Help! I think a kid in my care might have Autism!

Greer - posted on 04/27/2010

Hi I'm not a care provider...I'm a mum and I see day care as school for very young children I started my girl in march at just over 12 months, unfortunately I have had to pull her 2 days a week as the job that I was supose to have steady hours with has not been so steady, We decided to put her in day care to challenge her as many people had commented on how advanced she was....but my husband and I are wondering if is lacking something. how do bring up with the carer that i know what she is good at, but what does she need help with

Louise - posted on 02/24/2010

I am going through the same situation as you. I however am VERY familuar with Autism/Asperger Syndrome as I have an Autistic Brother.

What I had started out doing is giving mom and dad spacific homework assignments to help in his development and delays. I have 3 other children here with in weeks apart in age and have a basis to compair to with mom. I let her know EVERYTHING but coloured a bit like roses so she doesn't get offended or feel like I am attacking her son or singling him out.

I will first approach her with an antidote of his day or a REAL positive (sometime exsagerated enthusiasim) situation that happened to T or a great accomplishment...ect, ect. Then I will address what we REALLY need to work on. I will let her know that all 3 of the other children (his age) can put on their boots and jacket which they parents CLEARY know that T is no where near that point. So this is when I focus on the homework task....What I need you to do at home is have him lead putting his foot in his boot and arm in his jacket. Even if this means you need to start the process 15 minutes earlier DO NOT do it for him. Just keep getting his attention at the task at hand and be consistant and diligent. I tell her he needs this important developmental skills to be successful in school.

Right now I am looking for a great evaluations sheet that I can fill out and send home monthly or semi-montly. This way I can check off his strengths...weaknesses and suggest talking to the doctor about particular issues and delays. I am looking for an evaluation that give a good summary of what we should be expecting by certain ages and stages....I KNOW one exsists...I might just have to make one myself :)

If you know anything about Autism know, children with Autism are EXTREMELY smart!! And I discribe this child in my care beyond his age in brain however he doesn't have the capablity to focus beyond his own world to apply it.

ANY family doctor can preform a Developmental Screening. I will suggest this after my first evaluation that I send home with him (and all the other children). This way I make it protical and part of my dc program.

Louise

Michelle - posted on 01/20/2010

Thank you all so much for your advice! I know something needs to be said to his parents, so I'm going to take your input and figure out the best way to approach the situation.

I really like the newsletter to the parents idea. That way I can hand it out to all the parents and not look like I am singling him out. Does anyone know of any good websites that give age appropriate developmental checklists?

Cynthia- Do you know how I can find one of those workshop providers in my area that you speak of?

Thanks again ladies :)

Peita - posted on 01/15/2010

There are ways around things if you don't want to talk about it directly with the parents, I quite often do newsletters or parent packs about different early childhood challenges! I have worked with 5 children who were eventually diagnosed as either Autistic or Aspegers! I picked it in these children when they were about 18 months old, but they weren't diagnosed until they were 4 and 4 1/2 yo! Parents never want to admit that there is something different about their child, do just be very gentle with them in your approach! I have a family member I desperately want to get checked out, but his parents won't do anything even when there are several different childcare workers asking them to, he's fine in their eyes!!! Maybe give the parents written observations and developmental checklists now and then in 6 months that you have completed, I know that is a long time, but then you will have it on paper and if there is no improvementin his development, let them know what you are thinking and have support resources eg. health clinics or doctors numbers ready to show that you are serious and really want to help! Let them know that school days will be here before they know it and your just making sure everything is on track! It is a really hard thingg to bring up with parents, like I said, I've been there 5 times! Good luck with it all!

Cynthia - posted on 01/13/2010

Hi Michelle,



Most likely your observations are correct how I would go about it is to have a parent workshop at your daycare with the subject being stages of development and then have the faciliator target normal development and developmental delays. Hope this helps. I do parenting children with special needs workshops and alot of daycare book them .

