at what age should you tell your kids about santa?
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Ariana - posted on 01/03/2013
Never. Never have that conversation.
You know why you should never do this? Because they'll all figure it out on their own. And even when they're figuring it out sometimes kids like to allow themselves to believe santa is real even when they know he isn't.
I mean I was 10 and 'believed' in santa even though I knew it wasn't true. Telling them santa isn't real shatters everything, you're taking away their magical beliefs in christmas and everything. Letting them figure it out on their own gives them the opportunity to hold onto their childish ways a little longer until THEY'RE ready to give it up.
The best thing is that if they ever ask you 'is santa real?' or w/e just say Do you think he's real? and if they say yes then say well I guess he is then. If they say no then just say well if you don't think he's real try not to spoil it for your sister/brother other little kids etc, but don't even say 'you're right' or w/e just accept what he/she thinks. Don't shatter their little christmas spirits because you feel there's some right time they should know. We all figured it out on our own and so will they.
Cecilia - posted on 12/29/2012
My kids always knew. They also always knew their friend's believed in santa and they shouldn't tell them. Some people tell me i'm wrong for it and i stole away the magic of Christmas..,, Really??? I didn't know that the meaning of Christmas was some man breaking into your house and leaving you things..
The reason why i did it was because i didn't want to confuse them with my own white lies while i tell them there is no good lies.
Sera - posted on 08/13/2013
I have 3 boys 9, 7 1/2, and 61/2. My oldest has been asking if Santa is real because some kids at school said he is not. I don't want to ruin the fun of Santa for my younger boys just yet. They have been having a very rough year since their dad moved out. But my oldest is bright and he probably knows the truth but I think that he is not ready to let go of his belief in Santa. So he asks me if I believe in Santa. I tell him that I believe in the spirit of Santa and the happiness he brings. He is the only one of my three boys that would understand that. He says that Santa and Christmas are a time for giving to others and not expecting anything in return except joy.
I did some research though and found the perfect poem that is titled "The Spirit of Santa Claus". It addresses this very issue that we all have to face eventually. But the way it is done it preserves the spirit of Santa while taking the stress off of mom and dad. I pasted the poem below but the link makes the poem's message really shine through and bring tears to my eyes. (http://www.wrensworld.com/spiritofsanta....).
The Spirit of Christmas
"Daddy", the child said, her eyes full of tears,
"Will you talk to me and quiet my fears?
Those bad boys at school are spreading a lie
And saying that reindeer can't possibly fly!"
"There's no Santa Claus, they say with a grin,
There's not one now and there never has been!
How can one man take all of those toys
To thousands and thousands of good girls and boys?"
"But I told them, Daddy, that they were not right,
And that I would come home and find out tonight.
Mama said wait until you come home,
So please tell me now that I was not wrong."
Her Daddy looked at her questioning face
And puffed his pipe while his frantic mind raced.
He had put this off as long as he could,
He had to think fast and it better be good!
Whispering a prayer, he began with a smile,
"Well climb on my lap, dear, let's talk a while.
"Remember at church how we learned to pray,
Asking God to take care of us every day?"
"And you know how we say Grace before each meal,
To this same God whom we know to be real?
Though we never see Him, we know He is there
Watching His children with such loving care."
"God started Christmas a long time ago
When He gave us His Son to love and to know.
A spirit of giving came with that birth,
And God's generosity filled the whole earth."
"Man had to name this spirit of giving
Just as he names all things that are living.
The name Santa Claus came to someone's mind,
As good a name as any to find."
"There is, you can see, and I think it's quite clear,
Truly a Santa who visits each year.
A spirit, like God, whom we never see,
He enters the hearts of your mother and me."
"Each year at Christmas for one special night,
We become him and make everything right.
But the real spirit of Christmas is in you and in me,
And I hope you are old enough now to see
That as we believe and continue to give,
Our friend Santa Claus will continue to live!"
Shannon - posted on 01/07/2013
I never really planned on when to tell my kids. I was always too scared they'd be upset. But guess what? As they get older they figured it out and weren't upset. Don't feel pressured to tell them if you think it'll hurt them. My mother never told me and now youngest is 11 and she knows. She just assumed it was something like how a halloween costume is for halloween and that it was fun christmas costume. And basically...it is. Kids are smarter than we give them credit for. Don't worry.
