recently my 8 yr old daughter has being hanging out wiv the usual mates,at school but she,s started bullying 1 of er closest freinds all because her other freinds do...the girl who,s being bullyed is afaraid to come to school,i just do,nt understand coz tghey were close and they had,nt even fallen out
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Gretchen - posted on 01/19/2009
Well said, Penny!! I agree - whether they rekindle their friendship or not, the bullying has to stop asap. My almost 9 year old daughter was being bullied last year, so I saw what being on the recieving end does to a child's self-esteem. I e-mailed her teacher adn the guidance counselor at school to find out how best to go about handling it once it got physical, and the school was great. The guidance counselor set up a few sessions between the girls, and while they are nt friends, they are able to co-exist without any trouble. Find out if the school has any peer mediation or anything. While you are the boss at home, you can't control what happens in school, so don't be afraid to get the school involved, I am sure they would like the situation corrected as much as you do!! Be strong, and good luck!!
Penny - posted on 01/19/2009
Ok its time to be a tough mom. There are a few important lessons here for both you and your daugher. First your daughter needs to learn that being a bully is not ok. And the much more honorable thing to do would be for her to stick up for her friend against others who are bullying. What this will teach her in the long run is a great sense of self esteem, she is bullying because she is afraid of not fitting in, this is a crucial time for your little girl to realize that she is an individual. This is also a time for her to learn that she must be responsable for her actions, and that her actions have real consequences. As mom, you have to be tough, she needs to be punished for bullying, in whatever way you have found to be effective. You might also want to arrange some one on one time for her and her friend with out the other kids, so that they might re-kindle the bond that they once had. Encourage your daughter to create a good strong friendship with someone who will care about her rather than a fake relationship with a group of girls who will forever be turning on each other.