Do you think it ok for a man/boy to defend them self??

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 06/30/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )




My son is 7 years old. Here is my question for you, I would like your opinions, especially for those of you who are mothers of boys. I don’t believe in a man beating on a woman, but I do believe in a man defending himself. Let me explain…When I was younger I have memories of my mother just beating on my father and he would just take it, trying to get her to calm down, and yet she wouldn’t. I mean it got bad, at times she would throw stuff at him!
This is my belief today…a man Is much stronger then a woman by all means so I don’t think he should beat her, but I feel that if he gives her a warning to quit putting her hands on him and he tries to walk away, then he has the right to defend himself…I also say this because I teach my son not to hit girls, I teach him to give them a warning to leave him alone and try his best to walk away….and if he cant defend himself…Like any mother I don’t want anyone picking on my child boy or girl….Like I said before a man/boy is stronger by far then a woman/girl and therefore a man would only have to give one good hit. If I had a girl I would let her know that if a man gives you a warning to leave him alone then do so……no one has the ok to lay hands on you….ever. what is your take on that???!!!

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Melanie - posted on 07/01/2010




Try getting him into karate so that he can learn how to block the blows without actually fighting. As long as he doesn't throw a punch, kick, slap, elbow or knee at the other person, except toblock the blows that they are throwing then you can fight a suspension on those grounds. Yes it is appropriate to defend himself, especially if he did not verbally instigate the fight. And I agree. We have told my son that as long as he doesn't start the fight that we will support him no matter what as far as the school goes though he will still have to take the punishment for fighting. We have gone so far as to get him a treat after a spectacular lose that got him suspended.

Suzanne - posted on 07/01/2010




I have 2 boys, ages 6 and 8... and a 4 year old daughter. The simplest thing I can teach them is to RESPECT themselves... and treat others, girls and boys, as they wish their brother and sister to be treated.... if they are feeling threatened, or bullied, then they need to find a grown up they trust (a teacher, noon-aide or parent) and find a resolution...

I was a victim of bullying as a child... so I'm doing what I can to teach them (and their friends) how NOT to be a victim.... and at the same time, not to be the bully...

Angie - posted on 06/30/2010




I think it's okay for a man or boy to restrain a woman or girl who is hitting him but not to hit her back unless he is in danger of being hurt. On the other hand, I also don't think a woman/girl should ever touch a man either. When my son was 4 a little girl in his preschool class use to like to practice karate on him when the teacher's back was turned. One day when she kicked him he threw himself to the floor and slid about 3 feet. That caught the teacher's attention and the karate stopped. He was smart enough to find a solution without hurting her.

Sherri - posted on 06/30/2010




Unfortunately you can no longer teach your son this as the new way of thinking in the schools. If a child puts a hand on another child they are automatically suspended now. My son was playing basketball on the playground and jumped up to shoot the ball and when he came back down he accidentally scratched a boy on the back of his neck he had two scratches. The school called me and informed me of the situation so I was aware of it. They even stated they had never once had my son ever in there office for any reason so they were pretty confident it was done accidentally but because they needed to inform the other mom they let me know as well. This happened on a Thursday on Saturday morning I had a knock on my door to find the police. She had pressed charges on my son for scratching her child. I could not believe this is how things are handled in this day in age. The police officer apologized profusely because honestly he didn't understand why he was there but because she filed a report they were obligated to follow up. On Monday morning I walked my children in to school demanded I speak to the principal explained the story to her and demanded that they no longer have any contact what so ever, I didn't even want them in the hall to go to lockers without being watched because I didn't want words even spoken to each other. It didn't end there with this other family but it is much to long of a story to continue. These kids are 11 yrs old!! So needless to say sadly no you can no longer teach your child to stick up for themselves, because of society now a days we are forced to make them tattle tales because it is the only resource these poor kids have without being suspended or having the police called on them. Never mind for something done on purpose even something done accidentally. :(

Belle - posted on 06/30/2010




i have been a victim of domestic violence in the past, but it is getting quite common for men to be the victim of domestic violence, as a woman, i was told to try to defend myself even though there was the obvious strength issue, but i think if a man suffers domestic violence then he has a right to defend himself or prosecute the woman, whatever your gender you shouldnt have to go through it.

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