How do you break a 6 yr old of whining?

Deonna - posted on 09/18/2009 ( 16 moms have responded )

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Our son is 6yrs old...but looks 8...height wise and I would like to know how do I break him of constant whining?We send him to his room and tell him to shut the door but that doesn't seem to help to get him to stop.

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Chandra - posted on 09/18/2009

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the best that worked for us was to just say out loud "when u want to be a big boy and talk to me right then i will listen" If they wined about something or asking for something we would ignore them and state a few times when we started this about acting bigger and not understanding whining. It took some getting use to but in the long run when the whinning started we would just say u know what u have to do, the whinning would stop an a regular voice would appear. If they realize u won't respond to that kind of behavor they learn quickly and do stop.

Teri - posted on 07/03/2011

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My 6 yr old just turned 7 he still whines some. He is old enough to listen so I say to him try that again in a normal voice he does and I reply. It has worked well. He even knows when he is in time out. I don't tell him he just goes and sits. We have a conversion of what's happened ans clear it up

Cristina - posted on 09/22/2009

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my 6 year old girl does the same thing. Know this you aren't alone in that battle. I have noticed i start taking all her things away and make her grounded with nothing and that is the only thing i have found helped a little.

Kimberlyann - posted on 09/19/2009

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We have our 5 yr old daughter, who knew nothing but to whine...she thought that would get her what she wanted...So, we started a "whine jar"...everytime she began to whine, we would pull out the mini-recorder, press record, while she listened to us repeat her "whine" , and then she had to put a coin (from her piggy bank) into the "whine jar". She hated hearing herself being recorded, she hated even more that we were mimmicking her whine, and she learned really quick that her piggy bank was emptying (she has no idea yet the affects of money, but she knew that it was coming out of her bank)...We told her that she could earn her coins back for her piggy bank by doing a "good deed" for someone else...each time she did, she got one back - consistency is the key - within a few weeks, it minimized, and then ultimately stopped...she still does good deeds though!!!

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Sheila - posted on 09/22/2009

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My husband and I say the following when our 4 & 7 year old whine. "What do you get when you whine?" The kids know the answer and respond with "nothing." It is short and sweet and usually works.

Angie - posted on 09/21/2009

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I tell my kids that I understand English and some Spanish but I don't understand whine. I ignore them when they whine. Soon they learn to stop on their own.

Tani - posted on 09/21/2009

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Your son and mine seem to have alot in common. In addition to having to remind teachers that he is only six, I sometimes have to remind myself of this. When Josh is whiny, it seems more like he is needing attention at the moment. I try to tell him that first I cannot understand him until he speaks like a big boy, then I ask if he thinks whining is going to help the situation? I ask what he needs and try to figure out why he is frustrated with the situation so we can avoid it in the future. This takes some time, but following these few simple steps can help alleviate a lot of his frustration and yours by just giving him a couple moments of extra time. A hug at the end also helps alot!

Darcy - posted on 09/21/2009

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My son did that starting at about age 4 or 5 and I fixed it by telling him I wouldn't listen to him unless he spoke in a normal voice and I would make him repeat himself continuously until his voice reached a tone that was normal/non-whining. I kept on him like this for several weeks until he finally was "trained" to hear himself and stop. I am a single working mom so I also enlisted the help of my daycare provider to do the same while in her care; that way the lesson would be consistent all day everyday. He's 8 now and doesnt whine anymore. Now he is helping his 4 year old brother to stop whining using the same technique!! LOL!

Emily - posted on 09/20/2009

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I have the same issue....I tell my son(s) I never learned how to speaking whinning nor to understand it. When you can talk like a big boy and change you tone of voice then I can understand you and give you an answer that you understand as well...

Deonna - posted on 09/19/2009

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Thank you for the ideas.I will definitely give them a try.He seems to think the more he does it the more I will give in...I'm far more stubborn that he is lol.Thank you.I will update on the progress with the ideas.

KC - posted on 09/19/2009

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Quoting Amanda:

I have a daughter that I think whining must be her normal tone of voice cause that is all I ever seem to hear out of her:P I just look at her and say Im sorry my ears cant hear that tone you will have to say that again, just dont repond to what they say unless they are not whining, I have threatened washing out the mouth with soap but never had to follw through but I am totally prepared to if need be.
good lu


I do the same thing about the tone.  As for the soap-I have had to use a drop of worchestershire sauce.  I have used that for innapropriate language after him knowing that it wasn't nice to say.


 

Kym - posted on 09/18/2009

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Totally ignore him when he whines. Takes a lot of effort to ignore (music helps) but they get the idea soon enough.

Leasha - posted on 09/18/2009

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my boy is 8 and he is still whining, but not as much as he used to because i started to repeat what he just said in that same whining voice "but not in a mean way" just in a lil smart a$$ kinda way...lol. he hates it when i do that, and every time he tells me to stop...i say "hey! thats what you sound like!, now you know how i feel when you do it!". sometimes i think that he is starting to understand why i ask him to stop whining.

so far its working for me, but good luck....i know how you feel=)
~hope that makes any sense...lol

Amanda - posted on 09/18/2009

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I have a daughter that I think whining must be her normal tone of voice cause that is all I ever seem to hear out of her:P I just look at her and say Im sorry my ears cant hear that tone you will have to say that again, just dont repond to what they say unless they are not whining, I have threatened washing out the mouth with soap but never had to follw through but I am totally prepared to if need be.

good luc

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