my kindergartener is having trouble staying focused in class. She constantly comes home with notes about not following directions and not staying focused. Her grades are fine its just the behavior. We've have tried everything to punish her but its still not working. She doesnt act like this at home only at school. We are at our wits end on what to do. If anyone could please help!

Tierra - posted on 02/07/2009

wow thank you so much guys. I read all of your comments to her dad and we are so pleased with your replies. We were feeling the same way thinking maybe she is just bored at school. We keep her busy at home and have little to no problems its when its time to go back to school the situation comes up again. Hopefully once she is in 1st grade things will get better. Once again we really appreciate the help!

Kellie - posted on 02/06/2009

I had the same problem with my daughter last year, everyday there was something else sent home and a couple times I recieved phone calls. I found that with my daughter, that she needed boundaries (she will see how far she can push people before she gets into trouble).If they kept her busy at school, then she was less likely to get into trouble. Also I really felt like some of the things they were teaching were stuff that she already knew and maybe was bored with it.  At home we were good and no trouble, but the next day at school it would be trouble again.  We are in the first grade now and things are much better. I really feel strongly that some children are just harder to adjust than others.

Sherry - posted on 02/06/2009

Another problem may be that she is just bored. If her grades are good, she may be finishing her work before the rest of the class and getting in trouble because she is expected to sit quietly until the other kids are finished. My niece had this problem and my brother talked to her teacher and they gave her some extra work to help keep her busy during class. With the extra work and age, she has grown out of it. With my son, now 4, I knew we would probably have the same problems. He is smart for his age so I knew traditional school would be difficult for him having to follow a set learning schedule. I got him into a montessori school and he is doing great because each child can work in groups or independently at their own speed. He cannot sit still to even watch a 1/2 hour show on tv, but he does great in class because he can move from one lesson to another when he is ready. He started in the preschool program this year and they already have him doing kindergarden work. Just something you might want to look into. Good luck!

Angie - posted on 02/06/2009

Because I have a child who has trouble concentrating at school, I asked my sister who is a special ed teacher - here is what she suggested. There are a couple of very easy things that can help children concentrate in school. I know that this may seem nuts but they work. It is important for children to be able to touch the floor from their chairs. If your daughter is small - this could be a problem. If she is squirmy, like my 8 year old, try buying a balance disk from Walmart. They run about $14 and they make the child concentrate on keeping their balance so they don't squirm. Here a link to what they look like http://www.walmart.com/search/search-ng.... You can also ask the special ed teacher at your school if a "fidget" might work on her pencil. The teacher should know what this is. Basically, it provides your child something quiet to play with so that she can concentrate and not distract other students. Good luck!!!

Jennie - posted on 02/06/2009

very true about what they expect from kids.. i have a senior in high school and the changes that have taken place since he was in 1st grade is unreal.. i use to think that the issues we were having was just being a boy.. sometimes school setting is just way to much for them to have to deal with especially all day.. our issues with our son was more than just at school but i didn't really realize it was a problem cause it was just something we dealt with on a daily basis.. good luck..

Mary Jane - posted on 02/06/2009

It's perfectly normal for a child that age to have trouble focusing at school. There is more academic pressure than ever on children that age. I would honestly not worry about it much especially if her grades are fine. I would try to offer her a reward for getting good behavior reports. That way she has a motivation for working hard to maintain that behavior. Maybe like a special day out somewhere. Keep communication open with the teacher too. I know my 4th daughter had a lot of problems with her 1st grade teacher with the notes coming home about not focusing or following directions then the teacher left and the new teacher hasn't had any of those problems so sometimes teacher's expectations are really high or they are less understanding of children's lack of focus for long periods of time. Work with the teacher on in class solutions. ADHD is something that happens all the time not just at school. If she isn't having trouble at home then it is most likely just a maturity issue or expectation issue. I would not seek an evaluation for ADD or ADHD in a child that age since they are still too young to have a mature attention span anyway. 

Crystal - posted on 02/06/2009

Honestly it sounds like she's not ready to be in a school situation. We as a culture are pushing our kids more and more to grow up too fast and be too independent too early. Maybe she just needs a little more time to be ready for school. Maybe you should think about pulling her out and homeschooling her until 1st grade?

Jennie - posted on 02/06/2009

this sounds so much like my son.. he did fine one on one and at home but get in a classroom setting and things fell apart.. not that he was acting out or anything but any little bit of distraction, he couldn't stay focused.. work was not getting done, careless mistakes, not staying on task.. we ended up having him tested for ADHD and he's now on meds.. i was totally against it but figured that we needed to do something or he was going to struggle all through school and end up hating it..

we didnt' start meds til 1st grade but it's made a WORLD of differnece and he's doing great..

maybe after this year your child will get use to the classroom setting and what is expected her and you won't have to go any further.. it makes it so hard when you are getting daily behavior reports and nothing you do helps.. i felt like he was getting in trouble all the time.. if it wasn't the teacher, it was his dad and i and his self esteem was suffering big time..

good luck and keep us posted on how she's doing.. this is a hard road for all parties..