HORRIBLE KINDERGARTEN TEACHER

Christina - posted on 01/19/2010 ( 29 moms have responded )

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So my son started Kinder in Aug. and I thought that he would have a blast with an awesome teacher and kids his own age and doing fun stuff..... but in actuality his teacher is more like a NAZI Drill Sargent than a loving kinder teacher that I had in mind. My son is one of the youngest in his class (5) and even though she knows his maturity level can never be the same as the 6 and 7 yr olds in his class she penalizes him for it. I feel so bad because he has such a horrible teacher and he doesnt like her and is starting to hate school. Since day one I have tried to get a different teacher, get counselors and other teachers that are in the school to help the kids so he can try to like school but nothing works. So i guess what im writing this for is to see if anyone else has had a horrible teacher that your child didnt like and what you did to help your child like school... or if you had any ideas. Getting a new teacher is not going to happen... so I gotta find new paths to take.

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Karen - posted on 02/21/2013

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I am sorry you are having a difficult time with your Kindergarten teacher.

Maybe the problem isn't the teacher, but that your little one is too young? Little boys mature at an older age than little girls. Your student is the youngest in the class, but he is still going to be held to "Kindergarten" expectations. The school can't really cater to studetns that are "too young". Maybe the big picture is he's not ready for Kindergarten? You could pull him out and start him next year. Teachers are responsible to prepare students for the future, and teach them achadmically. If he's having trouble now meeting Kindergarten expecations, how is he going to handle 1st grade expectations? Sounds like the teacher is being firm with him because he has a long ways to grow. No kid is going to like getting in trouble, but we can't just be concerned with giving kids what they want. I'd just pull him out of school and try again next year.

Kellie - posted on 01/20/2010

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It is not clear exactly what makes this teacher so horrible? Is your son able to do the work, play the games, and follow the instructions? If it's her personality you don't like than that's personal, but if she is not teaching the class, preparing the lessons, or achieving academic requirements then you have a valid complaint. Not liking someone's personality is a part of life. The public is filled with people we don't necessarily care for so this can be a teachable moment for you. Don't be one of those parents who singles out her child thinking she is protecting him when all she is doing is blacklisting him. There are lots of other students in that class but if you are the only one complaining she may just take that out on your son at school. There is a fine line between wanting to protect our children and being "over" protective. If you see the experience positively so will he. But, if you feel bad for him, voice your disapproval, and start to make accusations against the teacher you influence him to be upset too. When he gets home from school ask questions about the best things he did. What games did he play, what was the story today. Even if he says his teacher did something mean, acknowledge what he said but then try to bring the conversation back to something positive.

Irene - posted on 01/19/2010

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first i am so sorry your son is having to go through this,
now there is something you can do- make an official complaint, you probably think talking to other teachers or to the pricipal ect IS making an official complaint but its not, write a lits of everything you can think of that the teacher has done inc. the times you have talked to them and what was said, make copies and send it to the principal and the education department. official complaints are serious and if a teacher gets enough of them (here it is 3) they can be fired by the education department. your school isnt going to tell you this esp if they have decided to do nothing, and most people never take their complaints further than the school.
second look into changing schools- this is kinder, it is supposed to be fun not demoralizing, you might think this is drastic and that maybe next year he will have a better teacher.. and you might be right, but schools have their own culture and it starts with the principal, you have already seen that they dont take your concerns seriously so chances are later on if there is any problems they arnt going to listen then either.

Ilene - posted on 01/20/2010

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I'm really sorry you and your child are going through this. When my son started Kindergarten in September he had a teacher who was giving him such a hard time. Every day when I picked him up she would stand there and shake her head and say "not good, not good". She kept telling me he was either red, orange or yellow....Red being the worst, green being the best. She kept telling me that he was goofing off and that she wasn't happy with the situation. I went to at least a couple of parent conferences to hear her complain about my son. The last one I went to with her, she brought in two counselors and an assistant principal. The counselors did all the talking and told us "an IEP was best for my son". They asked us what his home life was like..like that was any of their business anyways. I told them I'd think about it...but the next day the principal could tell I was upset and met with me. She actually asked me to come speak to her at her office. We did and she said it was way to early and that she would visit the room a few times. Within a day she was working on a class change for us. My son has been in his current class since the start of the second month and is doing great. All he needed was a teacher change. I see you mentioned you have tried to get a teacher change. Have you asked the principal to check things out? Maybe she/he could arrange a class change?

