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Staying the night with the grandparents.

Candi - posted on 01/24/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My daughter, who is 5, stays the night with my grandparents and my parents every other weekend and her daddy has custody of her the weekends she is not with her grandparents. I am beginning to feel like this is too much. I never have my child on the weekends. My ex husband and I are set up on every other weekends, which we both agreed to. The weekends that are suppose to be mine with my daughter are spent with her grandparents and great grandparents. My grandparents keep her on Fridays and my parents keep her on Saturdays. I have no time to plan or do anything with my daughter. How often do your children spend the night with their grandparents? Also, I know my grandparents and my parents will be upset when I tell them that my daughter is not spending the night, because I would like some time on the weekend with her myself. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!!!

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Candi - posted on 01/26/2011

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I don't her spending time with them. I'm thankful that I have someone to watch her after school while I work. I just seem to get a pity trip when I mention I would like weekend time as well. My grandmother picks her up from school for me and keeps her until I get off work and I'm able to pick her up. My parents work and it's hard for them to see her, but on the weekends, which I understand. I don't see a problem with dinner one night a week or even them coming over on Sundays after church for a cookout and time with my daughter. All your ideas have been helpful. It gives me something to think on and see what will work for us. Thanks!

Mimi - posted on 01/25/2011

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my son spends every weekend at my parents house, if its a big issue they could spend the day with her and she comes home for the night or the other way around, your daughter is luckt to have to have great grandparents close, mine live 1600 miles away and they wont be around forever. That said if you want to plan activities to do with her plan them, you could always ask them along sometime too.

Candy - posted on 01/25/2011

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Tlak with them. Tell your family you want more time with your daughter. I am sure they will understand. Maybe every other weekend they get her then you do. Mine dont get to spend the night because their grandparents live so far away. My mom said she wouldnt want them all the time any way because it gets harder to handle them as they get older and she gets older.

Lissa - posted on 01/24/2011

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You are her Mother, you set the boundaries and your parents/grandparents need to respect that. You should just sit them down and explain while you are pleased that they want to be with your daughter she needs to spend some weekend time with you. If they don't live too far away how about they get to pick her up after school and have dinner once a week (one week parents next week grandparents). Maybe you could still let them have the sleepovers but take turns in the weekends and only for one night. That way everyone still gets a sleepover once a month but you can pick your daughter up at lunchtime on Saturday and have the rest of the weekend with her. You could also arrange some Saturdays or Sundays where you invite your parents and granparents round to your house for lunch.Maybe talking to them about family time with all you together some weekends will soften the situation. Explain to them that it's not about them but about the fact that your little girl will grow up in the blink of an eye (they will surely relate to that) and you feel you are missing it all.

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