at what age should you tell your kids about santa?

Joanne - posted on 11/23/2011

Now, they should have already known (you are santa).

Brandi - posted on 11/23/2011

My son has never believed in Santa, because I have told him the truth from the beginning. It is just me and him. I have read him the story of St. Nicholas and other holiday traditions. Each year, due to my financial situation, he gets one present from me. We still stuff each others stockings and have fun doing so.
He is just as excited on Christmas eve as any other child. He can't sleep because of the excitement .... we finally get to open presents and see if everyone likes their gifts.
He enjoys being Santa to others, by giving. I think the commercialism of Christmas has taken over in so many ways. I am happy I have always told him the truth.

Liz Gonzalez - posted on 11/19/2011

This is the age that their peers are talking a lot about santa, and you should be very honest with them, because those kids may have older siblings and may already know that santa isn't "real". This may be confusing them and at a point where they may say they do believe and be made fun of...sad, but it does happen. Tell them you do the work for Santa. Then tell them the story of St. Nick and how you carry on the tradition. It works! I have a 19, 13 and 10 year old!

Amelia - posted on 11/14/2011

Santa is the magic of Christmas....and that can last forever!!! My 10 year old asked me last year if Santa was real and I told him, "it's about what you believe".....Santa doesn't come around to non-believers ;)

Juliann - posted on 11/14/2011

I have a 9YO daughter with ADHD and social issues - her counselor told me I should tell her so that the kids at school do not make fun of her for still believing. I had a hard time with it but I really do not want the girls (who can be very mean) teasing her more than they already do.

Caroline - posted on 10/11/2010

my 9 year old asked me was it true today. she was pondering the hows and stuff. i figured since she asked that she was ready, (she's fairly mature for her age). Now she's heartbroken! I ended up crying myself wondering how i could be so stupid to give it up so easily. Then it hit her that the easter bunny and the tooth fairy are all in the same gang, and she was heartbroken anew. i feel like i've robbed her. i feel likew i've taken from her so much more than santa. she's doubtful of all the magic of the world now and had to ask me, "what about angels and jesus...?". All in all a very emotional evening at my house. she said she wishes that she could go back to not knowing. i feel like i killed a little bit of her innocence today. (sorry for sounding so dramatic).
i sooo didn't see this comin,

Melanie - posted on 12/19/2009

I have done that here and they don't have anything like that here. We are not in a large city or anything like that so, the resources are very limited. I mean, for me, I understand the meaning of Christmas and I try to instill that into my children as well and teach them that it isn't about what you get but what you can give. Unfortunately, with Christmas being so commercialized, it's impossible to completely get them to understand. I love the idea of Christmas, and what St. Nick stood for when he was first created. I don't like the way it has turned out. I think that the economy has killed the true meaning of Christmas and Santa Claus and it really hits those of us who fall into the "poor" category the hardest.

Amy - posted on 12/19/2009

My daughter found out on her own when she was 10 and I think she would rather still believe.

Michelle - posted on 12/18/2009

Quoting Melanie:

My issue is this: I am single, disabled, living on a fixed income of a mere $694 a month. My children are not going to have a Christmas this year and they are both 6. I need to know how to go about telling them because they are ultimately going to be disappointed either way. "Santa" is not coming this year and there is no way around that. So, how do I tell them? I think it is better for them to know now, and understand why there is no Christmas than for them to be disappointed and heartbroken when Santa just doesn't show up.

I know it is to late for this year but next year contact your local Social Services Department and see if they do the Secret Santa program in your area.

Melanie - posted on 12/18/2009

My issue is this: I am single, disabled, living on a fixed income of a mere $694 a month. My children are not going to have a Christmas this year and they are both 6. I need to know how to go about telling them because they are ultimately going to be disappointed either way. "Santa" is not coming this year and there is no way around that. So, how do I tell them? I think it is better for them to know now, and understand why there is no Christmas than for them to be disappointed and heartbroken when Santa just doesn't show up.

Debbie - posted on 12/14/2009

I have an 11 year old stepson, and an 8 and 2 year old daughter. I really never did the Santa thing when I was young. My parents never tried to tell me that there was a Santa Claus. When I got remarried, my daughter was 5 years old and to be honest, I was mixed on what I should do. I wanted her to have the fantasy and all but I also wanted to be honest with her.



When she asked me about Santa, I told her that I have never seen him but that I believe in him. She knows that we buy gifts for her but she thinks Santa drops off a gift or two as well. I know this sounds harsh and probably a bit selfish on my part but I guess I want some of the acknowledgment from what I get her for Christmas. I put a lot of work into getting just the right thing and making sure she has a nice Christmas. But I still want her to have the Christmas spirit and all that.



