What age is best to talk to your child about Dad

Dana - posted on 09/20/2009

Tell your son as soon as possible. His fathers condition affects him too. What if something awful happened to your husband and you son never knew, so never told him how much he loved him?? Never keep something like that from your children...

KC - posted on 09/19/2009

Ask your husbands neurologist about how to explain it so that a seven year old would understand.

Tina-Marie - posted on 09/18/2009

I have to say that you should tell him. It is more traumatic if he finds out in the middle of a grand mal. The hospitals often have videos you can "rent" on medical subjects, they also have counselors to talk to if you can't find the correct terminology to make him understand at 8 years old. I have 5 children with very different medical conditions ranging from 14 to 5 each knows about the others conditions and are okay with it, that way if they are ever outside or in their room and there is trouble they know to come get me or an adult. god bless and good luck.

Nikole - posted on 09/18/2009

I so agree with Melissa. Tell him at this age. He is not too young to not understand and I am sure he knows that something is wrong anyways. If you have to get a book from the library with diagrams to explain what happens to his dad and what not. Usually showing kids physical things like this helps them to understand better.

Lisa - posted on 09/18/2009

well if you talk to him and he will not be as scared and can go to you when he see on coming on and then he will think he is helping you to tell you what is happening. We had a very sick child and my frist born would come running to me when the baby would be spittting up so he thought he was a big help.

Amy - posted on 09/17/2009

Oh yes I always knew I had to tell him I just did not know how to bring it across. I will call that 800 number and go on the website for details. I have had my parents not tell me things that was wrong with my Grandparents and other family members even when I was an adult for crying out loud and it was horrible.I have pamphlets but am not sure how to bring it to his level. That was always my concern. Afew years ago my husband was in the hospital for something else and I did tell my son what was wrong. I asked my mother in law that time too what to tell him or if I should not. That time she said tell him and be honest. When I mentioned it this time about the seizures and other things she said not to tell him. I just think that is wrong. My husband has problems learning too. He has mental retardation Education. because of his birth. So there is so much to tell him and I need to know how to bring it across. I am not sure though if my husband wants him to know. He is private. I have so many questions I do not know where to begin.That is with how to bring it across. Do I say it alone so my husband does not know it. But then my son will say stuff to him.That is why I have not done it yet. Thank you all for you suggestions. I do appreciate it so very much.

Melanie - posted on 09/17/2009

Talk to him about it - if you son't know where to begin get in contact with your husbands doctor - or your GP next time you visit them to help you. They may be able to explan it in a way which you will than be able to explain to you son.



The mini strokes are interuptions of the bloodflow to the brain that cause temporary symptoms - they usually resolve themselves quickly, right? Just tell him that and then get him to question you on the bits (words/concepts) he doesn't understand. List some of the symptoms your husband has exhibited in the past.



Let him know it is okay to be scared and worried about daddy, but remind him daddy has had this for a long time now (I am assuming) and so far he has been okay. Don't hide the truth, if he asks if daddy might die and there is a possibility then let him know - but at the same time reassure him that his medication (if he is on any) and his doctors and you and daddy are doing everything they can to make sure that doesn't happen. He may need time to reflect and not want to talk about it for a while, he may cry etc. But the most important thing is he needs to know - put yourself in his place how would feel if you father was sick and nobody told you? Always one to throw at your MIL.

Debora - posted on 09/17/2009

i was told of a website i forgot what it is but excellusbcbs can tell you the one that has answer to health questions for adults,young children and teens .you can call them at 1-800-348-9786 this gives you the healthcoach line.

its great it has tips on healthy eating in game form for your son to enjoy.hope this helps u all.

Debora - posted on 09/17/2009

try this site www.webmd.com they can answer all kinds of questions for you.

Debora - posted on 09/17/2009

my kids have seen their dad have mild ones and asked why is he so shaky this was when one was 5 and the other was 3 so we sat down with them and explained to them in the best way what was wrong and showed them what his med looks like so if anyone tried to get them to take it they would know what it could do to them.then my oldest came home from yes kinder garden and said a older kids tried to pass it to her as candy to which she walked away and when she got to her kinder garden teacher she told her what happened but the teacher said good girl for getting away from him as he tried to grab her she started to hit him with her back pack to get him to stop to which no one in the gym did a thing .so the next morning i stayed there until her teacher got there asked the teacher why nothing was done to which she said my child lied to me.so i talked to some of the kids to see what they`d tell me some saw what had happened tried to tell but were not believed .yet they told me what this kid looked like so then i went over the principals head and told the superintendent about it and said if he did nothing i would report it to nysed[newyork state education department} myself for neglect to keeping children safe.

he has epilepsy.you could read those papers you have to him and answer his questions and then have him go with his dad to see the dr and ask the dr to explain it to him as well.this way he won`t be so scared if it happens again since this is being honest.this way if it happens while your not home he knows how to get him help he needs.

Jacqueline - posted on 09/17/2009

You need to talk to your son. He'll be able to handle it. And what if one day your not around and your husband has one. You should teach your son what to do if that should happen.

Janeen - posted on 09/17/2009

Maybe there are books at the library or site you can go to that will help you word it the right way. Also maybe the school counselor will have ideas or better websites for you, that you would not be able to find on your own? I hope this helps!

Idella - posted on 09/16/2009

I think you should tell him, there may be a day he is with his dad and he has a seizure and does not know what to do. There should be some classes out there to help your son understand and learn how to help in an emergency.

Amy - posted on 09/16/2009

My son does know he has seizures he just does not know what they are. So that is what I need to do is sit him down and go through the pamphlets and expain what it is and stuff like that. He would ask me what they are and I never knew how to explain what they are one of my friends told me to call the eptilepsy foundation and get pamphlets so he can understand. He knows my husbands health problems the blood clots and what that is but not the seizuers, he knows he has them but does not know what they are. He does not even know what the mini strokes are but I do not know how to explain that and do not know where to get pamphlets on that.

Heidi - posted on 09/16/2009

I think you need to tell him and be honest, but talk to him at a level he can understand. Kids need to know the truth, and since your son has already seen a seizure happen(which scared him) he needs to know why it happened. What if by chance your husband has a nother seizure and its only him and your son around. Your son could be the one to save him, by calling 911. I have always been upfront and honest with my boys about everything, because they are people to. Kids know a whole lot more then people realize and are a lot smarter then most people can imagine. God forbid anything happen to yur husband, but the reality is if he is aware of the situation, he will be able to handle anything what may come of this a lot better. This is only my opinion, and if I were in your shoes that is exactly what I would do. Hoep this helps and I wish you and your family all the best.

Melissa - posted on 09/15/2009

I learned when my Mom was sick when I was a teenager that my younger brothers felt left out because we didn;t tell them anything and they felt like they weren't important enough in our family to know what was going on and didn't know how to help or get involved. They suffered long after she was gone. Tell him what you feel he can understand and that his dad loves him. Kids know when something is wrong whether we tell them or not. They may also feel like an outsider if they are not included. They can handle more than you think.

Tiffaney - posted on 09/15/2009

You should tell him. My mother was always very honest with me and I love her to death for it. Be gentle, and explain that these are health problems that many people deal with and while it might be scary it is okay. He shouldn't find out by walking in at the wrong time.