A Vacation without Kids... is it okay?

Jen - posted on 02/03/2010 ( 21 moms have responded )

14

7

0

I am 26 and am planning to go on vacation to a different country without my 2 children. My Kids are almost 6 and 8 1/2.... I am a single mom who spends every second with my children, we took a vacation last october to the dells, nothing but kid times... it was fantastic I felt I needed a vacation FROM that vacation. I have recently had an invite to go to Amstradam- AMSTRADAM!!! , of course that'd be a no kid vacation! I have reasonable, responsable, adults to care for my children while I am away, I would be gone for 5 to 10 days.
What's your opinion? is it okay? is it fair, do i deserve it or am I being selfish?
Im kind of torn, because i feel i do indeed deserve this, but at the same time i havent spent more than a few nights away from my kids at a time, and we've always been in the same town... should I just plan a vacation including my children within the states? It's been so long since i've cut lose, let alone had such a great offer.... Im lost, torn and feel guilty...

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Brittany - posted on 02/03/2010

13

58

0

yes i believe you do need a vacation! believe me vacations away from ur children will make you a better mom! i would go even thou i would feel bad but as long as there taking care of go and enjoy yourself!

Danielle - posted on 02/03/2010

50

25

7

Jen kuddos to you for being a single mom that is probably one of the hardest jobs that there is. You spend every minute with your kids and I think that this vacation is something that you deserve for yourself. It's not going to make you less of a mom if you'd take sometime out for yourself. So go and enjoy as long as you feel certain that you have responisble trustworthy people that would care for your children like you would want them to be cared for while not with you. Please enjoy your vacation and let us moms know how you enjoyed it.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

21 Comments

View replies by

Kathleen - posted on 06/26/2014

1

0

0

It is absolutely okay. I've done the same and I've gotten grief from my mother, other family members, people ask if my husband is really okay with that etc etc. It's BS. This isn't the 1960's. I work full time, go to school full time, manage my 2 kids and family and sometimes I need some relaxation to diffuse. My husband is 100% supportive of my trips and I'd be cool with it if he travelled with friends but yeah I do catch hell from people judging. I'm a paramedic with crazy hrs, I just finished architecture school....what if I were take a job that requires me to go on trips? What about military moms and dads? Does that mean they are selfish for having careers and serving their country? Point is....it's not going to affect the kid's growth. The family with survive, it will be ok, there's skype and video messaging and the kids don't suffer, but parents need a break to sometimes. It's a full time plus job that also requires 2 weeks of vacation and some sick days ;) Being a wife or parent doesn't mean you have to give up your individuality or feel stifled. You CAN balance and everyone will be better because of it. Go for it!

Lisa - posted on 04/08/2014

2

0

0

im a 31 yr old mum who has 3 children age 21mths.5 1/2,4 now I also do go awawy to Egypt for 10 days in july but I do feel guilty for leaving them behind.as ive never gone that long with out them.i do spend 24/7 with my children except when the 2 eldest are at school.now im been given the cold should from my ex boyfriend who is not very keen on the idea of me flying off and leaving them behind.he thinks that's its only fair that if can go away fornearly 2wks he can do the same

Angela - posted on 02/15/2010

8

13

1

ABSOLUTELY you should go. My boyfriend and I alternate years with my kids for vacation. One year we go on a "family" vacation. They next year we take an "Adult Only" vacation. Lots of single moms feel like they are abandoning their kids when the are really takihg necessary time for themselves. Trust someone who's been there you will be a better mother for your kids by taking some time for yourself once in a while. Angela

MARY - posted on 02/14/2010

14

16

0

it is not only a vacation for you but for them they will get to experience being little grown ups for awile. It taught my guys that mom does do alot to make a day go so smooth. they learned to resect me more. believe me it had been 14 years since I was on my last vacation I needed to get away from scout meetings sporting event and other activities to realize I am not just mom I am a great mom who is also a woman.

Jessica - posted on 02/13/2010

13

22

0

Everyone needs a break! When you have a break from work you actually get a break!
A full time mum who takes her kids on a holiday is still WORKING!!!
Leave them with someone you trust and have a great time, I've done it a few times now, I try to go away every few years.
I'm off again in June for a wedding and am planning for a big one in 2 years time.
I do it every few years, I am so grateful to have Grandma, Aunty, Nanna and a few fantastic friends in the same town as us!

