Stay Home Moms with Teenagers

Lori - posted on 02/03/2009 ( 13 moms have responded )

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I find it more important to be home now that I have teenagers than I did when my kids were in preschool. Any comments?

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Ingrid - posted on 02/04/2009

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I agree! When they were little, we could fence them in, but now we have to let them live and watch and hope that we have taught them has had an impact on them. We cannot turn our eyes from them, we must still be watchful of them, guiding them and supporting them. They do not say it, but they like knowing they have someone who cares for them.

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Lynn - posted on 03/07/2009

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YEAH I FEEL THE SAME WAY. BUR I DO HAVE 2 HAVE AT LEAST ONE ACTIVITY THAT IS JUST 4 ME!!

Kate - posted on 03/07/2009

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I agree, I have a 17 year old daughter in her final year of school. I find that the best time to chat to her and find out all her news is just after dinner. We sit with a cup of tea and just chat about the day. Her two younger brothers usually take themselves off at this stage and do their own thing.



If I was working all day and only coming home at this time, I would be trying to catch up with everything in the house and would also be very tired. I don't think that I would be able to give her the same attention as I do now.



I was a working mom when she was little and I felt quite left out of her life, as her dad was her main caregiver. It is nice now to feel like her mom again, and less like a woman who just lives in the same house!



I have been at home with both of my boys (9 and 5) since they were born, and I hope to be able to be at home for them when they are teenagers too.

Jeanne - posted on 03/06/2009

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Funny I did the same thing you did my name is Jeanne I stayed home for the first 10 yrs of there liftle life..........know they're teens I'm back being a full-time Mom. My son is 19yrs & twins one boy and one girl they just turn 17yrs old.........this is my full-time job being back home........and have 10 eyes all over as well as 10 hears to listen, and being Mom again..........I love every minute of it.........and would not change them for all the money in the world...



Keep in touch & hopefully we can share notes...........and keep on top of the teen years!



Jeanne

Holly - posted on 03/06/2009

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I completely agree!  I am a freelance writer and in trying to find work, I just signed up with some temporary agencies that place writers for short-term projects.  But I made a point to request only off-site assignments, so I can be home when my teens are home.  There are so many temptations out there for teenagers!

Ruth - posted on 03/06/2009

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I absolutely agree. I left my job in the fall to work from home because I really felt like my kids needed me more now than when they were younger. I had had a mom of older children tell me this when I was pregnant many years ago. She really knew what she was talking about. I know this is the best decision I've made in a long time - to be home during their teen years. Here is something I wrote about this:

http://suchasmartmom.com/2009/01/28/of-t...

Roxanne - posted on 03/06/2009

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I agree with you, I have been fortunate enough though that the job I have has me home around the same time that they arrive home from school so I can be there at night with them when they need it.

Becky - posted on 03/06/2009

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It is nice to hear I am not the only stay at home mom with teenagers! I keep asking myself if maybe I should find a job, but everytime I think about it it seems my sons need me more than ever! They are 18 and 16. I do agree that most days it seems like they need me more than ever! The reasons have changed, now it is more for stability and moral support. I have a great relationship with my sons and watching them grow into men is unbelievable. They surprise me with all the little lessons I have taught them over the years. Especially the ones when I thought they weren't listening. I have been here for my boys for so long I don't plan on letting them down now. Even when people tell me my job is over! Their my kids, my job will never be over, it just changes a little.

Lori - posted on 02/05/2009

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AMEN TO THAT!!! I feel the same way!! I am as involved in my girls' lives and the lives of their friends as I possibly can be - and what I have discovered as they've grown is that they need MORE guidance and help and teaching as they get closer to adulthood than they EVER did when they were young babies, toddlers and children!! They are beginning to make choices for themselves - mostly good, but not always - and learning how to navigate their way into a more adult world........and it's hard!!! I'm SO grateful that I am able to be here with and for them!

Pati - posted on 02/04/2009

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In this day, I think it might be more important to be there when their teens than toddlers. I worked out of the home when my daughter was younger, around her school schedule, when she started jr high I started working from home more and on site less, so I could be available for guidance as well as supervision.  when her dad died her freshman yr I started working strictly from home. it has been tough financially with no company benefits and no guaranteed work, but to be there for her every day, getting her to and from school, being there when she was home or needed me. Not having to take time off when she was sick or just needing me. Like the first 2 years of her life, I just cant put a price on it.  Being self employed I can work all day or all night or a few hours here and there, its the best for being a sole parent if you can live with a unpredictable income. I was at every game she cheered at all through high school, every competition even the ones in Florida, every school function and it has been great. I have been able to get to know her friends better as they spend more time at our house since there is a parent home.  I know it means a lot for her that I am there. Sometimes it would be nice to have money to blow but in the big picture this is what matters most.

Inga - posted on 02/04/2009

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Due to my work schedule, I was unable to be a stay-at-home mom when my son was younger (I am a single parent). Upon his freshman year in high school, he wanted my involvment with school activities. Three years later & currently unemployed, I have volunteered a lot of time this month with the theatre. He & his friends will call out to me & the other parents. I see how much they appreciate our involvement in their lives, even when we try to be inconspicious. I don't feel I am invading his space, I KNOW he'd tell me! :)

Carol - posted on 02/04/2009

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I couldn't agree more! I have two busy teens what with sports and other activities. It is comforting for me to be there for not only transportation but support too. It has allowed me to help out their friends parents as well as get to know there friends much better. I do have to give kudo's to the moms that are off at work and can't be with their kids. I don't know how they manage to balance it all. I take my hat off to you!

Lori - posted on 02/04/2009

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It's so true! They want to spread their wings and have more freedom, and they should have that, but deep down they want to know we are there and that we have their backs. I believe teens need and crave boundaries. Thanks, Ingrid!

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