Vicous Parents Sending false Info. to College Admissions

MyFavoriteSon - posted on 08/04/2012 ( 12 moms have responded )

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Help!! I live in a very competitive neighborhood. I have busy body neighbors asking where my teen is applying to College. How do I answer nicely but sternly, that it is none of their business!! My other fear is that anonymous notes will be written to the Colleges my kid applies to, and will get hurt from admissions by incorrect data. I believe my Child has already told a few friends. I keep telling him to keep it under is hat. What to do? Thanks!!

PS I am getting the sense the more secretive I become, the harder they seek the info.

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Bobbie - posted on 08/23/2012

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Number one question - why do you speak to those that you feel use your words against you or look to cause harm. I wouldn't be speaking to these people at all. You sound sneaky as well since you want to still communicate with them but learn to be evasive with your answers. Don't let them bring you to their level for goodness sakes. You either speak to them as a neighbor and or friend or don't have conversations with them. That is the adult mentality. To employ tactics, and fear, going so far as placing a question on this site dragging your son into the fray tells me your social skills haven't developed past middle school or high school level.



Number two question - Why drag your son into this silliness? I felt immediately upon reading your question that YOU have too much time on your hands. YOU make it not a very nice place live and you are unhappy. YOU must see snipers behind every bush and only feel you are up against a gang mentality

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/08/2012

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I work at a university, and we do not take unsolicited letters as admission files. I think that you are possibly a little paranoid about things at this point. First of all, why would anyone try to "sabotage" your kid? Has he just been an incredible delinquent, and gotten on everyone's bad side?

Generally, neighbors aren't the least bit concerned with your kid's college applications, and certainly not enough so that they'd try to write letters. If you've lived in the area for awhile, they're naturally curious...they've seen the kids grow up, and know that they're moving on. The questions are totally natural, actually, I've done the same, and had the same done with my sons.

Honestly, I don't see the big deal, and the more paranoid you are about the whole thing, the crazier you'll drive yourself, and the sooner you'll get there!

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/08/2012

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Please do! I'm interested to see which one he picks. RB is still deciding what to do, with his medical condition holding up enlistment in the army, he's a little lost for this year. I'm encouraging him to pick up some basics at our local CC, but...we'll see.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/08/2012

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Fav, it really should be ok, especially if you're still considering the schools that you were talking about in your other posts. Those would DEFINITELY not accept letters that were unsolicited :-)

MyFavoriteSon - posted on 08/08/2012

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Hi Shawn

Your a funny guy!! Actually my kid is very well liked. It is one of his Parents that we are worried about. It is a personal issue going on. I have been warned by a friend that some Parents are trying to find out where our Child is going. Yes, perhaps I am paranoid. Living here would make anyone paranoid!! I will take your advice Shawn and we will see what happens. Thanks for your response!

MyFavoriteSon - posted on 08/07/2012

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This is not a very nice place where we live. Too many Mothers with too much time on their hands. A bunch of very unhappy people. These people have a gang mentality.

Thanks Stacey, I hope you are correct. Time will tell!

Karen - posted on 08/07/2012

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I know several College Admissions folks and the only data that they rely on is school grades, official letters of recommendation, and the child's essay. Unless people are able to falsify the essay (in which case it wouldn't be anonymous), you have nothing to worry about. Yes it's not really their business, but who cares if they ask? I think you're making yourself crazier than you need to. Unless the anonymous people can prove he's an ax murderer or bank robber, no reputable college would deal with something anonymous anyway. If they do, is that really where your child wants to go anyway? It seems like that could make his decision easier, actually.

Sherri - posted on 08/06/2012

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Why would anyone care and do such a thing? We told everyone the colleges we applied too. It was so fun to hear where everyone was applying too.

MyFavoriteSon - posted on 08/04/2012

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I guess I am worried and don't want any negative input. I want my kid to have the best chance possible without any bad stuff floating around. I think there is a good chance of getting in. Thanks for the feed back!!

Chaya - posted on 08/04/2012

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Why worry about it? The child will have letters of recomendations from teachers, employers, etc, what the neighbor says won't hold much, if any, weight

User - posted on 08/04/2012

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okay, i guess i'm lost. why is this such a big deal? i told anyone/everyone when i applied to college..i guess i don't get why it's such a big deal. are you afraid your child won't get in and you'll be humiliated? as far as neighbors sending in letters about your kids, you should probably choose better references for your application. no college will take random letters from the neighborhood to decide enrollment

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