What age did your kids start having sleepovers?

Karen - posted on 02/09/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My 7 year old stepdaughter has not yet had a sleepover, and is wanting to. I know when I was little, the kids across the street and I were having sleepovers at each others' houses when we were 4 or 5 even, but our parents were good friends and we lived so close... Anyway we haven't let SD yet because she was having some behavioral issues when she'd go to others' houses or if she had friends over to play, like the rules didn't apply if there were friends involved. She has matured a lot in the past year. I know some of her classmates do and some don't yet, and I think it depends on the kid and her maturity level too. Thoughts?

Also, when I asked her last week if she'd like to invite a friend for a sleepover, she asked, "Can it be a boy?" I said no, for a sleepover it has to be a girl. I know some people do co-ed sleepovers with little ones, but it makes me uncomfortable. Am I off base?

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Angel - posted on 12/28/2012

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My 4 yr old is having his first sleepover tonight, and I am nervous about it lol. It is with one of his best friends from pre-k. His mom and I grew up together so I am not that worried. The little boy has an older brother - about 6 and a puppy. I know he is going to have so much fun but I am so nervous.

Sherri - posted on 02/12/2012

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My son has been doing sleepovers with his friends for as long as I can remember and he is 5. At our house as well as theirs.



Oh and the friends I was referring too one is a girl. She is 7 and my son is 5 and they still sleep in the same bed when they sleep at each others houses too.

Sylvia - posted on 02/11/2012

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My DD started sleeping over with friends once in a while last year, I think -- anyway when she was 8-ish. I think the first time actually was with family friends, but most times she's gone to the house of this one school friend who for some reason really likes having friends sleep over. I'm honestly not that thrilled with it, because we have a small flat so it's really not easy to reciprocate -- I feel like I'm offloading my kid onto other people and never giving them a break in return ;). I'd say no to a boy sleeping over at this age, too, but I might have said yes when she was younger -- it never came up, so I never had to make that call.

Deidre - posted on 02/11/2012

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It makes sense to me as well to first be sure your child has great behavior. When I was growing up I was not allowed to go sleep at another persons house. I'm pretty sure it was 5th or 6th grade when my mom started allowing my friends to come to our house to spend the night. I, personally, am raising 3 boys. My eldest was about 8 or 9 when I let him do individual sleep overs. But he was 4 when friends of mine had watched him over the weekends. They had a boy the same age and I was working. Does that still count as a sleep over, I'm confused now. LOL I think big picture wise I would be sure of the other families Parenting style. Are they present at all times paying actuall attention to what the children are up to . Age 7, in my opinion doesn't have rights to so called PRIVACY. So, I wouldn't allow the door to be closed. I want to hear what kind of conversations they are having.

I have 3 boys and my friend has 2 girls. We spent years together at each others houses. Our children played great with each other, but when it came to overnights, I made sure my boys were with me and not with the other girls. Also as the years went by I had to be more aware, like not letting the door be closed while they watched TV. Or refusing to allow physical contact, especially wrestling. Honestly, though even when my boys have boys over my rule is no wrestling. There is just too much that can happen that situation.

Sigrid - posted on 02/10/2012

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I developed a friendly relationship with my 8 yr old's friends' parents, back in kindergarten. My husband and I allowed our 5 yr old to sleep over at his friends', and his friends were able to sleep over at our house. It depends on how much you trust the parents, I guess.

Kimberly - posted on 02/09/2012

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I havent had to reach this point yet but I think it all depends on how well you know the other child and there parents. I have a few friends that I will probally let my daughter sleep over at a young age because we are close friends and have alot to do with each other. If its people you dont really know well I'd start by having play dates then have them sleep over at your place first if possible. As for boys I'm old fashion in the sense that sleep overs are of the same sex, I was never allowed to have my boy friends stay over and def not allowed to have my 'boyfriends' stay over!!!! I know some people are ok with it but I just think its settlng yourself up for it being harder to not have the boyfriends sleep over when they are older if they do it when they are younger, I dont exspect ours to think this way but I do

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