When do you consider your child as highly gifted?

Patricia - posted on 12/27/2012

I was looking at your last line and talking about having issues with writing. Just because a child is highly gifted does not mean they will excel in every single area.

Our Daughter is exceptional, but is having problems with math of all things. It isn't that she doesn't understand it is that she is plain not interested in it and therefore has decided it is not for her-ha.

We always knew there was something different about our Daughter, but when our pediatrician talked to us and mentioned it we then knew wow she is gifted.

Jami - posted on 10/30/2012

when I explain my son I usually say "gifted range" or twice exceptional.



it's a challenge that's for sure...he tested at 136 (the ceiling for the test he was given) and since he did score at the ceiling he's going to be retested. but he's not labeled as "highly" gifted because he isn't over 138.



For now the school is challenging him sufficiently that his behavior problems are mostly a thing of the past, and the few issues he still has we're helping him with at home.

Elika - posted on 10/25/2012

My girl just turn 4 on September 28, and since she had 2 she know the abc, she count in Spanish and English, she sing and talk very well. When she has 3, she learned how to write her name, her lastname, her sister name, and some other world. Now she has learn the sigth word and she's doing very good. Is she a gifted girl??? Some people told me that she's very smart and independent for her age.

Sarah - posted on 02/27/2012

my son is 2.5 and for fun i brought a model of the human body he knows all the organs and has fun taking them out and putting them back in again. Hes learning the skeleton right now (ribs,spine,sternum ect). I dont know if hes gifted or not a up a post explaining some other things but forgot to add his love for the human body

Sarah - posted on 02/27/2012

my son is 2.5 and for fun i brought a model of the human body he knows all the organs and has fun taking them out and putting them back in again. Hes learning the skeleton right now (ribs,spine,sternum ect). I dont know if hes gifted or not a up a post explaining some other things but forgot to add his love for the human body

Julie - posted on 10/21/2011

I know this is an old post but I did want to mention that what we might perceive as "issues" with writing in gifted children may be a matter of us not remembering that many gifted children's fine motor skills lag behind (usually more in pace with their actual age). So while a 4 year old may be able to read and identify letters/numbers etc.. they may not have the hand control or coordination to write-- also, many gifted children get very frustrated when they aren't able to write or draw what they can clearly visualize. I find that one of my challenges with my daughter is to help her understand that she will have to practice writing and drawing so she can "teach her hands to do what her brain wants them to."
To be attempting to write at 4 is great; I wouldn't worry too much. You might find it informative to learn about "asynchronous development" in gifted individuals (http://giftedkids.about.com/od/glossary/... )

Sarah - posted on 03/01/2010

I have a 2 year old as well that is counting up to 13 as well as saying her abcs. She is starting to recognize letters and walks around the house counting everything. So its not just that she can count up to 13 but is actually counting things. She is constantly bringing books to us and asking what's this what's this. I always ask her the same question back and she can tell me its either an animal or trees or something. Just out of curiousity, Rachel being that your daughter is 4, Is she still doing things that an average 4 year old wouldn't do? Just curious as to when or if they stop advancing or if they keep advancing for their age.

Jane - posted on 02/28/2010

keli,
it was so great to hear from you...i thought i was going crazy because i have truely been thinking she has a photographic memory....she remembers something that happens only one time....it is not like i have time to sit and do these things all day long or anything...she wants to read all day long....my hubby and i take turns reading to her all the time....then she will get a book and sit on the floor and read by herself....she really shocks me sometimes....i only hope i can do enough for her.......i have had her since she was 6 weeks old and i totally do nothing but take care of all 3 of them everyday...i want them to have the best they can...jane

Sheila - posted on 02/28/2010

Jane,
Your grandchild sounds so much like my daughter when she was two. She started reading at that time and had a very good vocabulary. She started writing her own stories at three. When she was tested at eight, she scored 146 and we found out that she has a photographic memory for numbers. She is now a sophomore in college majoring in cellular and molecular biology. It has been so much fun watching her grow up. We are so proud of her.

