Teen step-daughter won't talk to her dad!

Lisa - posted on 10/23/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My boyfriend is 15 years older than me. My 9, 6, & 5 year old moved in with him and his 16 (almost 17) year old daughter. Things are great. She doesn't mind that I am 12 years older than her and we have a great relationship. The only issue we have is that she refuses to talk with her father about personal issues. Her mother really isn't in her life and her father can sometimes be a bit close-minded. He is very strict with her and if she does have something she wants to say it turns into a big argument. I try not to get in the middle since she is not my child, but I feel like their relationship is falling apart. She has assured me that she hasn't been having sex and I do believe her. I have told both of them that if she tells me something that her father NEEDS to know I will not keep it a secret. If I tell him something that she has told me he gets upset and says 'well, she would tell you before she tells me.' I don't know how to get them to talk with each other and not fight. I come from a very close family and it hurts that they are not close. They are really all they have. My boyfriend doesn't talk to his brother and his daughter has a sister the same age as I am so they are not that close. I want her to feel comfortable talking with her father as well as me.

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Mary - posted on 10/27/2009

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i think u bein her friend is enough for now. if u experience anything that is for him than tell him. but she is a girl and maybe she just isn't comfortable. be cool with her. she needs u. everything will be okey. just be in touch with the father as well. but don't betray the comfort zone u have with the daughter.

[deleted account]

At that age girls do not want to talk to their father about their personal issues.....it is a mother they need at their side biological or step does not matter. You may try to give her tips on how to have a conversation with her father.If their relationship is falling apart then you need to get in that middle, you are a family even if you are not married etc.

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