Pilots wives with three kids...do you recommend it?

Sandra - posted on 01/17/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Hi Everyone,
I have two wonderful boys, three and one year old and I am getting the baby itch. My husband is a definite no but if we have an "oops" he said he would be happy.
He said he's worried about me being on my own so much with three kids, he's worried I'll go insane for the first six years.

I was wondering those with experience, what your opinion is. Not that you would ever change anything in your life, but is it insane? Is it better just to move on with my life and enjoy my two wonderful boys? It's not that I even want a girl, I'd like another boy....I just don't know.

I took a pregnancy test five days ago and it was faintly positive. I was mortified. I took it again today and it was definetly negative. I was a little sad. I'm so confused now!

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Hesti - posted on 01/18/2011

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I remember those 'days', it's terrible! The 'baby-itch' hit me a little later, closer to the 18-month milestone, it's apparantly a very general thing to happen to women when their kids reach an age where they are becoming more and more independant. I absolutely love the baby-phase, cuddling with a tiny baby against my chest or close to my heart in the sling, so it was particularly difficult for me to resist the baby urge when my youngest turned 2 and it really took me some soul-searching and brutal honesty to get over it, took me a while too...

Speaking from experience I would say there is more of a difference in terms of household and emotional chaos between having only one child and having 2 as there are between having 2 in the house and then a third. Only my personal experience though - no scientific back-up for that one! Its also tough on one being pregnant and caring for two busy toddlers, alone most of the time. My sister in law's 3 kids are spaced that she currently has one in high school, one in middle school and one in first grade, she has a travelling husband and works part-time, her life is just soooo busy right now as the kids all have different activities going on, different places to be at the same time and she is just running around like crazy and she is really tired all of the time. I know it may sound like a problem of the distant future but surely worth keeping in mind. On a lighter note you might want to take a sneak peak at one of the COM's 'moms with teenagers" pages - it makes potty training and learning ABC's seem like a breeze!! LOL.

Maybe you should consider the possibility of trying to 'fill a hole' with another baby? Missing hubby it helps to keep busy and distracted, but does it have to be with another baby? That said, once you've figured out (calmly and rationally) that it is what you really want and can afford (not only with finances but also with time and energy and space etc) GO FOR IT!

Good luck, being a mom is such a full-time job that we often neglect the part of ourselves being women with complex thoughts and emotions that need attention too...

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