When did you let your child bathe alone?

Candi - posted on 08/10/2010 ( 74 moms have responded )

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My little girl is 5 and I believe that maybe she should be bathing herself. I think it's time for me to step back and trust her to do a good job herself. My family on the other hands, says she still needs help. At what age did you or would you let your child bathe themselves?

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Nelly - posted on 12/07/2010

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I only allowed my children to bathe on their own when they turn 13 yrs old before that I think that there is a lot of fooling around. My children are 16,14,12, and 10 yrs old. My 16 yr old bathes himself twice a week the rest of the time I bathe him. My 14 yr old daughter washes her body but I still wash her hair every day. My 12 and 10 yr olds still get bathed my me everyday I don't think that they are mature enough to bathe themselves

Holly - posted on 01/02/2014

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I know that this post is old but I wanted to comment anyway. :) I have a 7 year old that has trouble with her hair. I know that it seems harsh but I still wanted her to try it herself.


I just want to see if she will surprise me.


I know she can but she cried that she,"just couldn't do it" Well, I am very strong willed and know what she's capable of doing if she just puts her mind to it.

So, crying and whining all the way up the stairs I told her that she must at least try to do it.

There is no,"I cant's" in my household. It won't work.

I know that seems mean and nasty but that's just the way I do things and if you don't like it I really don't care what anyone thinks. She's my child and that's what I'll do.

Point is, you want to let your child bath themselves at age 3 fine(I wouldn't leave a 3 year old alone in the tub though ;) ). You want to let them bathe alone at age 7 fine. You want to let them bathe alone at age 12-13 more power to you. It's your decision don't let what others say influence your decision as a parent. Make your decision and stick to it.

Who cares what others think. I know that I don't ;)

Amanda - posted on 12/07/2010

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My oldest will be 7 this month and he started taking baths alone around age 6. My oldest daughter who is 4 demands she do things herself. I still sit in there and help her when she asks ( which by the way is rare lol). My son has always done a great job, and if he needs me I'm usually right in the next room. I think if you believe she is ready than let her try it! :) You're mommy and you know best! I think 5 seems a tad young, but kids mature differently than others and she may be ready! Let her try it and go from there! Good luck!

[deleted account]

I was 6. My mom still checked up on me to make sure I was washing everything and getting all the soap out of my hair. I have to sit and watch my 7 y/o ss because otherwise he'll stand under the shower for 5 minutes without doing anything and say he's all done. My 10 y/o sd still has problems getting all the soap out of her hair, but I check that after she's out of the shower and dressed. If it feels slimy, I send her back in.

Jennifer - posted on 08/23/2010

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I think it is an ok age. But I pay attention to under the feet making sure it is scrubbed, fairly clean and dried properly. Soapy water is not recommended these day (far too many irritations). Also supervision is required making sure ones bottom is fairly clean before going into the water (even at that age).

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Christy - posted on 03/19/2014

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I began teaching my daughters how to cleanse themselves from their first bath. When they reached 5, they mostly needed rinsing assistance and techniques for avoiding soap in their eyes, as well as running their baths at the right temperature. I provided guidance.

Christy - posted on 03/19/2014

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I started teaching my daughters how to cleanse themselves when they were 5. I supervised their efforts with positive encouragement and put the final rinse on their hair while teaching them techniques to avoid getting soap in their eyes, clean under their nails, etc. By the time my girls were 7, they could take a bath that I ran for them, or a shower that I set to the right temp. while I was within hearing in the next room to provide assistance as needed. Now my youngest daughter is 8 an fully competent managing her own hygiene. I do tooth checks to make sure she has brushed them all well, and when necessary recommend additional cleaning if she misses some areas. I consider the development of self independence and the valuing of a child's need to assert independence, competence and privacy of critical importance for building self esteem. My children expressed the desire to care for themselves without assistance fairly early when compared to other mothers experiences it seems.

Holly - posted on 01/02/2014

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I know that this post is old but I wanted to comment anyway. :) I have a 7 year old that has trouble with her hair. I know that it seems harsh but I still wanted her to try it herself.


I just want to see if she will surprise me.


I know she can but she cried that she,"just couldn't do it" Well, I am very strong willed and know what she's capable of doing if she just puts her mind to it.

So, crying and whining all the way up the stairs I told her that she must at least try to do it.

There is no,"I cant's" in my household. It won't work.

I know that seems mean and nasty but that's just the way I do things and if you don't like it I really don't care what anyone thinks. She's my child and that's what I'll do.

