Have you been told your child has trouble focusing, or may have ADD?

Cheryl - posted on 07/19/2009 ( 18 moms have responded )

22

31

1

Last year we tried public school for the first time. My daughter's teacher told us that our dd has difficulty FOCUSING. I understand that to be codeword for ADD, but I know my daughter better than that. After a few months, dd started shutting down at homework time, something we had never seen and hope to never see again. After few more months of this, we went back to private school where dd went back to being a happy and engaged student.

Last week we met dd's classmate from the public school. I got to talking to her mom, who told me her conversations with the same teacher - they were the same conversations we had with her! The teacher told her her daughter had difficulty FOCUSING (teacher's emphasis), and the teacher convinced her there was something wrong with her daughter. So her daughter is now being medicated.

A few days ago a friend pointed me to this video: I am very disturbed by this. (Hmm, the video link didn't get published. Google "The Drugging of our Children" (Gary Null) if you're interested.)

How common is it for teachers to either use codewords like focus, or make direct suggestions of ADD and/or medication?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Julie - posted on 07/19/2009

87

28

8

it unfortunately is very common ever since ADD and ADHD became "popular" every child that acts like a child instead of a robot has one of the two. Now on my note i have ADHD have suffered with it my entire life so when my sons teacher tried telling me that he "has a hard time staying on task and focusing" i laughed right in her face and said he is a CHILD they get bored, they get preoccupied, this is NORMAL behavior and maybe just maybe if she pushed him a little harder instead of expecting every child to act and learn at same pace(he was leaps ahead of his class) she would see that he was not ADD or ADHD but only a normal little boy. she then began giving him different things to do that were more at his level and miraculously all his "symptoms" dissapearred!! another big one that every teenager and tween "suffers" from is depression seriously people stop trying to make all of our kids "sick" they are normal people and oh my goodness you might not believe this but they have emotions!!!!!! stop trying to medicate our kids!!!!!

Marie - posted on 08/25/2012

1

0

0

I have 2 years old son, he will be 3 years in a month. He does not have adisease that I know and does not taking any medication. He goes to daycare or Preschool. He teacher told me, he play hard he knows all the pictures they show to him but he is focusing when he come to reading and she is concerned maybe something is wrong with him like his (brain).The water come from his mouth most the time and his doctor know about that, I need help from someone who can tell me what to do, please.

Anne - posted on 11/16/2010

12

5

0

We had a similar situation MANY years ago with my stepson - teacher said he wasn't focusing, couldn't settle down in class etc. For 12 years of school each parent - teacher meeting was a litany of how he preferred socialising than working in class, didn't work hard enough, didn't focus etc etc. We refused to medicate him all those years ago. We tried to get him to study more - but his problem was not focus. He excelled in various sports - focus was fine there :) Now that he's in university studying something he is interested in, sees a future use for, and wants to do, he's doing really well - 70% and upwards - the highest marks he's ever had. I feel teachers are way too quick to play the ADD card - it probably makes their jobs easier to have a classroom full of medicated kids who sit and do what they're told. Unfortunately, kids have personalities and characters that influence how they handle things - and when you've got a class full of them, it isn't easy, but it's part of a teacher's job to handle it!

Joy - posted on 04/06/2014

1

0

0

For those parents that have children with a hard time focusing...
Try Attentive Child paired with Omega 3 (they have gummies for kids)
My daughter is a daydreamer and has a hard time staying on task but is not so much hyper active...I have been giving her this and it seems to be improving... I hope it could help someone else.

Rachel - posted on 12/25/2012

19

0

0

And Devon - really...? It's ILLEGAL for a teacher to tell you about issues your child might be having in school? They are doing it to help your child get further in life. No where in the original post was the teacher telling OP what to do with her kids. Yeesh.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

18 Comments

View replies by

Clint - posted on 11/15/2013

1

0

0

I'm very grateful to our daughters Teacher who brought it up to our attention. We waited and had our daughter tested in 3rd grade and sure enough… she had ADD. Since she has been on Concerta, she has been an "A" Student. She is now very organized and is a student athlete. So, do no go over-board on your teacher if they suggest you look into this. It may be very helpful in the long run.

Rachel - posted on 12/25/2012

19

0

0

I think you're being overly paranoid about a teacher doing her JOB by advising you of her observations. It is sad that it will soon become impossible for teachers to have any impact on the lives of their students due to attitudes like this.

Anndrea - posted on 03/08/2012

1

0

0

Wow! I came across this site by accident but it seems it is just a place to gripe about those people that spend more time with your children that you do. It seems to me maybe if your children don't have a problem with focusing, they definitely do have a problem with respect which they are learning from you. Wake up parents!