I told her that generally I realized at Christmas time that there would always be one or two gifts that I got that I didn't know who gave it to me and how I like to think it was Santa.

Angela - posted on 12/14/2009

I think kids figure out that Santa is not a man in a red suit on their own, and that he represents the spirit of giving. I have told my 12 year old this, "Santa may not be one man wearing a red suit, but there is a Santa, he is the Salvation Army, the Toys for Tots people, the Bikes and Trikes people, and everyone that helps those less fortunate at Christmas. Like when they ask for spare change and you give whats in your pocket, that makes you someones Santa."

Nicola - posted on 12/14/2009

Why would you burst there delicious happy christmas buuble by telling them there is no santa if its not for religous reasons let them be kids as long as they can and enjoy the lovely smiles and excitment they exude thinking about all things christmassy.

Lora - posted on 12/13/2009

I have an 11 year old son and he still believes in Santa. There are kids at his school that say there is no Santa Clause. He asked me about it and I told him that Santa is not like you and me. Santa is magical just like the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. I told him to believe in what he feels and not to let anyone tell him otherwise. There isn't much left in this world for kids to believe in that is good and happy. Why not let them continue to believe in things that are inspiring. It doesn't hurt. Besides as they get older, they know deep inside what the truth is anyway.

Ruth - posted on 12/09/2009

Amen to that Stephanie!

Stephanie - posted on 12/09/2009

Children, especially in today's world, don't get to hold on to their innocence as long as they should... with that being said, I'd let the nature of their imagination run its course. They'll naturally figure it out. Until then, enjoy the moment because before you know it, they'll be asking you the same question about their little ones!!!

Stephanie - posted on 12/09/2009

Children, especially in today's world, don't get to hold on to their innocence as long as they should... with that being said, I'd let the nature of their imagination run its course. They'll naturally figure it out. Until then, enjoy the moment because before you know it, they'll be asking you the same question about their little ones!!!

Ruth - posted on 12/09/2009

We let our kids find out for themselves and then they get to be "in on the secret" for the younger kids.

Crystal - posted on 12/08/2009

i agree...dont tell them, they will tell you when they dont anymore, or when theyre ready to admit they dont....i was in grade 4 and my teacher told us....that was horrible for him to do

Amy - posted on 12/08/2009

Why tell them?! Let them believe as long as they can! There is so little "magic" left in the world...let your children enjoy believing!

Marybeth - posted on 12/08/2009

i agree with the letting them believe as long as they can!!! the magic that it brings in everyones eyes on christmas day is priceless...but dont also forget to tell them that the most important thing about christmas is that JESUS WAS BORN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Julia Kat - posted on 12/08/2009

I found out there was no Santa during a game of hide-and seek. My mother had a sectional couch that she'd move parts of it into the guest bedroom in order to set up the Christmas tree in our living room. I went to hide from my younger sister inside the overlapping sectional pieces when I found all of the pre-wrapped presents from "Santa". I got out of the bedroom and told my sister we should play another game. I don't know if all kids would be the same, but I think being an older child and finding out myself, I kept it from my sister and even from my mom. I didn't want my mom to know I knew because I felt it might spoil all of her hard-work.



My son who is now 9 years old is being told by kids at school there is no Santa. He asked me one day and rather than saying they were right, I asked him "What do you believe?" and his response was "Well, I think that he exists because his handwriting on my presents are different from yours or dads." I will let him figure it out for himself. But I'll also be there for support and comfort when he fully realizes the truth.

Carol - posted on 12/08/2009

Mine is 10. I never told him.. Last year, he sort of figured it out and tried to confirm with us. We STILL not giving him the direct answer.. I wouldn't tell.. I still not confirmed with him.. I think it's better for children find out by themselves...

Claire - posted on 12/08/2009

My oldest daughter is 7. She still believes. It will break my heart when she finds out haha. I am worried she will tell her younger siblings.



My main concern is that she will find out at school about it when some other kid tells her.I dont want her to find out that way. But,,,,I dont want her to not believe just yet! Its a tough subject!

Christie - posted on 12/08/2009

My daughter is 10 years old and had still belive in santa till this year when kids where talking about it, she asked me if santa was real, and I told her santa was a spirt now, because years ago he was alive, but he is magic and never stop belivein in his spirt, and that is where the spirt of christmas comes from and she was okey with this and i talked to her about not spilling it for other kids who belive in santa, and she has been real good about this, I still try to say santas watching u, and she laughs.