Kelli - posted on 02/28/2010

Wow... when there are so many responses, the subject seems to veer. I see a lot that I would love to comment on or get into more, but sticking with the question posted:
Not being able to write is pretty common, as one response said. I have 2 sons (one is 20 and the other is 5), and both of them could not write or even hold a pencil correctly when they started school. My oldest is gifted and I suspect my 5yo is highly gifted, although we haven't tested him yet. A patient teach will recognize that although they may be capable, they may not have had any interest in writing, or they are afraid to try something new and fail. I'm happy to say that my 5yo is now writing his own comic books, just a few months after learning the mechanics.

Jane - posted on 02/26/2010

i, like everyone else, wonder what the definitions are....i have my grandbaby...she made dec 21....last summer she knew all of her alphabet....she could read about 50 words....she could speak with perfect diction, clairity, and word usuage.....she was speaking in complete sentences......she was countng to 20 at about aug and sept....can count to in spanish, and will actually sit there and count in spanish, and in the middle switch to english for the next number and then switch back to spanish with out missing a number......she will hear or see something one time, "happy face" family with granmommy and pawpaw and brother sister and baby......they are all different sizes and some have hair etc......she knows all her shapes and colors.....can sit and count items and tell you how many there are of them....it just goes on and on......it is truely amazing the stuff she comes out with.....the sad part is i dont sit and go over this stuff with her all the time.....she only needs to see or hear it once and she has it...i truely think she has a photo grafic memory.......when people in town hear her speak, they are blown away that she just turned 2 in december....people would get a kick out of her back in oct when she would "pretend" to be a baby with the play crying....a baby pretending to be a baby is about the cutest....she has a sister who is 5 and a brother 4...they are smart too...but she seems to be a little bit different....not sure what to think

Lourisia - posted on 02/23/2010

We all know that our child is a gift.But you will know if your child is gifted when you see some thing in them that other kid's can not do like my son Kish started reading a 2

Rebekah - posted on 02/23/2010

Thanks Sheila,
You bring up another good point about IQ testing. Because IQ testing is most accurate around 7-8 years, many schools choose not to test until that point, which is around third grade. I think for some people this supports the "evening out" theory. I know many people are frustrated with the current system because some children who are not identified for special instruction before third grade will already encounter behavioral or social issues, or will have learned that school is not a place to learn or be challenged before they reach that point. Although this obviously doesn't change their IQ, it does effect who is selected for screening by teachers, and can create habits that are hard to undo. This is why so many of us find ourselves in the position of advocating for the education of our younger gifted children, exploring what options we may have within our public school systems or elsewhere, and supporting each other in forums like this.
Welcome to the group!

Sheila - posted on 02/22/2010

Rebekah,
I am new and have just read your post. I completely agree with what you wrote. I am the mom of an 18 year old gifted daughter who tests in the very superior range and am also a special education teacher. In our district we do not screen for gifted until third grade because of students evening out and because IQ scores are difficult to evaluate until this age range. After third grade, most IQ's will have very little fluctuation throughout a student's life. We have many students who do well in the early grades because they have been fortunate to have been worked with at home and are very well prepared for school. However, that does not indicate giftedness. We have also seen students who have never been read to at home test out with very high IQ's. What we usually look for in screenings are not only classroom test scores, but also a student's ability to learn with little instruction such as learning to read "out of the blue" or being able to figure out higher level math problems without being taught the process. We also do not allow student's to skip grades anymore. Instead we do enrichment. Our daughter was four when she started school and in elementary school she was always academically ready but not always emotionally and socially ready to be with children older than her. Thankfully, this discrepancy evened out around sixth grade.

