Venting

Dree - posted on 10/07/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

89

63

My 15 year old needs to take lessons from him. My boy assaults everyone in the house then when police come to tend to him he hits them as well. Yet the police do NOTHING about this. They blame it on his BiPolar that he is WELL medicated for. We've even called the police with evidence of hitting, kicking, biting, and objects being thrown at us. As well as holes placed in walls and doors and broken items tossed on the floor. He admits to them each time he's done it, that yes it was just done while we were on the phone with 911, and that he did it because "I was pissed that wouldnt let my play video games" OR even because we asked him to please get off to eat, shower, go to bed, etc. He appaered before a judge in Juvenile System ONCE. The judge dropped his case....this was the one and only time he assaulted his older sister. Judge told him if police were involved one more time he would be doing time behind bars. Since that time, this past April (his 15th birthday to be exacaat) we have called the police at least 10 more times. He has not even been sent to court knowing he has a record. In fact, the police tell us we cant even press charges against him. That child protection will just get involved and we'll end up losing both kids. We already child protection involved and have told police this a number of times. Still nothing....So now at 15 yrs old with countless hospitalizations behind him, several visits by the police, an appearance before a judge, and even "scare tactic" of being placed in cuffs and sitting in a holding cell for 8 hrs...he's being placed in a residential program. He's taller than any of us here anymore. He's stronger than both his mom and I...we're both disabled plus I'm in a wheelchair. We dont want to send him but honestly we're at the end of ropes and dont know what to do anymore.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms

3 Comments

View replies by

Dree - posted on 10/10/2010

89

63

Angie my child is on 3 different meds to control his rage fits. I am also bipolar so I do understand his torment. But I no longer believe for even a second that he has no control over the fits he throws. He can be screaming, yelling, kicking, punching, swearing, biting, throwing items one sec...and the second I get off the phone with the police he is instantly calm because he knows they will take him back to the hospital if they see him behaving that way. He has progressively gotten more and more violent over the last 4 years. It started with flat out "no i'm doing that" and went to pure assault in the matter of 18 mths. He even and stole lighters and was burning playing cards, books, you name it in his room while other people were home. However, his room is in the basement and considering I am disabled I cant go down and check on him like I want to. In fact we only knew about this because he set off the smoke alarm with this act. He's told us that he will kill us if we make him shower. He's told police to just shot us so we'll leave him alone. He's told us "I'm 15 and have a life of miy own stay out of my business" We have found at one point over 500 pics of nude women in his email because he hacked a computer and signed up for ADULT sex sites...claimed he was 18-20 and was talking to all these women. So no I dont believe he does not know what he's doing is wrong...no I dont believe he has no control over his actions...but yes I love my son and want what is best for HIS and our families safety and well being.

Angie - posted on 10/08/2010

2,621

0

I am bipolar and I can understand the rage he feels. I found an amazing doctor who has been able to stop those feelings for me. Please remember that he cannot control his anger - his brain doesn't have the ability to control these things. This is NOT a behavioral issue, it is a medical issue. If he truly was well medicated he would not be having these rages anymore. Find a different doctor who can adjust or change his medications so he is well again. If he has grown a lot he will need both his meds adjusted. I just can't stress to you enough that he is not a bad kid, he is a sick kid.

Stephanie - posted on 10/07/2010

1

8

I'm so sorry for your torment. I know exactly how you feel. My son is also "bi-polar" and it is a truly abusive situation to have to live with someone of this nature. He has physically attacked his younger brother and is constantly emotionally abusive to all of us. I wish I could say something to make you feel better but I think I am coming in to the realization that the behaviors are not going to stop.The medication helps but not enough. All I can say is to try and hang in there, know your not alone and ask God for strength and support. He will always hear your prayers. and please remember that through it all....your son still needs your love. Good luck, I really hope you and your family find some peace soon.