Point is, you want to let your child bath themselves at age 3 fine(I wouldn't leave a 3 year old alone in the tub though ;) ). You want to let them bathe alone at age 7 fine. You want to let them bathe alone at age 12-13 more power to you. It's your decision don't let what others say influence your decision as a parent. Make your decision and stick to it.

Who cares what others think. I know that I don't ;)

Geri - posted on 05/07/2013

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5 sounds like a great age. My kids started washing themselves around then, but i would "help out" with one of the 2 shampoos, and keep an eye on how thorough they were. That said, my 7YO recently tried to convince me that he was done, but his bangs were completely dry! So i still sometimes "help him out" with a second shampoo!

Jessica - posted on 05/04/2013

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My daughter takes showers and baths alone and she is almost 6 she started at age 4. She even helps with here brother and sister they r 2 and 3 so they still need mommy there to do it but she loves to help out and make sure they learn to do it themselves too.

Nomzamo - posted on 09/30/2012

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My 3yr old daughter at times she insist on giving herself a bath,I still sit with her in the bathroom until she is done and I just double check here and there however she is actualy doing a good job already. I'm not planning to leave her alone in the bathroom just yet though maybe when she is 5 yrs.

[deleted account]

my daughter started showering by herself at about 4 years old she is now 5 1/2 and does a great job, she even trys to help out her 3 year old sister who of course still has to have my help :)

Sherri - posted on 12/07/2010

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You bath your 16yr old son I am completely speechless!! There is no way at the ages your children are any parent should be bathing their children. It sends shivers down my spine and I want to scream that is just WRONG on so many levels, I can't even begin to express.

Nelly - posted on 12/07/2010

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No I am quite serious I've seen other posts where parents complain that their children aren't hygenic I have no complaints. they know when its bath time and there is always a parent there so they are properly bathed

Sherri - posted on 08/25/2010

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My son does all the washing by himself and he is 4. I only help him with his hair.

Andrea - posted on 08/24/2010

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whenver she feels ready - but i think five its a bit young - my daughter is nine and i leave her on her own to do it but im still outside the room becasue she cant wash her hair etc -

Tasha - posted on 08/23/2010

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When ahmya said to me, " mommy let me do it myself". So I gave her the washcloth and let her do it herself. I coached her along but she did it herself. She was so happy and seemed proud of herself. Ahmya is only 4. I still keep an eye on her though.... :)

Jennifer - posted on 08/21/2010

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My almost 7 year old started taking showers by herself around the age of 5. She does have an older sister who would help her at times. The biggest thing is that you have to stress the correct way to bathe and the fact that it has to be done correctly or you will stink and you do not want to get picked on about that.

Carla - posted on 08/21/2010

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Maybe your children are different, but unless I was in there, there was a lot of playing, and not much washing! Bath time can be a fun time for all involved. We have colorful sponges, scrubbies, back scrubbies (they LOVE that one! We play doing the booty momba with it). We use baby shampoo/body scrub, so they don't get it in their eyes.

My brother was 4 when he slipped in the bathtub and hit his head and got a concussion. I worried about these things when I had children of my own, so I supervised closely. It just takes a second for tragedy to strike.

God bless, sweeties

[deleted account]

My daughter is 5 and we only help her wash her hair (it's long so we just make sure it all gets washed) and then help her to get out of the tub (though she does that on her own just fine, but she likes the attention/help). I go through a mental checklist with her to make sure she's washed everything, rarely does she forget anything. My 9 year old son I have to remind him what to do in the shower, first he washes with body wash, then he washes his hair, while the soap sits in his hair he brushes his teeth, then rinses his hair. Every time he bathes I have to tell him each thing to do or he just plays around in the shower! It drives me nuts that his 5 yr old sister doesn't need to be told each thing to do in the bath, but he does.

Deborah - posted on 08/20/2010

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my kids are 7,6,and 4. the 7 and 6 yr olds are both girls and they love to bathe together(which I think is FINE til they hit like 10yrs old) they bathe themsleves without my help except for the conditioner since they haven't learned less is more. I'm usually in my room which is right next to the bathroom and they leave the door open as long as theirs no company. My 4 year old also bathes himself but I pour his baby wash onto his loofa and hair. he does the rest. I never leavfe the room with him though.

Biljana - posted on 08/20/2010

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My little is 2 years old and she start to take shouer by her self ,want a bath shampoo ,showuing me where to put and put the shawer water.The problem is her back and hair she still cant put water ther.But 2 years is to young for douing all the job by her self.Maby somebody can help you,maby I did help you ,this is just experiance.

