Is anyone else a military wife?

[deleted account] ( 36 moms have responded )

My husband is in the Army National Guard and left for Iraq right after our honeymoon last year. Then, a couple weeks after he left, I found out that I was pregnant (our little honeymoon baby). Fortunately, he was able to come home for a few days while I was pregnant when we had our ultrasound and found out we were having a boy! He was also home for his two weeks of leave when our son was born (February, 2009). Now, my son and I are excited to have him back home for good in a few weeks!

I would love to hear from other moms who have husbands in the service and their experiences.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

[deleted account]

The time will fly by. I know that being pregnant for the first time is crazy and more than anything you want your husband there with you, but there is no need to feel bad for feeling abandoned. I felt the same way. We had just moved to a new state and I did not know a single person. Just be sure and write him tons of letters. When my husband was in basic training, I think I sent him a letter a day. They love getting mail.

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Kattie Lynn - posted on 10/18/2012

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my name kattie,



my husband is in the Army National Guard, just left a week ago to Ft. Jackson basic traning, we have been together a year on oct 11, 2012.. we gotten married dec 21, 2011. i have two kids from others relationships... i am having a hard time with him being gone, i am loking for ward to seeing him in dec for graducation...

Tina - posted on 09/14/2009

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My husband is in the Army (Active Duty), We are stationed in Kansas, he is a Cavalry Scout.
My husband and I were married in December of 2006, he deployed in February of 2007. He did not return until April of 2008. For those who hate math, he was gone for a straight 15 months (Except his 2 week R&R). He has been home for over a year now and we found out exactly 1 year of him being home that we were pregnant!

Sondra - posted on 09/14/2009

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Congratulations! My wonderful husband is active duty Army.....23 years. We have spent a lot of time apart and he has missed a lot of milestones. Keeping him involved in the daily events of your lives is really important. Pictures, videos, hand and footprints and a daily journal keep him a part of the important things in those early years when children change everyday. He won't feel so left out and like he missed everything.

I'm so glad he was there for the birth. I am a labor and delivery nurse and have seen a lot of wives without their husbands due to deployment.

[deleted account]

My husband is in the British Army and has been for just over 7 years. He has spent time in Iraq and although I personally (as of yet) haven't experienced a deployment, I have all the respect in the world for the families that have. And I wish each and every one of you Strong ladies and your Brave men well. Best wishes!

Emilie - posted on 09/03/2009

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A couple days after my husband returned from iraq for good I got pregnant. I am 5 months pregnant with a baby boy that I am naming Zachary =D I'm glad to hear he's gonna be home, my husband wanted to reenlist but I don't think I could handle it emotionally on my own if he went back to Iraq, so he's going to start college as soon as he ETS', gonna pick up work in a similar field. so farit's been amazing and we're so excited. he does have to get surgery however and i don't wanna leave him here but I need to fly home before I reach 32 weeks, or I'm stuck having the baby here away from all my family =( but my husband has been so supportive and amazing and he's tryign everything he can to get it done sooner.

[deleted account]

My husband has been active duty Army for two years now. We haven't went through a deployment yet and I am not sure how I will deal with that. Congrats on your baby boy and I hope everything goes well for you and your family.

Heather - posted on 09/02/2009

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Well, my husband is now retired from the Army, he was in 20 years planned on being in more until he injured his back, he was actually in longer if you count his 4 years in the Air Force. My husband was active duty and a Military Police and they were always the first to go when there was any need. I remember the morning after our honeymoon, at 6 am he got called out on a drill, I sat in the hotel room by myself until I got a ride home. He has been on missions where I couldn't know where he was, One time he was supose to be home when I was pregnant with our second child and I went to the airport and he wasn't there, he was in a plane that went down and I wasn't allowed to know anything , the red cross finally called me after about 40 hours of waiting to let me know he was ok. His orders were cancelled and he didn't come home. It is hard at times, you just need to keep busy and find things to get involved with, I lived on base and wasn't around any family so I kept busy with my kids and volunteering with different organizations. It is a struggle at times, but I think so worth it. I use to sit with his dress blues jacket on and smell him when he was gone. He wasn't around for our first duaghters first 2 years and I went through my second pregnancy all by myself. I wouldn't trade the experience though as an Army Wife. Good Luck with the homecoming and your son.

