Julie - posted on 04/07/2012 ( 7 moms have responded )
My step-daughter just turned 8. She has a little sister that just turned 6 and I have two boys, age 3 and 15. My 8 y/o has lived with us for a year and a half and we got full legal custody of them both in August 2011. She has been diagnosed with ADHD and ODD. The last month or so she has become extremely forgetful and argumentative. She also cries hysterically over the SMALLEST things! She starts up with her unpleasant attitude the moment she walks through the door after school. She has been difficult in class too. She is constantly in trouble for blurting out, not following her teacher's directions and has on several occasions ROLLED HER EYES at her teacher as well as myself! She is always bickering with her siblings and lying. She blames everything on them, no matter what. Today she used the bathroom and didn't wipe or flush, an almost daily occurrence. She lied and said it was her sister. Her dad was waiting for her out front (last kid to get ready, others in car seats already!) She went to get her jacket and dash for the door and had no socks or shoes on and simply said "I forgot." She has the same routine and schedule every single day (much needed for kids with ADHD) and I've recently backed up her bedtime because she is SO whiny and tearful. Every day she comes home and forgets to hang up her coat and backpack, forgets to wipe, forgets to change into play clothes, forgets to start on homework, even after several reminders. I've tried consequences and rewards, time-outs, loss of privileges, snuggles and hugs and on bad days, she just gets sent to her room until dinner. She has never been close to her mom and doesn't even want to talk to her when she calls. Mom has lost all visitation and it has been that way since October so there has been no change in that situation. We tried to get her in therapy, but the state denied her and we are struggling to make ends meet as it is. I'm out of ideas and patience!!! Her little sister was so severely neglected that she is having insane struggles in Kindergarten and will most likely be held back and I have NO time to help her after school because my entire afternoon/evening is consumed by her older sister's behavior and lack of cooperation. One simple spelling assignment, the same ones every day of every week, can take her up to 2 hours! And my Kindergartner's teachers are asking me to spend just as much or more time with her! If you do the math, that leaves NO time for dinner, baths or time with my 2 boys. Something's gotta change! Helpful suggestions anyone??