Lori - posted on 01/07/2011 ( 28 moms have responded )
Yesterday by 5 yr old Daughter came home with a note from her teacher and a writing assignment 3x each I will not lie to my teachers. the note from her teacher reads " I'm sending this note because ___________________ has lied to us twice today.
I thought she could write these sentences at home since we didn't go outside and I couldn't take her playtime. I'll e-mail the details. Ms. _________.
I asked my Daughter if she lied to her teacher and without hesitation she said yes. When I asked her Why? she explained that her line back to the class room had left and she was still in the lunch room. But she told her teacher that she was in the nurses office because she was afraid of getting into trouble for being in the lunch room.
I explained to my daughter that it's always better to tell the truth and get into trouble than to tell a lie and get into trouble anyways.
I understand the punishment for the lie however I didn't have both sides of the story and didn't get a e-mail till this morning from the teacher. I didn't feel that I should punish my child till I new the facts from both sides. Also My concern was how did her teacher not notice that she was missing and did she not do a head count before leaving the lunch room. I'm not placing blame but in my minds eye if you are missing a child you go look for them. NOT countinue with class and wait for their return so you can scold them.
Here is the e-mail I got from the Teacher this morning I didn't know how to respond so some advice is needed:
She was about five minutes behind the rest of the class when we came in from breakfast. I asked her where she had been and she said, without skipping a beat, "I was in Nurse _____office because I have a belly ache." I told her she cannot just go to the nurse's office without asking permission and then I remembered ___ wasn't in her office and ______ was lying to me. I told her to put her name in the penalty box for five minutes for coming back from breakfast late and five minutes for lying. She had been fooling around in the bathroom, something she does quite often.
The second time we played a game and only the winners got big prizes. I saw one of the big prizes on her desk and asked her if she was a big winner because I was going to brag on her but when I asked she got an instant guilty look on her face. I asked Ms. Debbie, (who was in charge of the game), if ______ had won a big prize and she said no, she had sneaked it out of the treat basket._______ told me she had won the big prize and she hadn't.
If the second incident in one day hadn't happened, I wouldn't have involved you, but there seems to be a trend developing. Even this morning when she gave me her sentences I asked her if she was going to lie to us again and she said no. Then, within ten minutes, she was talking at her table and I asked her if she was finished with her work and she said yes. When I checked it it was NOT finished. I told her she needed to start thinking about her answers before she gives them and make sure she wasn't telling lies.
I've not had a problem with my Daughter lying much less taking things that arent hers. We arent a competivative family not even in sports. when we play Games everyone is a winner. I don't teach my girls to compete for trophies or prizes so I can understand the confusion on the game. i haven't sent a response to the teacher yet because I'm not sure if I am over reacting and I don't want to cause problems for my Daughter. How ever I do feel the teacher is the responsible one and should have checked on my daughters where abouts.