girlfriend has thought that I would let her move in with me, which my husband is against and my son because he has told her we won t be together but I will do what I have to for my child. I am so confused, I dont know what to do, The whole situation is bad and adoption or abortion is out of the question, Any advice is appreciated.

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 06/28/2012

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Yes, do keep us posted. And stay strong, both you and your boy!

[deleted account]

Thank you both!!! I knew that in my head, but, I felt bad that if she really doesnt have anywhere to go, that is my grandchild she is carrying!! Anyway, will keep you posted, the paternity test is scheduled for July 9th,

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 06/21/2012

9,046

21

1999

The ex gf needs to grow up. She's pregnant, but until you have paternity test in hand proving your son is the father, she has no right to "expect" anything.

It is awesome that your son is ready to take this on, though! You did a great job with that kiddo! For now, explain to little miss "planner" that she needs to make plans that are realistic, and moving in to your house does not fit into the "realistic" requirement. If she plans to keep baby, that's great, and she has every right to expect support from the father, but usually I've found that the more eager missy is to move in with the supposed father, or family of the father, the more desparate she is to get someone to claim the baby, whether it's theirs or not.

Her eagerness to move right into your family, and her expectations of your son ending a perfectly good relationship to be with her are pushy, and I'd be keeping an eye on her. Ultimately, she's got to get a grip and realize that she needs to look elsewhere for living arrangements. The rest can wait until after baby is born, but definitely determine paternity immediately. Something smells fishy to me.

Louise - posted on 06/20/2012

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I really dont think that you should allow her to move in with you, this is going to undermine your sons relationship with his current girlfriend and also put your son in an impossible situation. If this girl really has no place to go then she would turn to her mother for support and move home. Only is she is totally destitute should you move in. My feeling is the ex is using your motherly instinct to get a foot in the door and more access to your son. Lets face it we would all turn to our own mothers in time of crisis. Unless she has a really bad realtionship with her mother that is where she would go. It sounds to me that her mother is excited about the baby so why wont she go home. I can tell you why, your son is not going to pop by!

No step well back from this one, let the mother sort herself out and give your son breathing room to see where the current relationship goes.

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