Leslee - posted on 08/21/2009

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My husband is active Army. He has been in the Army(between active duty and reserves) 27 years. We have been together 14 years, married 13 and have a 12.5 year old son and 10 year old daughter. He was deployed for a year when my son was 5 and dd was 2.5, and deployed again from July 2007 to July 2008. It has definitely shown me how strong I really am. Thankfully he was here for the birth of both our children. When he returned from his first deployment, they moved him into recruiting which has horible hours, so it was just like not having him home for those three years as well. And then 6 months after this last deployment they restationed him to MA (we live in NY). That satrted in January, so for the next 2.5 years he will be living there and the kids and I will be living here with him coming home on weekends when he can. It was a hard decision to make, but the best decicion for our family. He sacrifices a lot for us, as the rest of us seem to sacrifice a lot for the military. At the end of this 2.5 years he gets to retire! YEAH! Congrats on your new baby.

Laura - posted on 08/18/2009

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all i can say is try very hard to stay busy, it was the hardest thing i have ever had to do and there were sooo many days that i thought i was never going to make it to the end. Try to keep positive and as close to him through talking as possible...

Laura - posted on 08/18/2009

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I am a marines wife, I didnt go through what you have..thank god. I give you mad props girl, I can only imagine what that was like!! My husband went to iraq August 08, and came home Feb of 09. I have a 3 1/2 yr old daughter and it was def hard with him being gone. I'm happy to hear your man will be back soon!!

Nikki - posted on 08/17/2009

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My husband was in the Army National Guard too (he gets out tomorrow!!). And he went to Afghanistan last year. He left in Feb 2008 for training. He came home at the end of April and I got pregnant. We had our little girl at the first part of January and he got to come home at the end of January for good. It was hard to be pregnant and alone, but we made it! It's wonderful having him home! It was different for a few weeks (re-adjusting), not bad, just different, but it's WONDERFUL!!! I LOVE having him home!

Bonnie - posted on 08/12/2009

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6 years of military. He was in boot camp while I was in my 2nd pregnancy. We just got to our first base when 9/11 happened the movers had not even delivered our furniture yet. His first tour the war kicked off and he was stuck their indefinitely while I was in a South Dakota winter with a 1 year old and 2 year old. The snow could get up two 3 feet or more. Snow drifts as high as any building it could blow against. So strollers were out. Afghanistan was better for me we had moved to Virginia and I had family near by in North Carolina and it was summer so I had the beach. But it was awful for him. Then of course he always had little things he was sent off to do here and there when in the states. It’s not easy. I’m happy it’s behind us in a way. But it was hard to find myself in the civilian world. I didn’t realize I felt my identity was a military wife and mother and it made me feel brave and strong because all I could do on my own. Then my title was taken away. I think he went through the same thing. I don’t think a civilian would understand that.

Kirsten - posted on 08/07/2009

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Wow... sounds just like my life... My husband is in the National Guard and we too got married just before he left for Iraq and found out we were having a honeymoon baby a couple weeks after he left... He left later then his unit because he was in AIT when they all left but he is coming back after 9 months with his unit this weekend... He was here for his R&R shortly after we found out we were having a boy! he helped me get everything ready for our son as much as possible and now he will be back for the birth unless I go into labor before monday... I am due in just a couple weeks so it is possible but hopefully unlikely... We are both so excited for his return and our sons arrival... congrats on your new baby and we hope for the best for your newly expanded family

Jessica - posted on 08/06/2009

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My husband is Navy. We were able to secure shore duty at this command- which made it perfect timing to start a family. Before we were in Hawaii and he was sent on sub deployment after deployment.