Charra - posted on 02/09/2010

Wow, I just had to stop, and think, you are going through the same exact thing as I an going through with my son. I dont know what the cut off is for being " Gifted" but my son also was speaking fluently by 12 months, he never really had much of a baby stage. He just started to talk, and is very very logical. He is great at reading, and math, and is always wanting to learn more. I show him something once or twice, and he understands it, and then wants more.... My boy is five years old, and it is difficult to try making decissions for him academically because though he is extreamlly bright, he is still very average emotionally, so trying to ballance that can be a challenge for you too. Again, Im glad to see your post, hope you find some answers to your question, though because she sounds gifted to me=)

Shana - posted on 02/06/2010

Gifted children exhibit many similar characteristics besides just learning topics quickly and before their peers in age. They are usually perfectionistic and may not want to try new things because they only want to do well at the things they do. They are also characterized by being intelligent, but also usually have emotional and social issues that need to be addressed just as much as the academics. Around 4 years old or after, have your child tested by a person trained to administer an IQ test to gifted children. The test covers many areas and you'll have a much better indication of where on the scale (not just overall IQ number) your child is and what to do about it. Gifted children are challenging, but amazing too! I have two of them!

Julie - posted on 02/03/2010

I've never met a highly gifted kid that did not have a problem with writing. That seems to be an issue across the board. There is a certain statistical criteria for determining highly gifted (IQ that is), but a more generic criteria is being at least two years ahead academically. Personally, I would say, with groups like this it's really probably a matter of what your parenting needs are. Highly gifted kids present a unique set of parenting needs, and that can be stressful and exhausting. They wear you out with endless questions, are very intense, have deep emotions, can argue logically about why the rules should be changed, etc., and it is hard to channel their need for academic stimulation. Also, there's often a big discrepancy between their cognitive ability and say their physical, social, or emotional ability. So, my opinion, if you find you need support for these kinds of issues or need a place where people won't judge you for talking about what your kid is doing, then this is a good place for that.

Laura - posted on 12/29/2009

the way we figured our child was gifted is that the teachers (p-k) kept telling us he was and we also noticed that he seemed to catch onto things quickly. We never pushed him to do anything just answered his questions as we went. There is some indication that our 2nd one (5) is also gifted, but he is more laid back. Our first is strong willed. He went on a 40 hour hunger strike because he did not want to move from CA to KS. he wasn't even 5 yet. He is now 8. I think sometimes when a child learns things is also dependent on their personality. My 5 year old is learning to read now where his brother learned earlier. Just my thoughts and observations. Also, my brother was gifted and skipped a grade. He said he HATED IT. the reason was he was not emotionally ready for the higher grade and did not have the social or emotional experience that the older kids did. my opinion is that the kids need to be kids. We do not make a point of telling my oldest he is gifted. He does not need his head anymore swollen than it is already. He is 8 going on 16 the way he talks and behaves. I have rammbled on this sorry, but I am so excited to finally find a group I can be a normal mom in.

Kylie - posted on 12/28/2009

I just wanted to respond to Rebekah's point re: children evening out by 3rd grade. My daughter is entering 4th grade this year and in Kindy there was a child who was considered the brightest in her year. She could read before school etc. due to her mother (who is a teacher) having taught her. My daughter taught herself to read, of which I was completely unaware, until the teacher kept insisting that she already knew how to read (I did not do anything academic with my children, except read to them so had no way of knowing).

She has continued to astound teachers and a constant comment is the unusual/creative way she approaches things and her wicked adult sense of humour. I am now friends with the "teacher mum" and her daughter has most definitely evened out. She is still bright and still taught at home by her mum but is certainly not at the same level as the "gifted" students at school - so it seems there is some validity in this statement.

I am not anti educating our children but from someone who does nothing academic with her children (unless asked) - although I do provide them with lots of extra curricular activities in the form of drama, art, music, dance, team sports etc - I believe that if they are gifted and NOT 2E then they will shine without any additional academic tuition from us as parents. Mind you in saying that my children are all VSLs so traditional academic work is torture to them (and me) anyway. I suppose my point is that childhood seems to be getting shorter and shorter and kids growing up sooo much faster that I think teaching them how to play is probably more important than everything else.

Sherika - posted on 12/24/2009

When they are tested and statistical data supports the theory.

Rebekah - posted on 12/21/2009

Quoting Temeka:

I noticed this question because I've read that their skills now are not indicative of their intelligence and have believed that to be FALSE! Can I say this without offending anyone?...I wonder if the "experts" do not want to discourage parents whose children are "normal". 