Charity - posted on 08/20/2010

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My kids both started bathing alone at 4. (Both asked for it.) For the first few weeks I sat outside in the hallway. Now (five months in) I stay close enough to hear what is going on, but not so close that I get the "mommy I can do it myself." Hair, I still wash, and before my youngest gets out I make sure she is clean. My 8 year old is very embarresed if I even go near the bathroom while he is showering.

Angella - posted on 08/20/2010

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I let my son bathe alone at 5. He's 6 now and doing a better job.. I sometime look in just to ask if he washed everywhere... and to ajust water if needed..lol

Laura - posted on 08/20/2010

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hi my eldest daughter started bathing herself when she was 4 i always stay in the room or close by and help when she needs it my youngest daughter is almost 5 and still needs my help a lot, so i think it all depends on the child. try sitting at the end of the bath and incouraging her to do it herself you'll soon find out if she is ready good luck

Etrezia - posted on 08/20/2010

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Started around 4 years. Put alot of bubble bath in to make sure. And then Sunday nights I bath them to make sure it is clean in the neck and behinde the ears.

Karren - posted on 08/19/2010

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my daughter was 3 when she started i just done the ears and back now she is nearly 5 and does her whole body herself i still wash her hair but i juts stay in there till shes done to make sure but i think you know your kid some other things kids are doing at nearly 5 i would not let her do just yet as i know she cant deal with it such as chewing gum she wont be doing that till she is 6 at least it all boils down to what you think your child is capable of

Darby - posted on 08/19/2010

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If I'm remembering correctly, I think my daughter was around 6 or 7 when she was taking baths by herself, 8 when she started showering. By 5 they are certainly capable of bathing themselves with minor supervision just to make sure they get all the necessary places properly cleaned.

Elizabeth - posted on 08/18/2010

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My 7 yr old showers alone, but I check in before she gets out to make sure her hair is rinsed, as her hair is extreamly THICK and hard to rinse. My 3 year old washes herself and all, but I still wash her hair, and of course I bathe my almost 7month old completly.

But I think 5 is a good age to start, that is when we started with our oldest.

Tasha - posted on 08/17/2010

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Five is the right age except you will need to still wash her hair until she is a little older but let her try that and she may surprise you.The other thing you might should do is wash her back sometimes and the back of her neck and ears because kids forget that those parts are there.LOL

Clarissa - posted on 08/17/2010

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I started showing my 3 year son the basics now, he will be 4 this month. I let him bath and then I go behind him and bathe him myself. It is a start. Same with my older sons they are 8 & 9 and they got it down now.

Tiffany - posted on 08/17/2010

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Hi Candi, I'm questioning the same thing. lol. My daughter is 6yrs. old. I give her a bath every other day. What I do is take turns. I wash her 1 day, she does the next time, while I clean the bathroom, or her room, wich is connected to her bathroom. So far she does a good job. I just neede to help her wash her hair.

Candi - posted on 08/17/2010

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Thanks everyone for your help. The past 4 days now, she has cleaned herself. So far, I am sitting in the bathroom to monitor her, which is working well for her. It's amazing that really doesn't need any help. I have to wash her back because she can't reach it, but other than that she does everything just fine. I guess she was ready, while I was the one who was unsure.

[deleted account]

my girls start bathing and showering by 4 years old. However, I leave the door ajar for baths, and I sit and read a book while they are in the shower. ( sit and read so I can be there to help hand them the soap and shampoo and to get the right amount.)

Everyone is different but my girls, so far, have been ready by age 4.

Jayme - posted on 08/17/2010

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i stared at 5 i been singing them a song this is the way we wash owerself seens they were babys an now the sing it too i stared by helping them an than leting them an cheacking them an well im hard so if they mised a spot i had them do there whole bod again an now i still cheack over them an still help my oldest with her hair there doing great now

Betsy - posted on 08/17/2010

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My daughters are 6 and 10 and they dont want me anywhere near the shower, which is hard for me cause I like to be in control of things, but i let them do it!

Amanda - posted on 08/17/2010

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also try shampoo with a pump it helps them get the right amount tell them 1 pump or in my daughters long hair case 3 pumps it saves from the shampoo goin down the arm and drain while they try n close the bottle and put it up or drop it or even get shampoo all over the bottle just a lil hint i found works good for girls and boys they have it in big girl and tear free shampoo and conditiner :)

Amanda - posted on 08/17/2010

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teach her the proper way of washing her hair and all the important areas to wash watch her do it a few times remind her of the areas shes missed and be incouredging my daughter is 8 has been showering since she was about 5 i still have to help with the hair esp the conditioner sometimes but other then that she does it herself so does my 4 almost 5 yo son

Tiffany - posted on 08/17/2010

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My son will turn five next month and we have started teaching him to bathe himself. He does preety good, but I still check his major parts and make sure he has all of the soap out of his hair before he gets out. I only help him when he's really dirty or if we were at the pool or the beach.

