frustrated with doctors and teachers..help!

Michelle - posted on 05/21/2012

Sounds like you need to see different specialist's like a Children's Hospital or someplace that can do a broad range of testing to find out what specifically is going on. Maybe he has Asperger's, a Sensory Disorder, or whatever. Just keep fighting for your child's rights and your rights. Be the squeaky wheel. Good luck.

Beth - posted on 05/20/2012

Certainly worth getting his hearing sorted - what are the options open to him. Depending on his level of hearing, then he may need gromits, hearing aids etc.. Look at getting speech therapy for him, to improve his speech. Also look at as a family (and get the school on board), for him learning sign language as well, hopefully this will mean that his communication skills will improve.

Work with the school to improve his behaviour - use them as a key tool to aide in his development. They will be aware of techniques that they can implement in a group environment that you can't do in a home situation.

Help develop coping strategies with him at home, if he feels that he is getting stressed/frustrated - get him to recognise the warning signs and also how he's going to deal with it.

Look at getting him assessed for being on the autism range and/or ADHD if for no other reason but to rule them out.

Certainly sit down with his teachers and the headteacher and work together about getting any medical assessments for him so that you can pick up any issues that need dealing with. If he does, then use/see it as a positive step as it means that it can be used as a stepping stone and maybe help to get some extra support for your son. My middle daughter has Dyslexia, and it means that she's had to have some extra help at school, also she attended speech therapy for 5 years. I saw both as a means to an end. When she got diagnosed with Dyslexia, it meant that we (as a family) could move on and I felt a big weight lifted off my shoulders.

Make sure that you have good boundaries in place for your son at home and also at school, reinforce them so that he has a good structure around him. Give him guidance about appropriate behaviour including stranger danger. See if the school will work with him and set up some sort of buddy system for him, the buddy (or buddies) can help your son tune in to what is going on, so that if he misses a social clue, he can get nudged/prompted by a friend.

As for losing games - worth playing games at home like snakes and ladders. Work on his tolerance for winning/losing. One thing I've said to all three of my girls is that you have to lose lots before you win lots. It's part of the fun of playing games.

Kristin - posted on 05/18/2012

I do not know what to tell you, My son was diadnosed with speech problems at ager 3 so the government stepped in and paid for him to have a speech therapist and to go to Pre school Development Progam. When he was 4 he was diadnosed with ADHD, as well as he has asthma, and like your son he has a hard time with social cues and when he is frustrated he will act out, We have found out that he is feeling frustrated because he is unable to communicate properly what he is trying to say. So his teachers and I decided to put him into occupational therapy and behavioral therapy and they were able to give good tips on what to do at home with him so he can learn patience and how to slow down and not resort to violence and anger to get his way due to his frustration levels. Also, what works with my son is giving him some time by himself and taking him out of situatuions that he may find disruptive ie. my son hates lining up with the kids and will cause a disturbance so the teachers either take him out first or he waits until all the others go first and follows behind. Also listen to your child and be patient on your end. Learning games also help as well as consistent discipline. With my son if you give him an inch he will take a mile, so consistency and structure are key. It will seem hard at first but you cant give up or get discouraged. You are not a bad parent and each child is different. I would also look into hiring a speech therapist. I am from Canada so speech therapy is covered by the government for children and adults of any ages based on their assessments, and most hospitals offer speech therapy. So maybe look into a private speech therapist (like i said not sure how it works in the States) and see if that helps as well as behavior clases. We have a program called CHADS which is awesome. There are programs out there to help you just need to find them. I hope this helps somewhat