Tamara - posted on 04/23/2012 ( 14 moms have responded )
I heard from a family member a few months ago that live in our community that they witnessed my 14 year old son behind a gas station with some other kids smoking pot. I was incensed to say the least. However I kept my cool when I addressed him and told him that although I understand his curiosity and perhaps peer pressure that may have lead him to do this. I told him that it is not cool and that pot is a gate way drug to harder substances. I told him about addiction and how it has ruined people’s lives. He said he understood and not to worry.
Fast-forward… we have been having issues with attitude and his lack of motivation with school work and everything. I assume from reading most post that most teens at this age are like this. All he cares about is texting, friends and video games. He is an average student, despite the teachers and I know he could be doing much better but is content with just getting by. Not to get side tracked, he came home the other night from hanging out with friends appearing slightly off. Red squinty eyes and an insatiable appetite. I asked him if he had been smoking. After much evasive ness the confessed and told me that he had been doing it for months. I told him I was very disappointed at him and that we would talk about it a little later. I had to quickly gather my thoughts and figure out how best to handle this situation. About 30 minutes and a glass of wine later. I sat him down for a heart to heart. I started with look I am going to be honest with you. I do not condone you smoking pot what so ever. However I cannot keep you in a bubble so that I trust what you are doing. I told him that I have in my own day tried it as well but I was in my 20’s and it lead to a heavier addiction that cost dearly. It lasted a few years and I cleaned up when I got pregnant by him and decided to grow up.
I told him the truth and answered his questions as honestly as I could. I told him that I understand that pot is prevalent with kids in school. I just didn’t think it would be middle school. I realize that I can’t stop or force him. I can just equip him with the facts and hope that he makes the right choices. I got him a few library books that talk about the uses and effects of Marijuana use so that he is aware. I also told him although I am being honest with him I want him to be honest with me as well but that does not by far mean in anyway shape that I want him thinking this is cool because it is not. I talked to him about peer pressure and making the right choice of not trying anything more than pot. I hope I handled this the right way. Any comments?