i am having a baby again as some of u will already know i had a baby girl who was a month old when she died and i really miss her we had a song at her funeral and i have it on my phone and feel really silly. i am just worried my next baby has something wrong with it

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It's understandable that you have those fears. Chances are that your baby is fine and healthy, but it's also likely that it will take awhile for them to diminish and that they will come back if you have another baby, even if this one is healthy. Try not to worry too much. And it's not silly to have a song that has such meaning to you. If it helps you to hear it, keep it around for as long as you need to. I wish all the best for you and your baby.

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Vanessa - posted on 05/19/2009

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You are such a strong person, and I'm sure god has a plan for you little girl and she will make sure her little brother or sister comes out fine, and it is not silly to have a song played in memory of her on you phone, if anything it shows how much you love her and want to always remember her and how wonderful of a mother you are going to be! hang in there itwill all be ok God never gives you more than you can handle!

Chelsy - posted on 05/18/2009

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I think that is total normal feeling after any loss of a child (miscarriage or still born or awhile after birth). I hope you have a different doctor with this one. And just out of curiosuty(sp) why did they deliever her vaginally if she was breech?? My daughter was breech and was a c-section. Anyhow everything you are feeling the worry the what if is completly normal and if you didn't feel that why then i would be worried. I think this baby will be find. Like a mom said on another chat site i'm on. Her second son was a gift from her first son that she lost. And also make sure that your new baby knows about his/her older sister. She may have only been with you for a month but she is still your child no matter what. feel free to send me a message if you want. i'm always willing to talk about anything you want. God Bless and Congrats on your new little one.

User - posted on 05/18/2009

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I know how you feel my son only lived 3 days and it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. If it makes you feel better to hear the song played at her funeral then you shouldn't feel silly. It has been 5 years now since my son passed and I still think about him and miss him everyday. I have had 2 children since who were both happy and healthy but I was scared the entire time I was pregnant with them both! But remember God doesn't give you more than you can handle. I hope the best for you and your family. God Bless

Karla - posted on 05/18/2009

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Hi Samantha,

My deepest condolences and sympathy to you and your family! A good friend of mine lost her baby girl at 76 days old and a few months later she was pregnant again. I am happy to report that baby Keilan is a healthy 14 month old baby girl now. Although we miss baby Keira, she was an angel sent from heaven as I'm sure your baby girl was as well! I'm sure your baby angel is going to be watching over her baby sister or brother in your womb! I will be praying for you and your health! Take care. : )

Debbie - posted on 05/18/2009

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My son is in heaven as well. I went to Dr.'s ppt 3 weeks before he was due and they said there was no heartbeat. I had to go to the hospital and be induced to deliver him vaginally also. Burying your own child is one of the hardest thing you have to do as a mother. I miss him terribly now, but I still make him part of my life. I tell him good nite everynight. and I know he is my angel. I had gotten prego within 2 months of loosing him. My daughter Jocelyn is 10mths younger than he is. And she an I both almost dies during delivery. I thank my son and my wonderful Dr. for keeping us safe. I know it is scary but you do have to have faith. Enjoy every moment of being prego. Good luck!

Kelly - posted on 05/18/2009

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I lost my first daughter when she was 4wks old to SIDS and funnily enough I have the song we played at her funeral on my phone. I fell pregnant with my second daughter 9months after my eldest died and all the way through I was convinced I was goin to lose her even after she was born.. I seeked concellin and had loads of support from my family and friends who got me through. My yougest daughter is now 10 months and a happy, very vocal little girl.

Pat - posted on 05/13/2009

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hi sam,Im sorry to hear that,no its not silly at all,just try and think postive,I do know how you feel,I had a eptic last year and I was upset to but I lost mine at 6 weeks pregant and I think about it all the time,if you want to talk either here or on facebook I will be more then happy to listen pat x

Vickie - posted on 05/13/2009

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My son Michale had a blood vesal that ruptured into his brain and I had to make a decision whether to keep him on life support or take him off it was a very hard decision that I had to make and I even blamed myself for his death for the longest time......As for my new twins Nycholas was 4lbs 12 oz and Trynt was 4lbs 13oz they are still an ounce apart now they are Nycholas 9lbs 9oz and Trynt 9lbs 10oz and that was at the last doc visit they are now a little more than a new born size they are in size 1 diapers and can still fit into some newborn clothes they are truely a blessing for our family and my daughter loves them to death she doesn't leave them alone not eve when they are sleeping we are blessed. I hope and pray that you are doing well and that your pregnancy goes fine. God Bless, Vickie

Amanda - posted on 05/12/2009

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It's natural to be nervous. I had a really great pregnancy will my first, and with my second we almost lost him. First it was heavy bleeding then preeclampsia, then in labor the cord became wrapped around his neck... So I understand, But being afraid is not going to keep me from having another child. I just pray to god that things will be better this time, and you should simpley have faith.. Good Luck.. I have a 7 yr old, and a 7 month old.. lol =)

Samantha - posted on 05/12/2009

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she died of a brain hem hun she was born breech and they delivered her vaginally which is totally wrong