Michele - posted on 01/12/2010

Hi Michele,
As a child care provider and owner of a child care center I would recommend you
share this information with the parents. You can do the ground work, by getting them the tel. no. to their school district and finding out what the requirements are needed
for an asssessment. Also, do some observations of the child and review developmental
appropriate behaviors for a child who is 21/2. Then share this with the parents.
I found some children do develop slower then others, but as a caregiver you know
when something is different. Just remember, parents have egos (smile) and don't want
to think their child may be different. Give them time but be consistant, the child may need help now. In NY state, 0-3 is the best time for early intervention!
Good Luck
Michele, www.myhqr.com

Sarah - posted on 01/11/2010

I have a now 3 yr old boy( turned 3 in Nov.) that I felt the same way with. I started noticing differences when he was 2. I also have a 3 yr old girl that is only 3 weeks younger than the boy. I started noticing that the boy could not finish any of his words. When I tried to work with him he would only make a "unnn" sound and could not get it. At first I just figured he was a boy and it will come. As time went on though he was not getting it. He also has a VERY hard time chewing with his mouth closed (which I found out could be an indication to hearing loss). That made sense to me since the ending of all his words he could not get and it seemed like his understanding of things was also lacking. Parents had already mentioned that at birth his one ear they could not get a reading on. The parents were noticing the differences in speech between the boy and girl (at my house), so one time when we were talking I mentioned that it might be good to have his hearing tested. I mentioned about AEA (area education agency) they do testing for free and also do a full evalution so if it was not hearing they would test other areas. They decided to go with the doctor that did the hearing test when he was a baby. That doc. could not get a reading so referred him to a specialist. That specialist said his hearing was fine and (as some have said to you) that boys sometimes are slower at speech. By this time I knew it was not just that. He was almost three at this time and was not understanding colors and had a hard time answering simple yes/no questions. He does a lot of copy play, but has good eye contact and likes to interact. He also does not focus on one item like autistic kids do. I think he has some speech and cognitive delays. You can teach him colors but if you ask him to go get the red ball he can't connect it. The parents have been more relaxed about it. The nice thing is that they are not in denial. They do recognize that he is behind, but are slow to take action. Since he was getting close to being 3 his mom started looking at preschools and had mentioned that she had narrowed it down to 2. That is when I brought up having him evaluted (the parents realize the speech delays, but are not so much realizing the cognative ones so much). They did get him in for an evalu. through AEA, but it took about 3 mos. before the therapy started. The parents are not seeing how far delayed he has become and how important it is to get that help ASAP so he does not keep falling further and further behind. (This has been frustrating for me. I want to help him, but don't have the knowledge of how and since I am not his parents I can't get him into the programs I know that will at the speed he needs.) They have just started the speech therapy, so I am hoping the therapist sees the other delays I am seeing and then directs the parents from there. I think the special needs preschool at our local school would be good for him, but I am not sure if the parents are thinking about doing that. Right now I am hoping the therapist mentions that since they go to the school for the therapy. One thing I was looking for to give to his parents before they were getting him help was something that said where a 2 yr old should be developmentally (sometimes hard to find just for age 2). I figured this would give them info. on where he should be and then allow them to realize where he is. I would let the parents know what you are seeing (if you have not already). I started doing this over time. With the ending of this little boys words. I had just mentioned one day that I noticed that he was having a hard time saying the ending of his words. I think this then allowed the parents to pay more attention to that and notice that he was not getting them at all. I would do this with different things he was doing over a period of time, so it did not seem like I was overwhelming them with a list of things or making them feel defensive. Sometimes I would be able to mention something because it was something different we worked on that day, so I could say this is what we were doing today and this is what I noticed. I would not do that each day though. Sometimes I was able to bring something up because of where our conversation had gone (ie: the preschool conversation). I am still frustrated that the are not seeing the importance/need like I do, but I am greatful that the are open to getting help and are recognizing some of the delays. Hope that helps a little bit. It is SO nice to just be able to relate to someone that is dealing with the same situation. If you ever need to vent just drop me a note. I have done that A LOT with my husband.