Sharlene - posted on 12/07/2009

Never! There is a Santa - it is you. You carry on the spirit and magic of Christmas. Kids have enough non-believers surrounding them at school and elsewhere. No need to take the magic away earlier than need be.

Kristy - posted on 12/07/2009

I have 3 kids ages 11, 6, and 18 months. My 11 year old still believes to a point. She has heard us talking about gifts and we have asked her what she wants us to get her for Christmas. I think deep down she knows but doesn't want to give up the magic of Santa. I feel like we all, no matter how old we are still carry some "Santa magic" in our hearts. If my kids ask me, I will tell them about the man that Santa was based on and I will also let them know that we can always keep Santa magic in us and in turn be "Santa" to others.

Karen - posted on 12/07/2009

I wouldn't tell them. At some point they'll figure it out and then decide for themselves how they want to handle it. Heck, I still believe because Santa brings the toys... Friends of mine have answered either "what do you think?" or "do you want to talk about this now or later?" (if before Christmas it's usually later which never comes) or "I'm not sure I'd want to be the one to question that!" All of which answers the question while letting the child decide when they are ready to hear it. I don't remember being told, we just understood at some point what the deal was - and the fact that Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy all had the same handwriting! Santa is the spirit of the joy of giving at Christmas, so as long as you keep that alive there is still Santa.

Cori - posted on 12/07/2009

When they are mature enough to not tell other kids. Also, I plan on telling my son when he asks, but I will take him to toys for tots and let him see the soilders hand out the toys. I don't want to loose trust and feel it is good for him to understand their is a Santa, he just comes in the form of many loving, kind, and careing people with one great goal!

Dawn - posted on 12/07/2009

My kids are the same ages and I've been turning this over in my head lately as well. I've decided to let the kids believe as long as they wish. In the meantime, I'm learning as much as I can about Saint Nicholas who lived somewhere between 300-400 A.D. There is a historical background to Santa Claus and that is what I want my children to know and remember for as long as they live. Taking that info. into account, I consider myself to be a believer. I believe in the message and in the character though I know that there are no flying reindeer and sleighs. My brother and SIL have always taught their kids the historical story as opposed to the flying reindeer and sleighs. We will all be together this Christmas Eve so we're working through how to handle that. This may be the year that the bubble gets burst.

Luvee - posted on 12/07/2009

The way I see it there was a man who a very long time ago used to make toys from wood or other things and leave them at doorsteps or in the kids shoes that were left outside when someone seen him doing so he asked not to be given anything he just wanted to make the kids happy , they called him Nickelous ... so my family just says that the stocking gifts or 1 gift is from"Santa" the rest is from family...

I did see the option of not telling them and letting them figure it out and ask you , which is good also. hope you get help from your answers. :)

Niki - posted on 12/07/2009

just let them find out by themselves, I know it's hard to get different paper for the santa gifts, and change the writting on the tags, oh yeah different tags too, but when they sparkle with the belief in the magic of Christmas on Christmas morning all the extra effort and trouble, the hiding presents and acting liek you have no clue becomes all worth while! Let them find out on their own, they will see how much you love them with all the extra effort and work that you put into it. :)

Jolene - posted on 12/07/2009

I think you should wait until they come to you, thats what happened when I was around 8 years old(cause I heard about it at school). My parents explained it to me in a way that made me feel important and grown up so I was excited to be in on the secret and help pretend so that my younger brother would believe as long as possible

Kimberly - posted on 12/07/2009

I have a 6 yr old and he still thinks that there is a santa.. Im not going to tell him the difference. Let them find out on there own. Dont you worry they will ask you sooner or later. And they will take it well all kids do

Allissa - posted on 12/07/2009

i let them find out on there own my daughter is four years am living in jamaica where nobody seem to ever talk about santa and she is askink me to give him a call and tell him what it is hse wants for christmas so dont spoil it for them let them find out on thetre own and be threr to comfort them if they need it.

Tina - posted on 12/07/2009

My 7 year old is hearing it from all the kids at school that there is no santa and he came home and asked me, and I just asked him what he thinks. I was also told that if they don't believe then they should not get any presents, that is just not nice LOL!

KELLY - posted on 12/07/2009

Personally, I figured it out when I was 5 yrs old. I have four children my 10 yr old has autism and hasn't figured it out yet. My 8 yr old figured it out 2 years ago. We have talked to her and have told her not to let her brothers know. Eventually they will all figure it out for themselves.

