What to do with an 18 year old who is basically addicted to his computer?

Wanda - posted on 10/31/2008 ( 13 moms have responded )

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He's a great kid - no problems with drugs, alcohol or girls. My husband won't do anything about it - it's up to me. I can't get him interested in other activities. This has gone on for a long time. I feel helpless. His social network does this too. My girls did computer some, but not to this extent. I feel like it's too late. No extended family here in CA either.

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Carol - posted on 09/18/2013

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Wow you are in the same boat as me. I have a good kid. No alcohol, no drugs. He just loved the computer t much. He hates school and doesn't awant to go and he doesn't want to work. I have been dealing with this for years. I have another kid at home who is very good and no problems with addiction to the computer. I have resorted to cutting off the internet. Then my son goes to his dad's and it costs me more to support him there because his dad is on disability. Plus he gets the internet there. His dad can't cut it off because my other son living there is doing college and computer programs. What to do?

Shelly - posted on 07/19/2009

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Wanda,

You need to get back to my house my rules and set a time limit on the computer...End of story

Gloria - posted on 07/18/2009

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I believe it can be a problem. I know two people that are computer addicts but I will only mention myself. I spend hours surfing the net, playing games and chatting. It becomes a problem when absolutely nothing else matters or interests you any more. I know I have a problem so I force myself to get away and I don't put the computer before my family, if there is something that needs to be done, I will do it. I have read and seen many TV shows about this very topic and it can get extremely out of control. I am drawn to the virtual world which has absolutely nothing to do with the real world. There may be an underlying problem. Please feel free to message me if you have any other questions.

Heather - posted on 11/06/2008

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Hi Wanda,

Its great to hear that he actually enjoyed himself. It's so hard as a parent to know if when you make your kids do something it will actually work out. It is nice to hear that sometimes it does work out.

Heather

Keisha - posted on 11/06/2008

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i wouldnt allow him to be on it all day... tell him tues and thurs are no computer days in this house...



my daughter is 13 and her time is limited on the computer...



have a couple of days where u guys do something together where he's too busy to be on the computer?

Teresa - posted on 11/04/2008

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Wow, there are really some great ideas here! I want to try that family game night. I'm new to this community too, and have the same problem with my son (age 16). Luckily we have always required him to be involved in at least ONE other thing, and he chose Scouting early on, so he's got a weekly meeting plus one "unplugged" weekend a month in the outdoors. His high school has elective academies, and his Engineering Academy has a fair number of team projects, so that too puts him with others. But this year we finally gave in to the computer addiction and encouraged him to also enter his school's Information Technology Academy. He's learning more about computer hardware and earning Cisco certification. He started in August and already has earned a (tiny) college scholarship and has one local company drooling to get him on the payroll for a part-time job. I'll bet he'll enjoy it more than flipping burgers or bagging groceries, the traditional teen boy jobs in our area. So - maybe you can find him a computer class somewhere?

Gwen - posted on 11/03/2008

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Wanda, I have two teenage boys 13 and 17. We have the same struggle with them. What my husband and I have done is put a password on the computer and they are not allowed to use it until they have completed their chores, homework, etc. We have also used a timer and a sign up sheet. They have x amount of hours a day to use it and they must sign up in advance.

As another mother stated, we also have enforced a rule that they MUST attend church and youth group. We also have enforced a family game day (which is on Sundays). We spend the time together playing board games and sometimes Rock Band on Playstation. My 17 year old has started inviting his girlfriend who has been enjoying the time. These past two weekends he has even invited other teens to come over. They are all excited to play games together and even think it so cool that we join them.

My oldest son is a senior in HS and has had his share of problems, but this has helped us reconnect as a family.

Hope this helps.

[deleted account]

Hello just thoughti would see if maybe this would work just try it

ask him to let you know what he wants to do one day befor so if he wants to do somthing on the weekend he has to ask you on thursday and so on

Deloris - posted on 11/02/2008

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I also have a son who is a high school senior and addicted to his computer. Its' a daily battle to get him into any activities. Like your son, he never gives us any problems in any other area, but if I let him choose he would be on his computer 24/7. I do have to force him to go to youth group on Sunday nights, but he always has a good time when he goes. I think it's just a fact of life in this technology driven society, but I'll continue to make the effort to help him have a life away from the computer screen!! Don't give up and don't worry too much. If he's a good kid, he'll be fine. Maybe it will even help him in his future employment.

Lisa - posted on 11/01/2008

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hi Wanda my daughter is 15 and also addicted to her computer but she has out side activitys. she is involved in youth group and she loves it they are a wonderful bunch of kids that do fun healthy activities. we are truly blessed to have teen aged children that are not involved in the ugly things that the world has to offer our children..... i am so glad that your boy has found a constructed outlet.. good luck to you

Wanda - posted on 11/01/2008

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Thanks for your reply Heather. It's is comforting to know that others are struggling with the same thing, yet I know we can't give up on improving our kids, and sometimes making them grow - which at times means they need to step out of their comfort zones. I actually made my son go to Youth Group and church on Wednesday night. He didn't want to go, but he typically doesn't have much homework (his senior year), and it was a night off from work - and for some reason he hadn't had a Wed. night off in a long time. He went and had a great time . . . and, I'm so happy to say that he was invited to a Halloween party that he went to it and had a blast. It was a healthy environment, and he made more friends. Yeah! I'll keep working on it - and give you suggestions when I come up with them. I have more ideas, but cannot respond right now. Take care!

Heather - posted on 10/31/2008

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Hi I'm new to this community and have two teenage girls. I hear this a lot from other parents and have experienced this with my own kids. This is the way that kids connect with other kids this days. It is so hard to get them to go out and do things sometimes though. I finally made it a requirement for my kids to participate in family events. Both of my daughters love animals so I set up time that they can do things with animals - internship with animal lab, and volunteering at the local animal shelter. My son who is not a teenager yet, is much harder. He would prefer the tv and computer over seeing his friends at all. I haven't figure out what to do about yet, either. I would love some good ideas.

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