Walter - posted 4 days ago
Santa is real !!!!!! I am 39 !!!!!!! :-)
I could not agree more with
Ariana - posted on 01/03/2013
"Never. Never have that conversation"
Yes, I hear all the arguments about the truth, trust, reality and what not.... and I agree with many of them. But I truly believe that a child should have some magic, some imagination, that is what inspires many people to become great people when they grow up.
Don't tell them. they will figure it out on their own.
To be honest, I find it hard to believe that any kid in school doesn't already know it. Once you enter kinder, perhaps first grade (so ages 5-7) you already know. But kids hold on to these things because its part of being a child.
We should not rush kids to mature faster than they should. let them be kids.
Toni - posted on 12/03/2013
My son is 5 and I have always been honest.
This year I had to explain that some people believe that Santa is real and that he is the one that brings the presents, but our family doesnt.
I have always been the same with things like the Easter Bunny and the tooth fairy too.
Anne - posted on 11/24/2013
I was rolling laughing at all the comments on here. Okay, yes, kids do figures out that Santa is not real. When us kids were young, our Mom told us the truth about Christmas and Santa, but did that ruin our lives? No! The truth is about Jesus the reason of the season...and no, we didn't ruined it for the other kids, we'd played along just for fun. Now having a kid of my own, thinking about what age is the right to explain the truth? I never sat down and talk a lot about Santa, so I just explains the truth to my then, 7 years old son, the reason why we celebrate Christmas not so much about Santa, as I explained the story about the birth of Jesus and the reason of the season, etc. seriously, there is no harm when explaining to your children that there is no Santa which was a old story told many years ago. Now, did that ruin his spirit of Christmas (or mine when I was young)? NO! it all for fun & you can still have that spririt of Christmas no matter what. It's teaching our kids that its okay to tell a little white lies really... Some of you may or may not be a believer in Jesus, perhaps it is time to tell your children the truth, the real truth.
Jamie - posted on 09/07/2013
Wow, the poem posted below is wonderful! Thank you so much for sharing. I was doing some research because my son presented his case for why Santa isn't real. I read him the poem and we both cried. He is upset but he understands. I was beginning to feel with all of his questions, if I didn't allow him to go ahead and discover the truth, he was just going to think I was lying to him. Thanks again so much for sharing.
Ryan - posted on 03/06/2013
My oldest daughter is 5 1/2 and she figured it out on her own. She knew that Faries aren't real, and she figured out the Tooth Fairy, and the EB shortly after. Then a few days ago she told me that she thought we were Santa, I tried to play it off, like the others TF and EB, but she was pretty persistant, and wouldn't let it go. She had figured it out, and told us that she knew. I tried often to ask if someone told her, but she consistantly said no one told her (she doesn't know any older kids). My wife and I have done a masterful job of keeping up the stories of Christmas, and haven't had any slip-ups. While I'm dissapointed, I have to say that I am a little proud of her that she logically reasoned through it, and came up with it on her own, and so very early. She is very smart, but emotionally less mature than other kids her age. Now I am trying to manage her not telling her 4 yr old little sister, and everyone in her class.
Amanda - posted on 12/24/2012
I found out when I was 4 , no one told me, I just saw that Santa gave me the same gifts that were hidden in my parents closet and the extra room, but I have a friend that couldn't figure it out until they were 15, tell the, by 10-12, or they'll fake until that age which I did.
Ron - posted on 12/23/2012
I do not feel there is nothing wrong with a child believing in Santa Claus as Santa represents the generosity and kindness that we feel each Christmas. I would begin by reading your children a poem called "Teach The Children." Since my return from the Navy, I read this each and every year to remind my brothers, sisters, nephews, nieces and cousins the true meaning of Christmas. Here is a link; Merry Christmas and God Bless You!!! http://resources.woodlands-junior.kent.s...