Vickie - posted on 05/11/2009

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I went through the same thing whe I found out that I was prego again as well.... My daughter Lizzy is 15 months old she was a twin her brother past a way shortly after birth and then when my daughter was about 51/2 months my husband and I found out we were expecting a new baby I had many mixed feelings about it I wondered if this baby would replace my little Michale or if this one would pass a way too it was a very trying time for me then right before christmas we found out that not only were we having 1 baby but we were having another set of twins so this increased my fears. What I am tryind to say is that it is completely normal to have the feelings that you have, but you have to also relize that things happen for a reason we may not know why they happen but God does and he has a plan already set in motion you just have to ask him to give you the stength to go on and he will. Don't get me wrong your new baby will not relace your daughter but it can bring you even greater joy cause now you know how valuble our children are and your new baby will be that much more valuble to you. You just need to hang in there and have faith that God will make everything better this time around I hope that this makes you feel a little better and know that I am here if you ever need to talk I knkow how you feel I have been. I will keep you in my prayers. Congrats and good luck on your new bundle of Joy, Vickie

Natalie - posted on 05/11/2009

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what did she die from? If it was SIDS there is really nothing you can do! Just learn from the experience that you had with her and hopefully the same things dont occur again!

Abby - posted on 05/11/2009

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im sure everything will be fine. every mother's worst fear is losing a child. ul never forget ur baby, but you're lucky to be having another little one. good luck, and try to enjoy being pregnant as much as possible.

let us know when ur bundle of joy arrives xxx

Vicki - posted on 05/11/2009

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Am sooo sorry for ur lost i cant imagne wot ur going threw.My mum had twin boys 27 years ago and one of them died at 2 days old.Yea u must be going threw hell thinking that there is sommat wrong wif this baby,but try not to just enjoy the pregnancy and look forward to the birth of ur new baby and enjoy every moment of it.Good luck.xx

Gemma - posted on 05/11/2009

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I have got a 14 month old son Madison and have not suffered the loss of a child. Thank god. I'm sure this new baby will be fine you need to enjoy the rest of your pregnancy and your new baby when he/she is born. Good Luck and enjoy

Meghann - posted on 05/11/2009

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I also lost a baby at 6 weeks old (Connor). He was a twin and his brother, Hunter, is now a happy, healthy 11 month old. Even scarier, I quickly got pregnant and gave birth 3 weeks ago to another boy (Logan). (He was actually 8 weeks premature, and the twins were 15 weeks premature which is what caused some of Connor's health issues.) Anyway, I completely understand how you feel. Every time the NICU calls I panic thinking they are going to say something is wrong with Logan. (The day Connor passed away the NICU called me at work saying I needed to come in and speak with the DR because something was wrong...I dread seeing the NICU phone number on my caller ID.) The Dr's and nurses in the NICU understand what a fragile situation it is for us and are wonderful. The best advice I could give you is to just enjoy your pregnancy and relax. Try to think positively about this new miracle you have been blessed with. Just because it happened once, doesn't mean it'll happen again. And if something should happen, heaven forbid, know that God has a bigger plan for us. What has gotten me through this tough time since Connor has been gone is knowing that God had a bigger plan for Connor that I could have ever imagined and that He must have needed Connor in Heaven with him more than I needed him here with me. We also have a song for Connor and every time I hear it I sob. It's all part of the healing process. Good Luck and best wishes to you and your baby!

Ebony - posted on 05/11/2009

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It's completely normal for u to feel that way. Cause everytime after the lost of my baby I think something is wrong with my baby. Just have faith and pray about and don't stress ur self out about it. But, my people always tell me things happen for a reason. Godd had something planned for the baby.

Jennifer - posted on 05/11/2009

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Losing a baby is the hardest thing imaginable, we lost my sister when she was 4 months old due to SIDS. It is something hard and as a sister I still think about her and how things may have been had they been different. Things, even sad things, happen for a reason but know that your baby is in a good place. My mom still to this day wears her angel necklace that she was given when my sister died 20 years ago. Keep that song for as long as you need, it's not silly, it is understable and I'm sure helps you through hard times. My mom was only going to have two kids and although I am still very sad that I lost my sister I am so glad we have my brother. He is one of my best friends and I could also not imagine life without him. Cherish all the pictures you have of your little girl and try not to worry so much about your baby to be every child is different. Your little one on the way I know will be pampered and loved very much! I wish you the very best.

Becky - posted on 05/11/2009

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That is just a natural reaction and very understandable. I have had many miscarriages and when i fell pregnant with my daughter i just assumed i would miscarry, when i made it to 12 weeks i still thought something would go wrong. When i had her and they put her in my arms i closed my eyes for a second as worried they would tell me she had gone. She hadn't she is now a full of life 3 year old. So i assumed when i fell pregnant again i would be ok but the same fears appeared again.
Losing a child is the worst thing anyone can go through.
Stay as positive as you can and care for yourself
xx

Emily - posted on 05/11/2009

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I think it's completely normal and understandable for you to have concerns about the health of your new baby given your past circumstances. All you can do is do your best at thinking positive and have a little faith. Although it doesn't make sense most of the time how and why certain things happen in life, I do believe there is a reason and purpose for everything. Hang in there and I wish you all the best. ~Emily, mommy of 2 girls 4 1/2 years & 17 mos~

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