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What do you do to help a tennager that doeant seem to care?

Autumn - posted on 09/30/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

I have a 15 year old son that only does what he wants, if he is required to do anything beforehand he will wait until the very last second and then only does what the bare minimum for something to said it got done. He doesnt take pride in doing a good job and rarely finishes a project that he wants to do (he leaves the messes). He is very crafty though to do all the things he does do when we are not home to supervise his work. He says he cares about his grades but continues to bring home D and F's on report cards. It seems like we have to get really pissed off before he will do anything. He doesn't use the computer often, he doesn't watch a lot of T.V.

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Sharon - posted on 05/16/2012

155

Umm, I'm betting he likes to eat. What would he do if you did the bare minimum for providing meals. Put the plates on the table and havethe weiners in the fridge, freezer would be better.

Does he like his clothes clean, provide the soap and the machines.

As far as the D's and F's go, a talk with the teachers and holding him back a year might give him some motivation. I only had to threaten with mine and the grades came up.

Remember, no work no pay, that is how it works in the real world. Pay = food and housekeeping. Don't find the stuff for him again that he doesn't clean up. So much for that project he wanted to do.

I know it sounds tough but it does work.

Once you stop doing for them, they find they have to do for themselves.

Amy - posted on 04/26/2012

My son is very similar except he watches TV, plays video games and is on the computer ALL the time. My probelm is I'm the only one who cares that he doesn't care, I have no support from my husband with it and he's my step-son. So I have to tred lightly if I don't want him to hate me. The only thing I've found that somewhat works is finding something to motivate him and for our son it's driving and dirt bike riding. If he doesn't do what he's supposed to, the rule is he won't be driving or dirt bike riding. The problem in our house though is tha regardless of whether or not he's doing what he should be doing, his dad still takes him dirt bike riding and is signing him up for drivers ed. It's so frustrating because I don't know how my kids are going to learn responsibility at all in a house with no true discipline. I have to just sit and watch it happen.