Julie - posted on 01/23/2010

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I am sorry to hear this. But you say that your cild is only 5 and cant be expected to act like 6 and 7 year olds. Maybe he has been put into a situation that he cant handle yet. Remeber that the teacher must do what is best for the majority of the children. There is only one teacher. If you have put your son in school too soon based on his maturity level you are only setting him up to fail. You must be your child advocate BUT you must also realize when you have put him in a bad situation. If other parents are complaining of this problem, then the problem is not the teacher.

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Denise Tan Hui - posted on 07/12/2013

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Yes, I was also once in the same situation as yours, only that my child's teacher had resorted to abuse to "deal" with her. If you're certain you have never received complaints about your child misbehaving, then I really think it's the teacher's problem. But before assuming that, please do sit down and have a heart to heart chat with your son, maybe he is just too stressed, etc etc.

Jennifer - posted on 03/19/2013

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Wow, this is crazy! I have been wondering is it me, my daughter or the teacher and I am relizing just maybe it's the teacher. My daughter's prek teacher who I would love to put on blast is just way below the standard that I have for my daughter's education. The teacher showed up for the first two weeks of school then "something" happened , she was really sick we were never told but heard through a string of 12 subs, the teacher comes back and is just out of control with her class. Last week, at open house she told my of her big plans. I am like you have not done anything all year and now with less than 3 months away I am supposed to believe you? We have to become an advocate for our children.

Courtney - posted on 12/08/2012

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I am in the same boat and completely lost! My son has been in school since he was three years old. Before going to Kindergarten in his new school he never had problems with teachers or his peers. My son is in a small, private catholic school and is the only child of color in his class. His teacher is an older woman who belongs to the parish the school is associated with and initially seemed to "like" my son. My husband and I have made many sacrafices (financial) to send my son to this school and he (my son) was so excited about going to a new school and meeting new friends. My son has also been very enthusiastic about learning in the past and was reading very well by the first day of school.

Initially my husband and I were under the impression that things were going well but my son came home one day really concerned about the color of his uniform shoes. He stated that his teacher told him in our classroom we wear black shoes only and you should not be wearing brown shoes to school anymore. upon hearing my son's explanation of this incident I contacted the school office and they assured me that his shoes were indeed withing the guidelines of the uniform code.

One month later we went to a parent teacher conference where the teacher informed us that she had moved my son's seat to a different part of the classroom, away from all of the other children in the class. When we asked why she did that she responded by saying he was dropping his crayons alot and it was disruptive, she went on to say that he was also taking longer than she liked when it was time to get get his snack and as a result moved him away from his peers. Furthermore she said that his seat had been moved for about two weeks at that point and we were upset at the fact that she did not call us to report this change of events. She ended the conference by telling us how intelligent he was and eager to learn and that she would be moving him back to his original seat the following day.

Despite her promise to return my son to original seat, the teacher continued to leave him isolated from the rest of the class without informing my husband and I. When my son told me that he was still alone and felt bad I immediately called the school office to report my concerns. The teacher informed me that she was going to move him but changed her mind because he did something. When I asked her to explain what he had done her response was "he talked, I dont remember what he said but he talked and he is disruptive I just dont know what to tell you"

I was completely shocked and upset that she did not contact me sooner. She also made statements about the ratio of boys/girls in the class and admitted that she was overwhelmed. I asked her to begin keeping a behavior log that would document the behaviors she considered to be disruptive and she agreed.

Over the past week we have been receiving daily logs that state my son told another child he did not want to play with them at recess. He would not keep his head straight when walking in line to mass. He told a student who could not remember her sight words she needed to remember them and also that he called out the answer to a question after she had selected another student to answer the question.

