10 Questions you should never ask a woman

Katherine - posted on 04/30/2012 ( 17 moms have responded )

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1. How much did that cost?



When your friend turns up wearing a ring with a rock the size of a golf ball, the last question you should ask is the first one that's on your mind. It's never polite to ask how much something cost, particularly if it looks like it was expensive.



2. OMG, did you get breast implants?



Plastic surgery is a very personal matter, and if your friend wants you to know what she's had done, she'll tell you. Otherwise, keep your speculation to yourself.



3. Is that a spray tan?



Well let's hope so! Tanning bed tans and sun tans are just a bad idea. Still, no one wants to admit that she got naked and sprayed down with chemicals in order to get that golden(ish) glow. Don't ask.



More from The Stir: 5 Beauty Secrets From Older Celebs Who Look Amazingly Youthful



4. Are you wearing false eyelashes?



False eyelashes are huge right now, but that doesn't mean it's a good idea to ask a woman if she's wearing them. And why are you so nosy, anyway?



5. Is that a wig?



Probably. But what business is it of yours? If you ask a woman this question, she'll be worried about her faux hair for the rest of the night.



6. Have you gained weight?



Come on, now. You KNOW better than to ask this question. And yet I think all of us have been asked it at one time or another. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!



7. Did you get that at [insert name of cheapest, tackiest clothing store in town here]?



Are you trying to make me punch you?



8. What size are you?



This is another highly personal question for just about any woman over size two. Most of us hate our dress size, or at least wish we could be down one or two more, and the last thing we want to do is compare ours with others.



9. Is that a fake?



If you're asking the receptionist at the oil change place about her 'Chanel' bag, then come on. You already know the answer -- you're just torturing her. It's safe to say that most of the designer sunglasses, bags, and watches you see around town are fakes. There's really no need to confirm it unless you're a customs officer.



10. Is that your real eye color?



Seriously, why do you need to know? Lots of people get tinted contacts. Few want to admit to it.





Do you have any to add?





I do: Are you pregnant? NO!!!! I have a fucking gut!

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17 Comments

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Jakki - posted on 05/16/2012

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A friend of mine was about 43 when she had her 3rd child - and frankly she did look older than that. She's normally a midwife who looks after premmie babies, and a few weeks after her baby was born she went back to work to see her old colleagues. She was sitting BREASTFEEDING in a nearby cafe when another hospital worker she knew came in, looked at her incredulously and said "is that baby YOURS???" in a loud voice. She looked up and said "no I just picked him up from the nursery!" which I think was a great response.

Stifler's - posted on 05/15/2012

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BHAHAHA all these sound like questions I'd ask for a joke esp. the 'have you gained weight" one. I always seem to want to ask people how long they have to go but only if they are obviously pregnant

Teresa - posted on 05/14/2012

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I once asked this lady who had a protuding belly n a really skinny body when she was due, and she proceeded to tell me that she had stomach cancer and there was no more the dr.s could do. DId that stop me?NO. Several years later at my sons dance troupe I asked a mother when she was due. He had been born 15 months ago but that's alright because we hadn't spoken in about 2 WEEKS! She so let me off the hook having a newborn myself after complications and in nursing school. Sweet woman, i sent her flowers!

Medic - posted on 05/05/2012

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Are they BOTH yours? .......hell no...it was a two for one deal at Costco......WTF really?!?!

[deleted account]

Oh, I forgot about people asking if J was mine. I'm Native American--black hair, dark brown eyes, and while I'm not as dark skinned as most, I look like I tan well--and J has bright red hair, light blue eyes, and very pale, almost blueish skin. He is VERY beautiful, so on one hand, I do understand, but he does have my bone structure, and his eyes are shaped just like mine....*I* can see the similarity just fine.

Corinne - posted on 05/01/2012

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Ha! I went to pick my daughter up after a school trip last night and one of the teachers asked if she was mine. He said 'I just wondered, cause your hair's different' Um.... yeah. She's blonde, mine's purple?! This guy's a teacher......

[deleted account]

Amanda, i'm surprised i haven't been asked that question yet. i have dark brown hair and dark green eyes, and my daughter is a little cotton-top with bright blue eyes. looks nothing like me, everything like her dad. they lied to me in biology, said that blonde hair and blue eyes were recessive traits. recessive my ass.

Firebird - posted on 04/30/2012

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lol Someone asked me if my daughter was mine once... years ago before she even learned to walk. I told them "Nope she just followed me home one day, I fed her since she looked hungry, and she's been bugging me ever since."

Amanda - posted on 04/30/2012

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It's normally followed by them saying, oh, but she's blonde. Like I hadn't noticed.
Maybe next someone asks I'll say no she's not I don't know who she belongs to.

Firebird - posted on 04/30/2012

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Actually people ask me all the time if I wear coloured contacts. I take it as a compliment, because the reason is always the same. My eyes are so awesome and bright, that people can't believe they're real. lol And I've got one friend who is colour blind, he can't see that my eyes are blue, so he had to ask me what colour they are.

But the rest of those are really ignorant questions, and I'd probably knock someone out for asking any of them.

[deleted account]

dood anybody who'd ask these questions is 1) a total asshole and 2) really fucking stupid. also extremely nosy, cuz it's totally someone's business if your eyes are really that color, wtf...



i really can't say anybody's asked me a stupid question like these, except what size my boobs were. seriously? and it was another chick, why on earth would anyone else care??



maybe i have a "fuck you" look frozen on my face, but people don't usually bother me with this kind of stuff xD

[deleted account]

lol! My husband & I were on a weekend motorcycle trip with one of my best girlfriends & her newish boy friend. I don't remember how it came up, but at dinner the newish boy friend asked me point blank if my breasts were real! My breasts are a smallish C if that, but I was wearing a really awesome shirt that makes them look great (but not THAT great!). I spent the whole rest of the evening self conscious about my boobs, then bought a baggy tee to wear the next day.

Then, at dinner the next night, he said, "You are REALLY hot, but not as hot as Sherry (my friend). Do you know how hot you are? Now compare that to Sherry." How do you take that?

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