Rae - posted on 03/31/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )
I am a sahm, I choose to be a sahm before me and my children lost ours minds. Which is another very long story.
Anyway how do i deal with this situation? My sons' friend has Adhd just like mine (Adhd, odd and speech delay) so its not that im not used to spirited kids. Im just so fed up with him coming round, he is very rude, sneaky, a thief and a constant attention seeker. If I try to say we dont behaviour like that or can u stop that please, he just goes right ahead and does it more. I actually raised my voice and thats when he doesnt say a word, its only because my three and him were fighting in the back of the car that i shouted at them all. Is this the only way to get through to him, i hope not. I feel for this kid, he hasnt had the best start to life, but he is driving me crazy, then I feel guilty because my son really likes him and he doesnt have many friends. What do i do, stop him coming round? Tell his parents? - he will just be even more trouble. I believe if a kid is always in trouble, always has things taken off them, always shouted at they become tolerant to it, And gives up trying to do the right thing? what do you guys think i should do about the friend? how do i help him become nicer?
i have given his step mum, the numbers for counsellors, psychs, pediatricians but she does nothing, instead she moans at me, this is problem number 2, his mum moans at me for whatever her step son gets up to and how my son is awesome trust me he's not, no where near it, she just doesnt see what actually goes on 24/7 but its taken alot of specialists, behaviour programs and listening, to get him where he is, plus the biggest one is my son cooperrating, im not blowing my own trumpet but some of the stuff my son did made me realise i need professional help for him and me before my own diagnosed depression swallowed me. So i got the help, we need i wasnt a sahm when i started this, i worked 24/7 roster She also whines that I have more time than her so i can do more (she has a hubby and the whole of her immediate family within15 minutes of her,all mine are over24hrs flying away) and tell mes how she doesnt want him (kid) living with her, his bio dad and their baby, in their new house. How she is great because she's doing 4 eves shift and 3 nights and how she is buying this and this, at first i dont really care what ppl do or how spend their money, im not jealous but a voice inside my head wants me to say "SHUT THE F&^%$ up" but i say thats really great, i admire you for doing all those shifts and yes you will be able to buy XYZ. So what do i do, how can i help her to help him, (kid) is there a way to tackle this situation so everyone is happy so everyone has less stress in their lives, I cant do anymore to help my son friend, i cant take him to these appointments and programs which im sure would be able to help. I asked his step nanna about if she contracted anyone yet, she said no so I cant say anymore but its driving me nuts im sure someone professional can help him, help them to become more of a family, I just feel that left to his own, this kid will end up how my nightmares visioned my own son. ok alittle dramatic :)