I have a meeting scheduled this week with the principal, the teacher, my husband and I. But I am not certain if his behavior is truly disruptive of if his teacher is targeting him. I have never had issues with his behavior at home, church, karate or his previous school. Any advice would help!

Thanks for listening/reading

Tara - posted on 09/24/2012

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I have also just started my child at the age of 4 in kindergarten... he was born at the beginning of Aug.. he has never been constantly around children because all of my friends are older.. I knew going in that his social skills were not up to par when it came to other children. yet my child can have any type of conversation with an adult! He pushed kids when they do not respond back to him and the teacher is now sending him to the office. The worst part is that three weeks in I have to hear this from him instead of his teacher. We have already had a meeting with this teacher and told her everything that we could about our son, we seemed to communicate and understand each other... So why after a week and a half all communication is broken and I hear about disclipine from my child .? Is the teacher trying to grasp control of the situation without getting us involved or has she already made up her mind and has labelled my child a bad seed? All of us need answers .. Especially like me who have the one child and am not sure how to proceed... Any info or feedback would be greatly appreciated... Thank You

Toni - posted on 01/24/2010

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Try taking the issue up with the school board. They don't want the education process to be a bad experience. I don't understand seven yr olds being in kindergarten. My eight year old did a year and a half of kindergarten because of maturity she starfted at four. Maybe you could volunteer in the class then see first hand exactly what is going on. In kikndergarten it sets the standard for the rest of their school days so it should be as enjoyable as possible.

[deleted account]

I totally know what you mean my son started kindergarten this year this past August also and this supposed to be his teacher last year teaching. And she is a very ,very nice person very easy to get alone with nice as can be. but when it come to her teaching will that is a different story. She gives them new word every week 24 each week to know by sight for kindergarten that is then 6 sentences to read and if he misses just one word he gets sad face. If his name is not so neat r coloring is neat even if the work is correct he still gets sad faces. And if he get sick there are five number to call for her to call but she only calls my home and if i am not home then, she doesn't call my cell r the grandparents so my child's stays at school sick. And he is dislike school also.She is something else my husband and I am trying to teach him the best that we can at home to make sure he gets what he need so he can go on to 1st grade,but will be glad when this year is over, I guess I am saying to encourage him ever day to go that is almost then can move on the big boy class next year. Just tell him the same thingI tell my son that you have done nothing wrong, just try your best and be on your very best behavior and do everything that she as you to do. I try to reward him when he bring in good behavior and good grade. Just to show him that he is doing good and that she is not all that bad and he want to go back to do good go he can bring more good paper in and get rewards. But definitely get it.

Rhiannon - posted on 01/23/2010

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I had the same problem with my youngest son's Kindergarten teacher. She always said he had horrible behavior and would not listen to her or the rules. I had the school provide to me the IEP questionaire, had his father, 2 daycare teachers, his art teacher, and me fill them out. When there was a substitute teacher, there were never any problems. Needless to say, after MANY meetings with the principal, guidance councelor, and teacher in question, she was basically ORDERED to back off my son..and VOILA...problems stopped!!

Nichole - posted on 01/22/2010

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I am actually going toru the same thing right now. Not so much as my son hates his teacher, but I am starting to get fed up with her. My son was born 2 months early and his birthday is literally a few days before school starts in August (23rd). So he is by far younger than the rest of his classmates. Not only is his behavior immature (underdeveloped) but his learning is delayed also. Its expected. His teacher was really nice at first, but now she is pulling some stuff that is making me very angry. She seems to not really take an interest in him or his learning anymore, now he spends a lot of time in the office. Thank God the assistant principal is an ANGEL! We have head several confrences with her and now she sees that nothing is being done in the classroon to help Xavier. My advice is to not be afraid to bring your concerns to the administrative staff. Usually, they will be very helpful anf accomidating. Their goal is to get your child to love school. I hope all works out for both of us!!!

