this week

Margaret - posted on 07/03/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I actually want them to chop my legs off no iff's buts or maybe's I want them GONE!!!!

from the neck down preferably....

if I was a horse they would've shot me long ago....

had the physio pull me in a hundred different ways just after spending an entire day baking for my daughters birthday and then having to be up the entire day of her birthday due to visitors. THEN a low pressure system decided to take a nice slow week travelling over western victoria ....and now the endo is letting me know my period is coming soon just as the weather is beginning to pass....I just want to cry im not sure how long the pain has been at this level for im loosing track of days im not sure if it is one or three weeks all up now.....but I am sick and tired of being in soo much pain.

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Margaret - posted on 07/08/2009

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nah just the act of walking aggravates my back and swelling in various locations...its guarenteed that when I over do it I feel it...and yeah I have bad days anyway on top of it. I too try and get it done when im feeling good...but im not quite there yet still alot of pain but the painkillers are having an impact.

im glad you have found family support :) support particularly emotional support is very important....I think bruces usual winter depression is beginning to lift too....

his bipolar mood swings and the behaviour which sometimes results is a bit like water off a ducks back for me....I dont let it cloud things.

but last night he came into our room with my pain killers and nexium for me, and an iced coffee (ahuh yep im being spoilt) and a big bowl of Nachos for me to munch on while I watched the movies....and he was coming and going for alot of cuddles and things and then he said...I dont care what it takes but im going to fix it I am going to fix everything....

apparently the amount of pain iv been in has been upsetting him and he thinks something is wrong with our relationship.....but as I said earlier his bipolar swings are an illness I understand that I dont let it get to me.

but I gave him a cuddle went along with it...I dont mind being spoilt on occasion :D

Christine - posted on 07/08/2009

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i find that sometimes on days when i feel good, i will work as hard as i can regardless of the fact that they tell you not to overdue it because you will pay for it the next day, because i have found that sometimes even if i don't over do it on a good day, i might feel crappy the next day anyway.



glad you're starting to come out the "other side". i'm still darn impressed with the party you did, too.



i was sitting outside the other day talking on my cell phone to my sister for quite awhile without any problem----when a storm blew in. the winds and clouds came in and i heard thunder----and i had a grand headache set in pretty fast after that and battled it for most of the eveneing.



our weather has been stabilizing a little more, but i seem to be having more headaches than usual, but, our family is also going through some pretty bad stress right now. between my husband's injury, jobloss, and surgery, my multiple times of bloodwork, dealing with a disagreement with my 2 oldest living sisters over my mother's mental status and and getting a very nasty email from one of them. i have leaned on my mother so much for emotional support the last year and a half, but she has gone out of state with one sister to give the other sister a break, but i don't think she is coming back to stay and i'm really sad about that. i'm waiting so se what more the blood work and the MRI will show.........i was up until after 5 am the other night crying. if i can keep the right meds in me i can keep from crying and even get a smile on my face. one real blessing to me has been connecting with a sister that i really have not had much of a relationship with over the years and discovering that she is compassionate and understanding and has really helped me with the issue with my sisters and my mother. she has really been there to let me lean on her and i am suddenly in awe of her. shouldn't let myself get out of contact with family again.

Margaret - posted on 07/07/2009

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YAY i think maybe *crosses fingers* *touches wood* I think we are coming out the other side again my pain killers are working, but im being careful to not over do it at the moment because if I over do it its just going to knock me for a six and take too long to get back on my feet again at the moment... its still cold, but the weather is relieving a bit on severity....I just hope we dont have another weather system like that come through any time soon.....

I did my rehab homework yesterday I have my appointment again tomorrow.....the homework was to use their books and formulaes to figure out what work I can do with a little retraining....the 3 main ones which popped up were psychology, counselling and social worker.... so will see what she does with those options...and I should be well prepared this time...I finally found my resume which she has been asking for for weeks....at least we wont have to write it up from scratch again having to remember everything iv done. we have all the information in it we need.

Margaret - posted on 07/04/2009

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there are pain types you should and can work through and pain types which should tell you your activities are damaging your body :S

having lived most of my life with endomitriosis I was accustomed to the pain type which is to be worked through and isnt damaging the body....however this pain type has led to the damaging pain type and for a very long time masked the damaging pain....realistically when I feel the sciatica and back pain I am supposed to lay down and let the swelling reduce.....
but thats actually not an easy thing to do....

Margaret - posted on 07/04/2009

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yep I did....I do many stupid things like that knowing how much it will hurt later and how much it hurts doing it...my arms caned with all the beating I have put in an order to the family for a stand up electric mixer for my birthday :p

one of the hardest things since my body hit the downhill slope has been stopping myself from doing these things...I cant I dont know if it is stupidity or pride....but I do it and regret it later...but it was worth it she really enjoyed her birthday she had a dora and boots heart shaped cake, cup cakes, fairy cakes, ginger bread men and heaps of fairy bread ....the usual 5 yo girls birthday menu line up.

Christine - posted on 07/03/2009

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go ahead and cry----it will at least release a little tension maybe. i am so sorry you feel so lousy.



we've been having so many storms come and go and the pressure changes just about do me in some days. we have an old woodburning stove that needs replaced and sometimes i can smell the weather change even before i feel it because the inversion causes the smoke smell to come into my house---which makes me sick.



i am really impressed that you BAKED for a whole day---wow!!!

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