My children want to spend every second with me...Is that normal?

Nicole - posted on 06/03/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I have a 9 year old and a 6 year old. When I was that age, I was outside with my friends until dark. My kids want to hang out with me 24/7. I am a working mom so that might have something to do with it. I can't really tell them no because I feel liek a bad mom, but sometimes I want to rip my hair out. When they were younger it made sense. I guess I just figured that they would be a litle more independant at this age. Am I wrong?

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4 Comments

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Shawnn - posted on 06/10/2011

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Sounds plenty normal to me. They are away from you all day, and they want to spend time with you when you get home. Mine are the same, and they are 13 & 16 this year.

Early on, we established the 5 minute rule. They give me 5 minutes to get in the door, put stuff down, and catch my breath. Then they can show, tell, ask, etc whatever.

Independence is good, but don't make them grow up too quickly, or you'll wonder where they went...LOL

Jakki - posted on 06/10/2011

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Yeah! My kids too. They are 10, 8 and 6 and they are sooo clingy and want to sit on my lap all the time, and fight for my attention.



I just keep on thinking that suddenly they'll grow out of it..

Klara - posted on 06/04/2011

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I know my girls are competitive, and if they see each other anywhere near me, the other has to step in. Drives me nuts too. I think its fairly normal for girls. My girls are 6 and 11, and they both really like their "mommy time." I would say enjoy it while it lasts, but don't feel guilty about taking time away for yourself and/or you and your spouse. We all need a break other than just work. Keep in mind that its more about quality time than the amount of time. Kids tend to remember outings, special activities, etc. My kids even want me to take time off work to chaperone their school field trips, etc.. I try to, but they get very upset when I can't. I guess like I feel they are only small so long, so I'd better enjoy it while it lasts. Chances are they won't feel this way as they hit their teenage years. Good luck to you! Finding balance can be so hard!

Christy - posted on 06/03/2011

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Considering that you are a working mom, yes, I'd say it's normal. Put them to work! Have them working with you to clean house. It gives them positive attention they want and gives you help with the house keeping! While you're all working ask them about their day and get them talking.

Also, explain to them that you've worked hard and that you need quiet time. Whether that means bedtime is at 8:00 and you're done being a mom at that point, or whether you get a half hour or so to yourself before their bedtime, teach them to respect that time period for your sanity. It could be bath time for them, or quiet time reading before bed. Whatever works best for you!

Keep the relationships with them going strong. As they approach puberty, it's so much harder to get them to talk.