Kim - posted on 01/22/2010

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I had the exact same experience with my daughter last year! I could NOT get the teacher to admit that there is a big difference between a 5 year old and a 6 year old (and I know there is because my daughter is now 6 in First Grade and doing MUCH better!). I tried all the same routes you have tried and her teacher put her on this horrible point system. We just ended up trying to give her rewards for good behavior and consequences (no desert, no TV,etc) if she had a bad day. Half-way through the year I just gave up on the teacher and tried to just get through until the end of the year. I ended up changing schools (public schools in our area have an open enrollment system) and my daughter is now thriving. Hang in there...first grade will be better!

Samara - posted on 01/22/2010

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Call the superintendent of the school and complain, call every day if you have too. I cant stand teachers who think they have a power trip. That's so terrible, especially in kindergarten.

Sarah - posted on 01/21/2010

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my son is in 1st grade. kindergarten was great but this year he has a teacher that cannot hear in one ear, does not give homework and does not require the kids to be accountable for doing in class work (i.e. finishing what they start). i have taken my concerns to a counseler, speech teacher and vice principal. nothing has changed. finally i decided to join the PTA. i know it sounds boring but actually alot gets done and there are several people with the same issues. the PTA has the ability to change the school and will do what it can. if all else fails ask to observe for a day or more if possible take your concerns to the super intendent of the school or drop in for a meeting and voice your concerns.

Keri - posted on 01/21/2010

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My nephew started school this past Aug. alsoi and his teacher is such a snob. she has him sitting by himself. he came home last month and had an accident {a stinky one} he told me it was b/c when he rasied his hand to go to the potty she wouldn't let him go potty. then she sent a note home saying that he was getting to often to blow his nose. I had a come undone. I am still waiting on the one on one confernce. I don't know what to about her either. Excpet home school

Carrie - posted on 01/21/2010

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This happened to me last year in 4 yr preschool. My son too is young (Aug. 20) and he too started hating school because his teacher was against him moving on to kindergarten. Long story short I got sick of the comments and him coming home saying he got in trouble again. I pulled him from the program and put him in the public system and he thrived and loved school again. The public teacher assured me that he was right on track and would do well in school next year (this year now). I pulled him from our private pre-k program that my oldest son went to and this created it's own set of problems because this is the school he now goes to and my oldest still goes to. Now in K- he is doing very well, his teacher is not great, but she is the only one for K. I too feel like she harbors resentment and ill feelings because he is the youngest. I know it was the right decission and I have to remind myself that I am probably reading into things and making it more personal than it has to be.

My advice to you is, if you are getting nowhere fast...pull him, move him to another school or if you are disciplined enough...homeschool him. It is SOOOO important that he has a good foundation and love school...right now he is developing at an incredible pace and needs to have a good feeling and experience where school is involved.

Good luck!!!!

Janet - posted on 01/21/2010

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I hear you !!! I too have difficulty with my daughters kindergarten teacher, the thing is is that she is always pleasant and seemingly caring when in my presence, but seems lacking when not, ie... doesn't notice that my daughter does not have her "sight words" packet, doesn't notify me that she needs to return a library book, just puts her in the corner during library time and she cannot get another, and is making comments to my daughter that seem inappropriate, granted being a kindergartener my child may be misinterpreting the comments, but I'm still disheartened, as my son who is in the 2nd grade and attends the same school has had/has OUTSTANDING teachers I don't know what to do, she seems to like her teacher so I don't have to deal with that, I guess it's just something I have to deal with on my own..my thoughts are with you and I hope you are able to work this out.