Claire - posted on 08/17/2010

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I think 5 is a good age for childrent o start washing/showering etc... on there own, I always stay near my daughter but she does a good job

Meriam - posted on 08/16/2010

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my eldest age 11 now,the first time i let her bathe alone is when she was 7,she can do it very well at that age and idont need to supervise her.but all this time i always told her every day make it fast! my 4 year old son i let him bathe alone,he can pourshampoo the exact amount for his hair but then he doesnt know yet how to soap his body,thats why i need to do it for him

Belinda - posted on 08/16/2010

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My dtr is 8 and she started bathing herself at 5 yrs old. However, I always wash her hair with the shower first cause they just dont do a good job of washing it themselves. After im done, runs her own bath and washes herself and does her playing. Makes them feel very independent.

Iliana - posted on 08/16/2010

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My kids have been doing it since they were five. My kids don't bathe (as in having a bath) we don't like the over use of water it takes to fill a tub. My kids were taught to shower. I bought them easy to use child friendly shampoo/shower gel. Huggies, Johnson's, and Aveeno have great all in one type products for young children. I taught them to start with their hair then move on to their body showing them what to do. After a few observed showers they to make sure they could do it on their own I set them free. Of course, I do make sure to do the odd inspection to a make sure they are sticking to the "procedure" they were taught. Sometimes they come out with soap in their hair. You do have to start the shower for them so they don't burn themselves and keep time but it makes them more independent and gives them a sense of responsibility and accomplishment.

Sherry - posted on 08/16/2010

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My youngest is 7 and i let him start when he started kindergarten, i just make sure he gets all the soap out and he is clean. My girls started at about 5 that is when they wanted to shower alone, and i still have to check their hair sometimes, it doesnt hurt to let them try it once and see how it goes!

Chris-Jan - posted on 08/15/2010

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I have a 7yr. old son and I let him start taking baths by himself at 5. Then when he was 6 he asked to start taking showers. I think 5 yr. olds are capable of bathing themselves. You may just want to pop your head in the first few times and ask her if she is ok or needs help. I'm sure she will be fine.

Jennifer - posted on 08/15/2010

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My son is 6 and has been bathing himself for about over a year now. I leave the door open some, but give him his privacy, but he is always in ear reach. I give him the one over before he gets out and then the rest is for him again....

Lissa - posted on 08/15/2010

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My five year old told me she was ready to do it by herself but she would leave the door open so I didn't worry : ) I help her with her hair then wait in the room next door so I can hear she's ok and she can shout if she needs me.

Annette - posted on 08/15/2010

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mine were 5 too when they started bathing on there own. but i would help wash there hair. and made sure they got certain ares on there own.

Amber - posted on 08/15/2010

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My daughter is 5 and I'm in the process of moving her to shower on her own. She lives mainly with her dad right now, and I know he's getting to the point where he's worried about giving her baths because of how ignorant the people are where we live. So I've been working with her and teaching her what to do, etc so that hopefully by the time school starts, all she'll need is to be checked over and made sure everything was rinsed off properly. I'm doing it more to help ease his worries than her independence. She'd rather dad give her her baths and to keep showering with me (there are so many people here that I have to double up showers with her to save water and time, it blows) seeing as she's not confident enough in herself to do it alone just yet.

Charity - posted on 08/15/2010

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i was letting my daughter start taking a bath by herself when she was around 5. i was scared to death she would drown.. lol. im one of those parents but after hiding behind the door for a while i realized she was a big girl and could handle it. i still washed her hair and reminded her what else she needed to do but now shes almost 7 and loves taking a shower by herself now. i still help her with her hair once in a while but thats how our children learn to be independant. good luck! as for your family remind them its your child and you are doing the best you can. and ask them how old there kids where when they let them do certain things... (it always helps to compare what they did with what your trying to do)

Amy - posted on 08/14/2010

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my daughter is 4 and a half and i started letting her shower herself about 2 months ago . she does a really good job but like the other moms said you might have to help out with the shampoo espeacailly if she has long hair like mine ! lol she will do a good job and love it at the same time .

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