Temeka,

I just wanted to reply to this part of your question. One thing that you'll hear a lot is that "all children even out by 3rd grade", or, as you say, that early milestones don't necessarily indicate intelligence. There are two elements at play here. First, milestones are in given ranges for a reason. There are moms on here with kids that started talking at 6 months and kids that started talking at 18 months, but they end up within the same gifted range around age 2 or 3. I think you would find that probably most of our kids did do some things early, especially things like learning letters, numbers, etc. Or were especially attentive or inquisitive. But it's not a perfect correlation, which is why "experts" don't want to give any undue worry or stress when it's unwarranted. The second issue is that children whose parents push them to learn via constant instruction, flashcards, etc, can be perceived as more intelligent early on, but then do seem to "level out" in school when other children learn the things that the hothoused children had been taught earlier. This is not true of gifted children, who continue to learn above grade level throughout their schooling if given the opportunity. Unfortunately this is something that you will probably be  told over and over if you have a gifted child, because for some reason, some people will not want it to be true. 

Angela - posted on 12/21/2009

I used to post here quite a bit, but then got busy and haven't been here in awhile. My oldest will be 12 in a couple of weeks, and he is definitely gifted, though I don't know if he would be considered to be highly gifted. My youngest is incredible, however he is definitely special needs (he is 5). Trying to find support to figure out how to parent a highly gifted child (my 5 year old), I came across an article by Dabrowski. It helped me a ton, so now I've ordered one of his books. He divides gifted children into having various characteristics, and my oldest is almost entirely intellectual - no wonder he's so easy. My youngest is incredibly emotional, sensitive, and a bit sensual - of course that's going to be more complicated to handle. At least after reading that I have a better understanding of my child. I'm hoping that after reading the book I will be better at helping him when he's so frustrated from making a tiny mistake, or when he is so worried about something that most children (or adults) wouldn't even consider.



Anyway, I'll try to come around here more often. I think I'll be needing the support, and you are such a knowledgable group of women. I love that you understand that having gifted children isn't always easy. I love both of my boys so much, but my youngest one is so sensitive and emotional that I need some guidance on how to deal with him sometimes. His little brain is just working too fast, I think.

Melissa - posted on 12/21/2009

I am in the same boat with my 2 year old. She knows all her abc's and has been able to count past 10 since she was 18 months old. I am wondering where to go from here. My daughter has been using proper grammar for months now, and we have started using flash cards to teach her more. I am curious as to how to begin to teach her how to read. I really don't know if my child is gifted, or highly gifted or just smart, but I would like to give her every opportunity to excel.

Rebekah - posted on 12/18/2009

Your son is very similar to what my son did. Please do create your own post. I'll try to respond later. Right now I'm supposed to be doing my holiday baking. :)

Temeka - posted on 12/18/2009

I'm new top this site - just found the "Circle of Friends". I do believe my children to be extremely genius! Not only because I'm their mother, but wow! They're amazing.

I noticed this question because I've read that their skills now are not indicative of their intelligence and have believed that to be FALSE! Can I say this without offending anyone?...I wonder if the "experts" do not want to discourage parents whose children are "normal". I have 3 children and my second child has blown the roof off what I consider normal! He knew all his letters at 2 so I began teaching him the sounds, he mastered that and is 2 y 4m and can read! He basically taught himself to count (I don't remember doing it!)...he counts through all the teens 'til 20 and I guess I'll work on that now. He's ready for kindie! How can that be?! He has all the checklists mastered!

I wonder what to do! Work on his social skills so he can skip grades? do they do that!? I don't know what to do - I've been thinking about taking a trip to the elementary and finding out. He made need a special school...anyone know? maybe I'll post my own Q.

Then you have the next child in line behind him. Since working on his sounds of the letters she has learned them at 13 months old!! Wow...I'm blown away...At this rate, they'll pass my intelligence at, oh, 4! hahahaha!

