Sherry - posted on 09/25/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )
long story short - was with a boyfriend, got pregnant, broke up, and became a single mom 9 months later. my daughter has never met her dad, never even asked about him. she is 8 years old now. her father passed away a week ago. she has two older (18 and 20 yrs old) half siblings that would like to meet her and i would also like for her to meet them.
the memorial service for her father was just yesterday. i went, but my daughter did not. i didn't feel it was appropriate for her to 'meet' her dad for the first time in an urn on a table, nor her half siblings at such a time or place. i told her that this was a funeral for somebody i knew a long time ago. not a lie, but i don't know if she is emotionally ready to know about her father, and the fact that he is now passed away, even though he wasn't in her life to begin with.
do i take the initiative and tell her about her father, or do i wait for her to ask me about him? her grandfather (my dad) is very much a part of our lives and he does take on the father role quite well, even though he does the usual 'spoil the grandchild' routine a lot too.
my daughter is, i believe, not level with her physical age as far as her emotions go. she is quick to upset and quick to cry, even at small things. would telling her about her dad now hurt her or would it help her?