Teen Poll - Dating & Driving

Lorie - posted 4 days ago ( 1 mom has responded )

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So, I have a teenage daughter who is 15 years old. She's a good kid - makes straight As, stays out of trouble, teachers adore her....you get the idea. I'm not saying she's perfect (her sass mouth is a special level of hell)! However, for the most part, we are truly blessed with a wonderful daughter. More than I rightfully deserve, to be honest. But we are starting to venture in uncharted territory - The Dating Scene and Driving with Friends! These two topics have come up at our house more times thank I care to count and usually end with hurt feelings and an angry Daddy. So my questions are -
1.) At what age would you consider letting your 15 year old daughter date?
2.) At what age would you consider letting your 15 year old daughter ride with friends who have their DL?

For the first question, all I can go off of was what I was brought up by - you can double date at 15 and single date at 16. This was my rule AND my mother's rule. So, works for me. Not for the hubs. There is only one particular boy she cares to date and it's the same boy that has basically been in her life since 6th grade. We know him, his family, go to church with him, our youth director loves him....he's a good kid. What does he have going against him? He's two years old AND he's a boy (eye roll). No matter HOW good he might be, my husband is against him because he's a boy and he "knows how boys are". This topic has become a pretty touchy and tough topic in our house.

For question two, I'm not talking about - going out and staying gone for hours on end. I'm talking about the occasional riding to school together, go to town to get something to eat or go to the movies, driving to a ballgame. Your basic, harmless, quick trips. And when I say "go to town", town is literally in our back yard! Where the population is around 7000 and everything you need is about 5 minutes from your house. So we are not talking loooooong hauls anywhere.

Basically, my husband and I are butting heads on these two topics and I would like some unbiased opinions. I know his friends will agree with him (no dating, no driving) and my friends will agree with me. However, I'd like some input from those that do not know either of us! From people who have no emotional investment in these situations whatsoever. Thank you all in advance. :)

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Michelle - posted 3 days ago

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You have pointed out the classic differences between Mum's and Dad's.
Especially with Daughter's!!!! Dad doesn't want to admit that his little girl is growing up and, yes, remembers the thoughts he had about girls when he was a teen so assumes EVERY boy has sex on his mind. He doesn't want to even entertain the idea of his little girl having sex. My Dad has even said to me that I have only had sex 4 times (I am now 43 and have had 4 pregnancies!!!)
I think you need to take it slowly with your husband, when you are alone have a talk with him about how she is growing up and the apron strings need to be loosened. She needs to be given a bit more freedom or she won't learn to make wise decisions when she leaves home. Yes she will make mistakes but that's how we learn. It's our job as a parent to trust that we have raised our children well enough to make the best decisions but also be there to guide them when they make wrong ones.

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