Lisa - posted on 12/14/2009

I have been fortunate that my daughter who is very gifted has found friends that are also very gifted and I have become friends with the moms. So we are able to share our stories and questions with each other without sounding like we are bragging. It is very helpful to not feel alone. I think I have a good understanding of the differences between "gifted" and "not gifted" because we have 4 children and 1 is highly gifted with special ed needs, one is moderately gifted, one is bright and one we don't know yet (he is 2.5 but has known all the letters for a while and can count to 11) he is bright, but "gifted" I don't know yet. I can just see how my daughter who is very gifted thinks differently. She has a very creative and unique way of seeing connections in the world and describing them. So many times she will say something that seems totally out of nowhere but if we probe there is some amazing connection that she has described. It is so much fun sometimes, but she is very stubborn and independent-not so fun for a parent. :-) My other kids just don't get things the way she does, so I feel I have a pretty good understanding of the difference with gifted kids. I guess if you only have 1 child or don't have gifted & not-gifted kids at home, it would be hard to see the difference. I tend to think of "gifted" as a way of thinking/problem solving and how quickly they can master new concepts. This can be measured on IQ tests to gauge a number. It was much easier to believe our daughter was so gifted when we finally got her IQ number back and it was obvious based on that. Prior to that we were just wondering why she seemed so different. I am new to this group (but not to gifted issues) and look forward to exploring what this group has to offer. :-)

Rebekah - posted on 12/14/2009

I agree, thank you for the clarification. What I meant was that some people use the term gifted to include all children in the above average category, some use it exclusively to mean above 130 IQ, and some use it in an extremely general way. This group is definitely not restricted to the "highly gifted" or it would not have so many members, based purely on statistics. I actually often avoid using the term gifted to describe my son, partly due to the confusion. I'm also a stickler for semantics, though. :)

My son definitely falls in the category of special needs gifted (I like that phrase) and I think that's the most common (or at least most irritating to me) misperception about gifted kids, that they don't need anything extra or have special needs. That's why I was so relieved to find this group and the ability to share resources and ideas with other moms in the same situation.

Lisa - posted on 12/14/2009

Good resources Rebekah, thanks for including them. While I agree that all children are special and can accomplish their own special things with love and support, it is just a fact that not all children have exceptionally high intelligence, or giftedness. It may just be semantics but "gifted" children are special needs children who have unique characteristics that truly make it difficult for them to learn in a normal classroom, especially in K and 1st grade. And I don't agree that all children are special needs children. So all children are not giffted, but all children are special.

Rebekah - posted on 12/14/2009

There are several different definitions and uses of the term gifted. I think this forum tends to be inclusive of all gifted or otherwise exceptional children. Obviously, although we want to try, intelligence is hard to quantify and you could read several volumes on the subject of IQ testing itself. And when we're talking about young children, most of us have not tested to find an actual "number" for our children. That said, here is one breakdown of the levels of giftedness: http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/highly_prof...
and here is another explanation:
http://www.educationaloptions.com/resour...

Both websites, hoagiesgifted.org and educationaloptions.com are great resources for information about giftedness in general and I recommend checking them out if you are just beginning to find out about what "gifted" means to your child and your family.

Karla - posted on 12/13/2009

My Daughter start reading basic words at age 3.. and she also ask thing that sometimes you can't image how to answer it.... she's 6 now and in Grade 1.... consistent honor student as well, maybe that's how children now like... but for me every child is gifted in there own way... With the right love, care , and proper guidance, and you can raise a gifted child on your own way.... tccic muawwwhuzzzzz..

Lisa - posted on 12/13/2009

There is debate about "cutoff' points between gifted, highly gifted, exceptionally gifted, profoundly gifted, etc....Most use IQ scores as cutoffs, but those are also fluid and will change a bit over time for any particular child. I think of highly gifted as how quickly does the child acauire new material. Do they only need one exposure to a concept to master it, do they need 3 exposures, or the typical 8-10 of most average children? And how do they think and problem solve? Are they very good at logic/problem solving in creative and inventive ways? Our 6 yr. old daughter is higly gifted as she could read at 3, is incredibly imaginative/creative and could do multiplication & division problems at 4, but she hates writing too. Being gifted, even highly gifted does not mean gifted in everything. Your child does sound gifted to me as she has many early skills. I would recommend some testing (IQ and achievement) at some point just to get more information for you to make school decisions. Sounds like she has already mastered long ago most of what she will learn academically in K. :-)