HOW DO YOU HELP YOUR HUSBAND DEAL WITH A SPECIAL CHILD?

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Lynn - posted on 11/04/2009

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It seems like people think that educational knowledge is everything. And some of the most highly educated people do not have that patience and love that others may have. And I personally think that those two things are some of the most valuable things.

Monica - posted on 11/04/2009

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My husband and i was not together when my son was born, but he was in the program u was reffering to and now he is in a program at school but sometimes i do not think that they even know how to deal with my son. Like today he got a night school bc of his special ed teacher, bc she does not know hoe to deal with my son and she has been educated to so this. The principal said that she is one of the best and has all the education on it but i feel that education does not always teach u how to deal with a child like deavan on a daily base, bc of it does not teach how to cope with a child it shows u how to educate them the right way and every child is diffrent! thank you for the help and i hope u the best with your child!

Heather - posted on 10/31/2009

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My oldest daughter has social-emotional problems. She is currently involved in the special-education program at school. She is not his biological child, but I was pregnant when him and I hooked up. He as always treated her as his own.



How old is your son? Here in Wisconsin, we have a program called Birth to Three. They come to your home and work with your child and you. They help you develop ways to help your child do his best and to help yourself deal with the challenges of raising a child with special needs. With their help my daughter began to talk. They also help my husband and I become aware of Trin's need for a little more attention and help than other kids.



Trin's problems might be temporary, but I don't know. She tends to be hyper and unnecessarily agressive. She is prone to negativity and a very noticible lack of patience that is not typical for a child her age (her level of patience is very often non-existent).



What I'm getting at is that it's not always easy to help your husband deal with a special child, I found it frustrating because I was learning how to deal with her too. Children develop so fast and something is always changing, even in special needs kids. But the important thing to remember is to be patient with your husband because he will come around.



Look for resources in your community that will work with you. Personally, I live in a rural area, and with limited income it's hard to find places that don't ask for an arm as a deposit.

Maria - posted on 10/30/2009

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There are schools with special education programs available. It will be helpful for you and your husband to go together as a family unit and check the program. Get him involved so he'll understand how Devan feels. It's difficult to be in Devan's own world, and it's even lonelier being alone. This will also show Devan some encouragement knowing that your husband, the father figure that he'll remember, will be there for him. I know it's tough all around, but the reward will be great in the long run. Best of luck to you and your family.

Monica - posted on 10/28/2009

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Yes I had this child before we got married! I have not found any groups for his dis. but i was thinking councling will help bc my son is going to that. His councler said he is gonna put him in a group for kids to cop with everyday life and help us deal with his special needs! My son does like playing games and puzzles. My husband does try but sometimes does not have the patiants for devan.

Ashley - posted on 10/20/2009

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Is this a child you had before being with your hubby? What type of special needs does your child have?

If he has never been around children with special needs, he should be well educated on it. If you have joined any play groups or anything, maybe he should go along. I imagine there are some sort of support groups for that as well if you are not already in one.

I do not have a special needs child, but a friend of mine has an autistic daughter and her boyfriend had to learn how to act and treat her properly. It didn't take him long, and became second nature. Obviously this is different than let's say a more extreme case of disability/handicap/special need. When I was in high school I volunteered to help out in our special needs classroom. Very enlightening experience, I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

Have him get involved. If he doesn't already, he should be helping with anything and everything to care for the child. There needs to be a bond, and I think that will help. All children enjoy games, regardless of needs, so playing even simple games might strengthen that bond.

I am not sure if any of that helped or not, just what I thought.

I wish you and your family the best of luck!

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