Sherri - posted on 11/18/2010

9,593

15

387

Devon it is not illegal for a teacher to tell you your child is having difficulty staying focused at school. How else will you ever know your child is having difficulties?

I have 3 children. 1 of which has now been diagnosed with ADD. The school has done EVERYTHING to try and help him succeed the past 2 yrs to no avail. Up to coming in before school everyday to help him with missing work, staying late, I am in contact with everyone of his teachers on a daily basis through e-mail and phone. They have spent hours taking all his work and sitting and organizing every paper into plastic sleeves so he can access things. Nothing has worked for him he is 12. We finally took him this year to a specialized counselor that deals exclusively with children with such disorders after 3 mo's of having the school fill out paperwork, ourselves, counselling it has been determined he definitely has ADD and we will start medication on Dec 2.

Our school never ONCE hinted that he should be medicated or had ADD. They did inform me of all the concerns they were having with him. We were having many of the same at home. He wants to succeed so badly it is painful to watch him literally fail and not be able to do anything to help. So I figure we will try the medication if it works it will be life saving for us if it doesn't then I will not hesitate to pull him off.

Cheryl - posted on 11/17/2010

22

31

1

Anne, thanks for the 'looking back' perspective. Luana, good luck - I hope you read some of the older posts here.

It's interesting to revisit this topic - the daughter I wrote about has had strong teachers for 2 years now, and has NO difficulty focusing anymore! She's doing great.

Luana - posted on 11/17/2010

65

9

10

I'm in this hell right now! my twins are in first grade and since last year the school has not stoped with the "we need to medicate them" speech. They do have a tendancy to be daydreamer ( like ME) and the teachers have only good things to say about them in every other aspecs of their school life it's just the focussing that's the problem. Unfortunatly we don't have the money right now to send them to private school but i hope we will soon. I wonder if they know i much they hurt us and make our lives hell ? Good luck to all of you and God bless our kids!

Cheryl - posted on 07/21/2009

22

31

1

Thanks for sharing. My misery doesn't usually like company, but it helps to know how other moms have dealt with this.

Tanya - posted on 07/21/2009

17

5

1

Been there done that. I totally cannot stand a teacher making a medical diagnosis on a student. If my son were not so resilient and happy-go-lucky - he would have ended up disliking kindergarten. We had such an ordeal when he started kindergarten. FInally I could not take any more meetings, negativity or special charts for his behavior. He is a BOY - he was FIVE!! He loves to learn, to share his knowledge with everyone. So I had to move him down to Pre-K to save my sanity. Smaller class size, and he could focus on maturity and social behavior like hand raising. But he got moved up to 3rd grade 2 months into 2nd grade because he outsurpassed everyone in his grade. So now he is back where he belongs for his age. And he manages to get a 98% average in school.
Take THAT kindergarten teacher!!!! Oh ye of little faith...

Renee - posted on 07/21/2009

3

7

0

I have four kiddos. My oldest daughter was told by the teachers that they think she had ADD, I disagreed and glad I did. She is a daydreamer, but she does not have ADD. That was back in kindergarten/1st grade. She is now in 8th and does just fine! I also have a son who has Aspergers. He takes medication to help with his focusing. He needs it. He does extremely well with it. I do not think kids need to be medicated necessarily for focusing, but to learn to deal with it. I have worked with my son for years to help with this, but the medication works well. I would have never put my daughter on it though, she does not need it.

Cheryl - posted on 07/20/2009

22

31

1

Thanks Devon, I didn't know it was illegal. I absolutely agree parents know their kids best. Luckily getting my daughter into a different environment "fixed" her focusing problem. Best of luck with your daughters! (Mine are twins too.)

Devon - posted on 07/19/2009

280

15

77

first of all teachers don't have the right to tell you that your child has a focusing problem A.K.A add. that is illegal for them to do. only you can have your child checked and it doesn't hurt. but if you don't see any problems at home like it, then i doubt your child does. now my twin girls were tested back in daycare by therapist and i was told that they fell into a high percent rate of having adhd. i just got them tested before school let out (they were in kindergarten) and they do have adhd. i am waiting on there test results so then i can put them on med's (which i don't really want to do, but they have it bad and need it) plus they are going this week to counseling. but don't ever let teachers tell you what to do with your own kids. you know your kids and that's that. good luck

Julie - posted on 07/19/2009

87

28

8

thanks cheryl i am an angry person by nature when it comes to my children lol and i having the disorder know the signs and he was not showing any so i would not stand for it!! i am glad she got on track because the next step was switching teachers and he really liked her :)

Cheryl - posted on 07/19/2009

22

31

1

Wow, Julie, I'm impressed with how you got your son's teacher on track with him!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms