Daughter cries every morning at school... wants to stay in my class.....I am also 5 months pregnant....

Morgan - posted on 04/15/2009

I experienced the same situation when I had to bring my children to the daycare that I work that. I was very blessed to be able to stay at home with my twins the first year that they were born but things happened and I had to find a job. My children didn't start coming to the daycare until they were two. They stayed at home with my mom and due to health issues after I had my third child she couldn't watch them anymore so my solution was bring them with me. At first they were like hummm these kids are ok. We are watching tv my mommy is here and everything is good. Well once class time happened all I could hear is them crying the entire time almost!! It was heart breaking!!! The day care that I work at is kinda small so the classrooms are right next to each other. I even had to lower my voice while I was teaching so they couldn't hear me as well! (Let me tell ya someone who has a loud voice natually that isn't easy to do!!!!!!) Their teacher was a big help since she is an older lady and treats all her two year olds like they were her own grandkids. When she would have to change all of the kids my two would sneak into my classroom just to see me and then I would give them a kiss and a hug and sometimes if I had some candy I would give them a piece. They did ok with that until they had to go back to their class. Now they have been there for about 3 months and when its time for the two year olds to go to class they scream bye to everyone in the room and now I have to make them give me a kiss and a hug b/c half of the time the would rather go into their class and just say bye to me. It is hard but just try to keep on working with her. My kids weren't sure what to think of when I was pregnant. They were just like baby? My boy bacame jealous after she was born but my girl thought that she was her baby and it was really cute!! I hope that things get better and school for you and your daughter b/c it can be kinda hard to hear them cry. I also hope that the rest of your pregnancy goes good for you as well!! Good Luck!!

Stephanie - posted on 04/15/2009

Last year, I taught a thrid grader with severe stress issues.  He would make himself sick in the classroom and always asked to go home.  Mornings were the worst.  First, we had 2 of his friends meet him at the carpool line to walk with him to the classroom.  Then, we made a deal that he could call his mother during lunch (so it didn't interfere with class time and he got through the morning--his toughest time).  But, I never brought it up and always waited for him to ask me on the way to lunch.  Eventually, he forgot to ask (especailly with all of the social excitement of lunch time) and the calls stopped.   

Maybe you could try something like this with your daughter?  Friend chaperones would probably be pretty easy to arrange and would quickly change her mindset.  I'm not sure how tthe phone call would work with your schedules, but it would limit the time frame that she could contact you and she wouldn't be physically going to your classroom.

Julie - posted on 04/11/2009

thanks for the reply..... i thought it was brought on by the pregnancy but was not sure...  also at the beginning of the year she would not ask about me at recess... she would play with her friends... now... she waits for me to come and see her.... and she wants to stay with me the whole recess...  and if i dont come she starts to cry..... she waits for me on the wall or near the stairs.... i have noticed that she is not playing with her friends any more... because she is always waiting for me to come and see her.....  i think i am going to tell her teacher to not allow her to come to my class anymore....  during class...  we will see....  i hope that she stops being jealous and always wants to stay with me.....  and at home we are never talking about the baby...  we are always telling her that we love her and we play with her....  we tell her that she is going to have a baby sister and that she is going to be the best big sister in the world....  and she always asks when the baby is coming so she can play with her... she also says that she loves the baby and cant wait for the baby to come..... we also tell her that her sister loves her very much and that she is going to bring her a big gift when she comes....  i don't know... we are trying not to make her feel jealous....  i don;t know what more we could do... and she tells us that she wants the baby to sleep in her room.....  and she wants to change and dress and feed the baby.....  she seems excited to have a sister but i dont know....

Barbara - posted on 04/11/2009

Yep, definitely a stage brought on by the pregnancy.  What if you weren't teaching there?  They would not let her wander home to tell mom something.  You, she and her teachers need to have a conference.  Set rules and  boundaries.  Reassure her you love her, but teaching is your job and goign to school is hers and you are eager to hear all about her day at the end.  Be loving and firm, and get her teachers to back you up just as if you didn't work there.  I've been in this same situation and it's frustrating.  She will adjust faster if she isn't able to keep going back to your classroom.