Michelle - posted on 01/21/2010

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Hi Christina,



First, hang in there! It gets better :) I have a 6th grader and a Kindergartener (she's 6 and the tallest in her class). In our old district she went to school her first day of Kindergarten and was sent to the principals office her FIRST day of school for having a plaid skirt rather than a solid color skirt. She came home in tears. I lasted three more days with that teacher and we ended up pulling BOTH kids out of the district and putting them in the district that my husband is the Police Captain in. While it's a 20 minute drive, it's the best decision we ever made! Both kids are happy and doing well. Kindergarten isn't the sweet, coddling environment we remember it to be. My daughter still gets in trouble often with her new teacher but it's the way she handles my daughter that is most impressive...she's not going to send a 6 year old to the principal's office..she will take the time to explain to her what she's done wrong and discipline her appropriately. She also partners with us well and lets us know what wool is being pulled over our eyes. Even though she gets in trouble alot (for being bossy because she's so much taller/bigger than the class) she LOVES her teacher and her school. I'm seeing her blossom where I saw my son hate school in the old district. Many districts will allow such a transfer with Superintendant approval. Look into some other districts in your area and get her out of a poison environment. You are NOT the bad guy here...you aren't an overreacting parent. Schools must realize and take responsibility for molding our children's self esteem, education and discipline and if that's not happening she (and you) deserve better! The next step if that's not an option would be the school board (but if you're like our town, they are all related! No such luck there...) or a formal complaint with the state. Good Luck and please know your son will come out of this OK and unscathed even if this school year is a rotten one! There's always 1st grade!

Brentlyn - posted on 01/21/2010

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so sorry to hear about your son! but i would write a letter to the schoolboard! kinder is the starting point to if your child will like school or not! If he is not liking it right now he will be left with that impression forever! he should be haveing the time of his life right now! Next year he will not want to go to school and fear that it will be the same way. hope it works out for him!

Suzanna - posted on 01/21/2010

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I hate to say it but my daughter had a bad k- teacher. why can you not get a new teacher? If the scool will not do angthing and you have asked them too. next step is school board, after that news both tv and print ,why? it is wrong.& that teacher is telling that child and all the other kids past and future that they are not worth the time and the child will come to think of them self in that way.We moved Her to a nother shool and she is doing better.

Tracy - posted on 01/21/2010

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Have you tried having a meeting with her about what's going on? What About going to the principle about it? Don't let them make you feel like you have no options, get tough and don't back down. Remember if you don;t fight for your children, who will? Go to the school board if you have to. Voulenter in his classroom, and don't back down. Good luck. I will pray for you and your son to overcome this.

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My oldest son's Kindergarten teacher was a little too concerned about some things like coloring inside the lines. and sent home his first coloring page with red ink all over it. It's the only time we've had a teacher like that with all my children, four of which are in regular school now. It was just her teaching style and it turned out that, although, he is highly intelligent he had a learning disability and his sometimes bizare behavior had to do with that. He was simply bored and also acted young. We just talked to her a lot and talked to him a lot. He got through it and we got a new teacher that understood better the next year. He loves school and gets pretty good grades. He love science, math, and English. God bless you in your efforts!

Angie - posted on 01/20/2010

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My children have had some horrible teachers along the way and I found a way to get around it. I volunteered in the classroom. For some reason when I helped the teacher they always ended up treating my children better. Once the teacher puts a family with a child, it makes things very different. Going to the school and complaining about her will get back to her and it could make things worse for your son.

Evelyn - posted on 01/20/2010

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Have you tried to request a meeting with the teacher and the principle together? If so try contacting the superintendents office and request a meeting with them including the teacher. Is there any other school in you area that he can go to?

Stacy - posted on 01/19/2010

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I didn't care much for my daughters kinder teacher eather, she didn't seem to have the patiance you need to teach such young teachers. In MI though all the kids in kinder are between the ages 4-5, maybe turning 6 at the end of the year. Her teachers last year was the year she was there, I guess she releazied she couldn't handle all those kids anymore. Try working with himm at home, let him know he isn't do anything wrong, and do what you can to keep him where he needs to be in school.

Deb - posted on 01/19/2010

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I'm just guess...but I bet his teacher is older and has been teaching for a long time.

Older teachers sometimes have these little boxes that they think children should fit into and when your child doesnt fit there are problems. My son had this problem with his 1st grade teacher. Talk to your son about doing his best to meet her expectations. Go over her class rules with him and help him find ways he can adjust his behavior to meet the teachers expectations...but also let him know that you think he is doing great and as long as he is trying his best you will be proud of him no matter what his teacher says. Help your son focus on the things he likes about school to make this a more positive experiance for him. And keep in mind that next year his teacher may be awsome. Good Luck

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