reactive attachment disorder
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Kelly - posted on 08/29/2009
Occupational Therapist works very well with kiddos with attachment disorders. Make sure you go to a Pediatric OT. They deal with these things all the time. I have children in my school who have a lot of sensorial disorders that you have spoke of. Good Luck
Jason - posted 3 days ago
My partner and I adopted a teenage girl from foster care a couple years ago. She has a history of sexual abuse, neglect and developmental delays. Even though we are a gay couple, I am the target for her hatred and anger. Recently, she has been on a solid two month temper tantrum - threatened suicide if we weren't nice to her (when questioned, "nice to her" means letting her do what she wants, doing for her 24/7 and constantly trying to make her "happy"), violence and almost $1000 worth of property damage. You name it, we've experienced it. We've hospitalized her twice within these two months. This past time, the dr. put her on Risperdal. It seems to be helping. She was completely out of it the first few days, but now something is happening. Guess we'll see if it lasts. It usually doesn't.
From what I have learned, the biggest problem with RAD kids is the concept of omnipotence. They believe they are omnipotent and will do ANYTHING to prove to the primary caregiver that they have more power. I have been working to close the gap on her behavior. I hated to do it, but I had no choice. I find that I have had to become my own advocate in dealing with services. I now point blank tell people that my safety in our home is more important than her wants. She understands that the next violent episode will result in my calling the police. Anymore property damage will result in charges being filed. Consequences now fit the crime. Don't do your homework, then fine, you're grounded to your room until I get a report from the teacher the work was turned in (whether or not she gets credit for it). It's up to her when it ends. It could be the next day, or it could be 10 days if she is attempting a power struggle (unfortunately, that was a recent occurrence). The last round of property damage (she took the snow shovel and scratched up my car with it) resulted in being forced to give up her four favorite stuffed animals. Stealing resulted in a locked cabinet to let her know that she is not trusted. Sneaking stuff home from school has resulted in daily bag checks. Telling huge lies has resulted in writing an apology letter and telling the truth. The goal is to get her to be able to draw connections between the bad behaviors and the consequences. I will say that making restitution for property damage with her stuffed animals was one of the few that bothered her. I told her I gave them away, but in reality, I put them in the attic.
It's hard. What people don't realize is that we started this adoption journey to help a child. Then suddenly, we are the targets of a hatred that no one understands. I keep trying things until something works. I've learned that no one size fits all in these situations. I certainly wish you the best. I know how heartbreaking a RAD child can be.
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