I need inovative ways to get my smart 6 year old to focus and follow through with chors.
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Monica - posted on 07/07/2009
I think it depends on what you are talking about. I do different things for different situations. Like morning routine/night routine. I tend to ask questions like: "are you going to brush your teeth next or put your shoes on next?" "Would you like to use your blue toothbrush or your red toothbrush?" etc. If I don't receive a decision within 10 seconds I decide. I know my son knows what needs to be done in the mornings to get ready to go so I don't remind him. I simply tell him what I am doing ("I'm eating breakfast now, would you like some too?" "i'm going to get dressed now." "my car will be leaving in 10 minutes, sure hope you are ready to join me then."
As for his chores, like picking up after himself, I ask him if he can do it or if mommy/daddy will be doing it today. If he says he will, i ask him if he thinks he can have it done by a certain time. Then if he doesn't follow through, i pick them up and then get put away. i also go in and take a bin of toys away as payment for my time and energy in picking up after him. The same thing applies if he tells me he wants me to do it. I do help him sometimes just to be nice, as my son likes to put it.
another thing that works well is the energy drain. I don't say anything to my son about things I know he knows he is suppose to do. If he doesn't do it, i do it for him. Then the next time he wants me to do something for him I tell him "Oh this isn't good. See I already spent my time and energy picking up after you and now I don't have any left to help you. Hopefully the next time you need something I'll have more energy and time. Perhaps if you would do XYZ for me that might help me get my energy back and then I could help." Just stick to it even through the crying.
Brandy - posted on 07/05/2009
With mine I just had to have her start out by helping me do things routinely. The key is to make it a routine. Then one day, this may sound wrong, but you play like your sick and ask her if she can handle it without you, she feels like she's being responsible. If sh'es like mine she'll be proud to do it herself.
Chiara - posted on 07/05/2009
It may sound corny but, I tell my 7 year old that we are a team and that her chores are a part of us winning. Outside of our scheduled Saturday activities, we do not go anywhere like the movies, park, etc unless all of our (me included) chores are done. That way we both win and can have fun.
User - posted on 07/08/2009
I have a 9 year old boy like that His mind never stops.
Lists help him. if she can read and write have her write down what she needs to do and check off each item as it is completed. My son loves lists. If she isn't reading yet have her draw the chores on the list.
Vicki - posted on 07/08/2009
Both my son and my husband have the same condition you describe your daughter as having. It's not that they want to be difficult or uncooperative, it's simply a matter of having brains that are not wired to remember all that stuff. We use lists at our house, especially for morning and bedtime routines. I find the lists work even better if they make it themselves, either with words or pictures. Also, we keep it on the refrigerator, so it's easy to find every day. Structure is a big part of my son's day too. He's nine. The routine changes a little in the summer and on the weekends, but other than that it's the same. He's expected to do his morning routine first thing each day, before any TV, computer, playdates, or anything. His summer routine list is: brush teeth, get dressed, spend 5 minutes cleaning room, eat breakfast, do homework. In the summer he does journal writing every other day, and math every other day. I'm not even sure what order he does things, because he follows his list. It has been a wonderful way to start our days this summer. There is no arguing, no negotiating, and very little reminding. Every now and then he will turn on cartoons first, or "forget" to spend the 5 minutes on his room cleaning, but a simple reminder is all it takes. I've also been teaching him that one of our family values is that we are a team, and we all need to pull our weight to get the work done together, so we'll have time to play together.
Vicky - posted on 07/05/2009
Go with her and just keep asking what she is doing, how long do you think it will take, what can we do next, anything along those lines and if you can get her to get it in an order she will remember it and do it without thinking about it. Good luck and have fun.
Aislynn - posted on 07/04/2009
Singing helps keep my kids focused on what they're doing. Like the "Clean Up" song from Barney. It helps my oldest three (ages 5 yrs, 3 yrs and 2 yrs) to remember what they're supposed to be doing and have fun while doing it.
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