Melischa - posted on 02/02/2011 ( no moms have responded yet )
I am divorced from a firefighter, a great man and a wonderful father, but we were just not meant to be. When we divorced, I wanted to keep it simple and easy...I agreed NOT to make him pay child support and that I would work around his rotating schedule. However, now...I feel like it is biting me in the ass. To understand my story, let me give you a glimpse of the whole picture. I was married before and had 2 children. I left this man because of a drug usage problem. I left him when I was pregnant. Right after having my daughter, I met up with a guy i dated in highschool (the firefighter) and we started dating. Not long after I got pregnant, and a year after my other daughter came, we got married. WE were married for almost 5 years. So, I currently have to deal with the first ex in regards to my 2 oldest kids (bc now since he went to rehab he feels he is super dad, even tho he was not there for 7 years of their lives) and with the firefighter in regards to my youngest. I respect both men for putting the effort in to be a dad...as they should be. Matt (the firefighter) is a wonderful person...but again, just not for me. Anyhow...I feel that he takes me for granted. He has a live in girlfriend who I just love, because she is great to Raegan and has ALWAYS shown me nothing but respect. However, because of his rotating schedule....he thinks he can control EVERYTHING. So I have my other children on Mon, Wed and eveyr other weekend. I do have Raegan (daughter of firefighter) every other weekend at least. So on Tues and Thursdays I either work late or try to fit in time with my current boyfriend. However, it seems Matt does everything in his power to make sure that I have raegan on tues and thurs. Now let me make myself clear, I dont care that I have her on the nights that are my free nights...that isnt what bothers me. But if I have her on Tues and Thursdays, then she doesnt get to spend time with her brother and sister...and I hate that! Im just at wits end. Because if he feels that i should keep her, but i have plans to work late or something, he makes a big deal out of it. Yet not only do i keep her when he works, but he throws in days that he decides to work for other people without giving me warning. I cant make plans or live my life at all. I feel like I am still under his control and I hate it. Does anyone here have any ideas? Or should I really just learn to live with it because he is a firefighter. Seems pretty unfair to me.