Suicidal teenage son

Michele - posted on 09/10/2017 ( no moms have responded yet )

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My 14yr old son has attempted suicide, ran away from home and is hiding how he is feeling. He acts normal but I can see his behaviour is not matching with how he feels. I have got my son all the support. He needs from the various agencies. So the focus is on helping my son get better which is as it should be. I just wish one person would ask how I am coping.as I am a single parent with no support from family who all say my sons behaviour is all my fault. I feel so isolated and alonr

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Sam - posted on 10/26/2017

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He feels unloved, worthless, like everyone hates him and he is nothing but a burden to everyone he loves.( I am 16. I feel the same. I didn't want to worry my parents, so I said nothing. That made it worse, but I hide it still because I love them too much to let them suffer with me. I take therapy once a week, and it helps, but I still hide everything because I'm ashamed. I came on here looking for advice.) He probably doesn't trust you enough to take his emotions seriously, or feels like you don't care. You need to show him how much you love him, how regardless of the way he is feeling you aren't ashamed or mad, that you aren't trying to help him just because it's your job, or you feel forced to. Sure, he gets help from agencies, but they aren't his mother. Wrap him in a community of love, and you will start to feel it too.

I'm sorry you feel this way. I'm sure he never meant to hurt you. I never meant to hurt my parents either.

T - posted on 10/20/2017

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I’m sorry. I know you’re really trying. There’s no way a mother wouldn’t! Don’t listen to the naysayers, it’s your life not theirs. Your son is a teen trying to figure things out. Is there anyone that your son looks up to? Maybe you could have him and that person spend some time together. Kids tend to listen better to others over their own parent(s). Teens have it rough these days. Us parents too. Hang in there.

Lyra - posted on 10/11/2017

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Speaking from experience, I recommend the following steps for you:

1. Get yourself a therapist and go at least once a week, if not twice a week for right now until things calm down.

2. If you are religious person and are a member of a church, see if there's a divorce support group ministry at your church or attend a weekly prayer group.

3. Find a National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) support group in your area.

4. Do something nice for yourself. If you like candles, go buy yourself a new candle, take a bath, go on a walk in a park or on a nature trail or just in your neighborhood and listen to some music that uplifts you, go see a movie etc.

5. Surround yourself with positive, supportive people and distance yourself from the negative, critical people in your life that bring you down.

6. Recite recite Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."

7. Recite Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path."

8. And remember, you are not alone!

It was only by the sheer grace of God, power of spirit, and wonderful friends and co-workers that I was able to survive through a horrible divorce and my then 13-year old daughter's (who is now 19 years old) near successful suicide attempt while continuing to work a full time job and be a parent to my 7-year old son (who is now 13 years old).

Jacqueline - posted on 09/14/2017

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Being a single parent without support is not easy. I would encourage you to pray and seek a ministry that will meet the needs of your family. Only you know if there is any truth to what your family is saying. As parents, we all play a part in our children's behavior whether big or little. As a single parent, we can overcompensate because the other parent is not involved or active in the child's life, sometimes creating a monster. Sometimes people on the outside looking in can see what we don't see because we are so close to the situation.

Somewhere down your family line or his father's line the door was open for suicide to come in it may have started as depression and advanced to suicide. I would encourage you to look up Scriptures on anxiety, fear, depression and read and confess them over yourself as well as your son. Get counseling for yourself also, I would encourage pastoral or Christian counseling as well. This will help you to understand what God is doing in your life.

Although things look dark right now, I can tell you that God has a good plan for you and your son. Read out loud Jeremiah 29:11 and put your name in there and make it personal. It is important you both to get the help and support that you need. I will being praying for you, your son, and your family. Be encouraged and take care of yourself as well. If at all possible when your son is at school, or when he goes to bed take some me time for yourself.

Kim - posted on 09/14/2017

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Dear Michele, Wow I can't imagine how hard being a single parent is in the best of circumstances and with the
added burden of your son's suicide attempt and running away it all adds up! My prayers are with you in this tough
time in your life. I know there will come a time when things are easier and your hard work will pay off and your
grown up son, who has overcome because of your consistent love, will say thank you many times! Hang in there, Mom, you are a fierce defender for your son and God give you strength in the midst of hard times! Teen years are tough on parents, too! Been there, sweet friend! I'm glad you have joined this support page and hope you do get great support and advice here! Also, what about a study group of women at a church or community group ? I know your time is tight but that might actually energize you being around others in your circle. Stay strong, you will win your son thru this and you are his advocate! =) hugs to you, fierce Mamma!

Angela - posted on 09/11/2017

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I'm sorry you and your family are going through this hard situation. I am so thankful you've been able to help him get the counseling and support he needs to try and recover. As we walk these hard paths it's important for us Mom's to also be reaching out for the support we need as well, and so often there are many who want to help but are unsure if you're ready or want to share. I'm not sure if you have a faith or belief system but a pastor or counselor can be of great help and are qualified to help you sort through all the emotions that come with what y'all have experienced. You'll be in my prayers for continued healing and comfort. Sometimes all we have to do is reach out and we'll be met with more than we ever expected.

Sarah - posted on 09/10/2017

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Why does your family blame you? When a child is in crisis they do tend to get the focus of attention. Do you have counseling in place for yourself? While I understand that you want people to ask about your feelings; they may consider it a sensitive subject to bring up. I true friend will response to you asking to be heard. I know when I had a dark time in my life, people avoided bringing the subject up at all. Even when I was ready to talk, but they could not read my mind. Reach out, like you did hear.

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