Michelle - posted on 12/07/2009

i just had this talk with my boyfriend since he feels like my son is old enough (6 years old) to know that santa doesnt exist. i personally feel that they will know when they are good and ready its not up to us to decide when to take away those things which brings kids excitement. my son actually just told me that he is confuse as to wheter he exist or not because of course his friends are telling him that he doesnt so i had to explain to him that its okay to be confuse and not have the answers to everything, in time his questions will be answer and he will be able to make his decision on what he chooses to believe

Dorelle - posted on 12/07/2009

Every year I always wonder how I'm going to be able to afford Christmas and by some strange mystery, I always end up being able to get all the gifts I want for the family. So, even though I am no longer a kid, even though I know Santa doesn't exist, I do believe that Christmas magic does exist!!! My 6yrs old is also questioning me a lot this year about Santa because she heard other kids at school say that Santa doesn't exist. I don't intend on telling her that those kids are right. She will make that decision herself when she feels ready. Meanwhile, if needed, I will explain to her that their is some sort of mysterious magic that happens at Christmas (whether you call it Santa or something else...) and that having faith in Christmas is important.

Melissa - posted on 12/07/2009

I agree with kimberly collins....let them find out on their own...if they have questions then answer them....i have kids that range frome 12 down to 4 and my two oldest are the only non believers...we had a talk and they won't ruin it for others...they actually like to help keep excitement going

Crystal - posted on 12/07/2009

My 6-yr. old daughter still believes, however she asks a lot of questions about Santa. I've let her know that when you don't believe in Santa, like her Dad, then he doesn't leave you presents anymore. She'll find out on her own. Last year I told her that Santa's asked me to wrap her presents, so I purchase two different wraps & it doesn't matter if she recognizes the handwriting. :-)

Myra - posted on 12/07/2009

Personally I think it is kinder not to shatter the fantasy of Santa but rather explain that Santa needs help in getting the gifts as well as let them know when you cannot help Santa. Eventually they work it out for themselves that you are Santa throughout the year

Jeanette - posted on 12/06/2009

I thought this to be an interesting read. A little off topic, sort of.

http://www.stnicholascenter.org/Brix?pag...

♥♥♥Happy Holidays everyone!♥♥♥

Stacy - posted on 12/06/2009

I have just been waiting for my kids to tell me they don't believe. My 11 yr. old just told me a week ago. He says he won't say nothing to the others. Let them tell you when it is time. They are still babbies.

Cynthia - posted on 12/06/2009

My kids are 9 and 3 so they both believe My 9 year old is asking but i told her that as long as you believe he will always be real and if the kids at school don't then maybe Santa wont bring them Gifts this year. lol I also told her its not possible Mommy And Daddy can afford all the gifts she gets so there has to be a Santa.

Aimee - posted on 12/06/2009

Over the course of a few months, my 8-year old son kept asking me questions about Santa and whether he was real or not. He even went as far as saying "YOU are Santa, aren't you mom?" I finally told him the truth for a few reasons: I didn't want to continue "lying" to him when he's asked me straight out, and I didn't want him to find out from other kids at school, which I was sure would eventually happen. However, when I told him, he seemed shocked, but he also said, "I knew it"! He's 9 now, and he knows that this secret is a major responsibility; if he respects that other children (including our 6 yr old daughter) still believe, he will continue to get presents from Santa. He's known for about 8 months and as far as I can tell, he hasn't told a soul. Good luck!

Angela - posted on 12/06/2009

I have never told my kids that. I have 4 ages 11, 10, 6, and 3. My 11 year old has ADHD and Ausphbergers. He sill believes... I think... unless he is just playing along with me! LOL My 10 year old thinks she knows everything. I think she is playing along! I love the majic of Christmas and I want to keep it as long as I can! Leaving out the cookies and all the sneaking around... I love it! But every parent is different so do what you think is best@ Good luck!

Sharon - posted on 12/06/2009

Well i suppose that's how kids know the truth about santa and the tooth fairy...their peers or older siblings. But as long as they believe in them i see no reason to spoil the fun.

Amanda - posted on 12/06/2009

I wasn't planning on telling my girls, but when my two older children, then ages 9 & 11, came to me and asked me directly and said "mom, you wouldn't lie to us, would you?", I had to be honest and tell them. I was really worried that if I wasn't honest with them about Santa, then they wouldn't believe me about Jesus and the real reason we celebrate Christmas. My youngest daughter, now age 8, still believes in Santa. The older children were told not to spoil it for her yet or their "Santa" gifts would not longer happen.

Becky - posted on 12/06/2009

My son is 7 and he came home the other day and told me that a boy at school told him that I was the tooth fairy. He still believes in Santa though and I don't intend to tell him any differently. I was pretty upset with the kid at school though, the kid is in the 5th grade. I think I'll let him believe as long as he does. I'm not to anxious for him to grow up since he's my only one!