Kevyn - posted on 02/10/2010

32

15

2

i'm so glad to see everyone here saying take it! I totally agree! :D Although I would have a tough time being away from my kids for that long, I still think it sounds like a blast! If you feel bad, you can ALWAYS call and talk them in to bed at night :P They are going to miss you but you also won't always be there and they will need to learn that at some point. This is a positive small step towards teaching them later indepedence, I believe. And do have fun on that trip!! We're all jealous :D

Michelle - posted on 02/10/2010

16

22

2

YES..YES...YES. I think that it is absolutely fine that you take some time for yourself...you had your family Vacation and your kiddies are old enough to understand that you need just a little time for you. and Girl...its Amstradam..you can call your kids,

Sharon - posted on 02/10/2010

6

1

0

we all need a break from our kids sometimes it actually makes them understand if u go to work or out for a meal with friends,speak to them over the fone or postcards lets them know u are comin bak u just going on a wee adult trip

Samantha - posted on 02/09/2010

13

4

0

Although my kids arent quite school aged (almost 4), I think it is very important for parents to have their space. If I takes a trip away for you to perk up, and feel good, and get out some of your frustrations, or even just to relax in a tub and read a book, you need your space. It will make you a better and happier mom. However first and foremost comes your child. As long as you have somewhere safe and reliable for your child to stay, I absolutely think you should go. Good Luck, and Have FUN!!!

Danielle - posted on 02/06/2010

7

4

0

You always need to make time for you, or you can't be the best you can for your kids. If you don't take time for yourself, you will get overwhelmed faster and stressed out. take the vacation!

Susie - posted on 02/06/2010

4

25

0

YES...YES....Do it. You need some time by yourself, so u can enjoy them when u come back. Can i come....LOL

Samar - posted on 02/06/2010

2

28

0

I thenk you have you to go this vacation.and you allready do your jop twar your kieds and you have to tell them you will go to be fresh also to contenuo yorur hard work with them.........have anice time

Michele - posted on 02/05/2010

81

107

10

I was a single mom for several years so I understand the internal conflict you are having with this decision. But having been there and just being a mom I believe a vacation would be a great way for you to re-energize and take care of yourself. As important as it is to be a mom, it's just as important to have some time to yourself. I believe your kids are old enough to leave for that length of time, especially if you have individuals that are responsible and that you trust with your children. It's not selfish, Go for it! I'm sure even your kids will enjoy the time away visiting with others that they care about. Have fun!!!

Angie - posted on 02/05/2010

2,621

0

406

I think it's necessary for you as a single mom to take some time for yourself. As long as you won't be taking money out of the regular family budget I think it's a great idea.

Antoinette - posted on 02/05/2010

16

12

1

You must take care of you to be able to take full care of them. They will be fine and they may even enjoy the vacation from youi. I dont mean this as a mean thing. I thought the same thing when me and my husband wanted to do a vacation on our own so we sent the kids off to grandmas and when we got back they had such a great time that we were all relaxed. now we make it a yearly thing. every other year we all go together and every other year we do it apart. It also teaches them that while we as parents are away, we do come back. I hope this helps.

Kellie - posted on 02/04/2010

146

17

20

i think your kids are old enough to be without you for a week. Of couse they are going to miss you and that should make you feel good not guilty. Maybe to ease your sense of "guilt" you and the caregivers can plan some fun things to do that will get the kids minds off of you being gone and make it a fun experience for them too. Yes it's ok, yes its fair, and you absolutely deserve it. Just a side note and not to scare you or anything but you should get a Temporary Healthcare power of attorney for the kids. Just in case they catch a cold or need to see the doctor for something minor it give the caregivers authority to make decisions on behalf of the children. it's only good for the time you are gone. === Have a great time!!!!

Alicia - posted on 02/04/2010

6

46

0

i'm a single mom as well and i know how you feel. but i try to take at least one vacation a year without them. they have me 365. one week or one day never hurt any body. you deserve it! go have fun.just remember to leave the guilt at home!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms