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Hello, anyone else here?

Mary - posted on 05/04/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hi, I do have a daughter by an open adoption, and this caught my eye. There are other similar ones I guess. I am in an adoption one also.

anyways, I have adopted the daughter of my niece, and my niece has since had another daughter with the same man and is now engaged to him. Life is always interesting isn't it? So far no problems, as Bree is only 4 going on 5, but I anticipate some confusion etc. later.

She calls my SIL Grandma and that SIL visits a lot. (we do live 1600 miles away, but still, 2-3 times a year.) And all my nieces are her aunts and uncles. Oh, and we since gave birth to another son, and she is Grandma to him also, she is so sweet about it, so there is no, "No, I"m only Bree's grandma". So far, its been working out pretty much lovely. But I worry in the back of my brain that someday there might be difficulties. But I"m willing to chance it, to have my beautiful angel.

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Mary - posted on 05/07/2009

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Thats lovely Heather. :) Some people just have such big hearts, and I am so grateful for those big hearts! :)

Heather - posted on 05/07/2009

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Hi, Mary! I'm glad you're here! My sister and her husband adopted the sons of his sister. I haven't had first-hand experience with open adoption from a family member, but I witnessed their situation. Although rewarding, I know it was challenging for them at times, but only because the boys were taken from his sister for neglect, so she was not as cooperative as they would have wished.



My situation is a bit different. We chose for our first adoption to be open, and my oldest daughter's birthmother is very involved in her life. However, my youngest daughter's birthmother is not as involved as she said she would be, and this is the problem we face. My youngest daughter is very hurt by the difference in the amount of attention she receives from her birthmother. Our girls have the same birthfather, so they are half sisters. The birthfather is not involved with either of them.



We have a similar WONDERFUL situation with my oldest's biological grandmother. She treats both girls just the same, and does the same for one as she does for the other, including a beautiful handmade quilt she made each of them last Christmas. We are so grateful for her, as my mother is no longer living, and my husband's parents live too far away. She is truly a blessing to all of us, so I totally understand your relief at how she responds to your son!

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