Alannah - posted on 12/22/2012
When there mature enogh. Every child is diffrent. Let them come to you and ask. If they ask don't lie, unless there real younge. Don't take all the joy away from them. My daughter is 4 and some of her friends say theres no santa, she says "yes there is". My son is 10 and was heartbroken when I told him. He yelled at me and was crying. I cried too. Dont take away there happiness.
Janelle - posted on 12/22/2012
When they ask to know the truth tell them. Then deny the truth in a playful way come next fall. I sort of like to use Santa to stop all the "Can you get me?" and "I want for Christmas". I like to say "I don't know, you'll have to ask Santa." Its fun to watch the look on their faces as they try to decide if I'm really kidding or not. I like to keep it light and silly. But if my child asks me in a serious way for the truth, I'm going to give it to him.
Lucy - posted on 12/16/2012
Hi Brianna Lindley. I have a daughter who is 12 years old, and we told her last year. She was upset at first, because she always loved Christmas Eve, and felt excited to wake up on Christmas morning. Telling your children at age 6 and 8 is too young. My daughter got over this, and handled it in a mature way. I also have a son, who is 3 years younger than my daughter, and she told him that she still believes, to ensure that he will still enjoy the "christmas magic" of santa like she did when she was his age. What i'm trying to say, is tell them at an age when THEY are ready. Right now is too early. This will be my daughter's first christmas knowing "the truth" , and I've noticed that she doesn't seem as excited about Christmas eve anymore, and can't seem to find that 'holiday magic" she used to believe in.
I hoped that this was helpful.
Marta - posted on 12/05/2012
In the Polish tradition Santa brings gifts on December 6th, on St. Nicholas' feast day, while "the Evening Star" brings gifts on Christmas Eve. To this day my mother addresses all of the gifts to us (myself, my husband, and my siblings and their spouses) and all of the grandchildren from "The Evening Star". As we open our gifts we say "Thank you, Gwiazdka!"--Gwiazdka translating to Star. As adults we know that this isn't true, that the giver is my mom, but it just makes the evening that much more special. Remember, Christmas isn't about the receiving of gifts, but about the joy of spending time as a family, and (for Christians) about celebrating the Birth and life of Christ. My eldest is 7 and I've been wondering about this too, but the more I think about it I realize that no one had to tell me that Santa Claus isn't real, or that the Evening Star is a myth it's just something I came to realize, and I think I will let the same happen for my kids. I will never ruin the joy of Christmas for them, and even as they grow up I will continue to address our Christmas presents to them from Santa; and when my mother becomes too old and frail or passes away I will take up her mantel and host a traditional Polish Christmas Eve dinner with gifts given from the Evening Star. After all Christmas is based on traditions and customs.
Shelly - posted on 12/02/2012
Trust me with this one:- You will have to tell you'r kids around the age of 11, because no children believe when they get to comp, they grow old enough to understand, but still my 12 year old daughter (who found out last year) still play's along with the younger cousins, who still belive;
Anita - posted on 12/02/2012
They should believe for as long as possible. My daughter who is 10 now we had to tell the truth to her at 8 years old and she was really disappointed but a bully was teasing her constantly about her believing in Santa. We sat her down and let her know that the legend of Santa is true as many many years ago a nice old man use to give out toys to the less fortunate and the spirit of giving is still alive in all of us so we as parents continue the spirit of Santa when we give them gifts at Christmas. My family is catholic so we also have the reason we celebrate Christmas is because we are celebrating Jesus' birth and the three wise-men came to bear gift to Jesus at the stable where he was born. The tradition of gift giving continues today as we celebrate Christ's Mass ( Christmas). We told her we want her to keep the spirit of Santa alive so if there are smaller kids around she should tell them she still believes so they continue to believe for as long as possible.
Vera - posted on 11/23/2012
My kid is also 8, and I was wondering the same thing. Some of his friends and classmates no longer believe in Santa and I don´t want him to be left behind. I guess the best thing you can do is to go along with it until you feel your child is ready to know the truth. Innocence in children is so rare this days and Santa is one of the things that keeps it alive. You can always tell them that Santa will exist as long as they want him to, but my guess is that at least for you eight year old, he´ll stop believing soon, two years tops.
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