Congrats on your baby boy! Thank you and your husband for your service. Trust me- being married to the military you're somewhat in the military yourself. LOL

Ashley - posted on 08/02/2009

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My husband is a Marine, hes been in about 6 1/2 years he wasnt deployed when we had our little girl thank goodness :)

Jamie - posted on 08/01/2009

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My husband has been in the military for about a year and a half. We're facing our first deployment in just a few short months. Thankfully I'm not pregnant right now but we do have plans to try our hardest to get pregnant while he is home on R&R so he'll be home in time for the last trimester and the birth, and to help me care for our two daughters when I'm as big as a house! :)

Rachel - posted on 08/01/2009

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HI. My husband re-enlisted this last march after being out for 8 yrs..we just got orders to go to Texas.

Nedis - posted on 08/01/2009

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To ALL the Military Wives:

I applaude you!!! people don't think of it as if one spouse is active duty, the whole family is involved. My husband spend 6 yrs Air Force~I was NOT cut out to be a military wife!! But I appreciate each and every one of YOU that are married to the military spouse...you serve just as hard in a different way then the deployed!!

Thank You. Nedis

Robin - posted on 07/31/2009

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Yes, my husband is currently serving our country in Baghdad. He is also in the Army National Guard! Hopefully he will be back home in early December. Congratulations on the birth of your baby boy!!!

Inez - posted on 07/31/2009

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my husband is in the navy he left for basic and school in the begining of my pregnancy and made it home just in time to see her born. it was hard to go through all of it by myself. but it did make me stronger. but i know everything he is doing is for me and our baby girl.

Maly - posted on 07/29/2009

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My husband was honorably discharged from the NG two years ago, but right before then, there was talk that his company was being deployed to Texas for training and then going straight to Iraq so nobody knew if he was to go with them or stay behind for the extra two months he had left and we were 6-7 months pregnant with our first as well. It was a trying time and finally right before the baby was due, they decided it wasn't worth it for him to be trained for Iraq and never even go. I was so glad to have him with me as I don't know what I would've done. You women are so brave!

Sarah - posted on 07/24/2009

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:), We share a boat! My husband and I are also having a little hunnymoon baby! A girl! We are also sepperated right now and have been for all of the last 6 months except for 9 and a half days.We are hoping he will be home for the birth of our little girl but we will see :). What ever happens I know that we are ok! We also have a 2 year old that came to us thru me! She was the blessing that came out of my first marriage. Thank you for sharing your story :D. I love hearing so many military wives stories. We are such a beautiful and unusual group. No one else can understand the life of a military wife but we can and that's so special. What a unique group of women God has placed to gether for such a time as this that our world is now facing. Thank you for being so strong and supporting your husband in his choices of a military life, at least for now. Our country needs us as much as they need our men. No man is as good as he can be with out a wife supporting his arms. Thank you Katie, and one day they will thank your son even though he may have no idea why. :) God bless you and your husband and your son and any more that may come in the future. :)
Sarah Beardsley

Lisa - posted on 07/24/2009

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My husband is in the Army National Guard! The hardest thing I went through was when my husband left for basic and A.I.T for 5 1/2 months.At that time we were married 9 years! This was new to both of us! I cried all the time! I loved our talks and him sleeping next to me. And all you ladies now that you really don't hear from your man at first to much. I thought time slowed down. I tried to stay busy and do thing with the kids and work out with my sister in law. It was rough but I think it made me a stronger person! I have not had to go through being prego with my man deployed so to all of you that have kodus to you! My youngest was 4 at the time my husband left for basic and I am a mother of four! Congrat on the little one!

Beth - posted on 07/24/2009

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my husband is also in the National Guard and he is in Iraq right now. How did u get through the deployment? we have a two year old daughter and this is the hardest thing i have ever had to do. He just had his two week leave and left sunday to go back. I swear all i do is cry! Any advice on how to deal with it all?

Kandace - posted on 07/24/2009

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Hi Katie, my husband is in the Marines, but nothing yet like that! I am pregnant with our second baby that is due in December... But no word on deployments yet (fingers crossed!!) Hoping he doesn't have to leave beofre the baby is born! We also have a 2 year old. But we just got to our first duty station, so I am excited to finally have him home with us, he has been training and at school for like 10 months. (we've seen him but not much).

Wendy - posted on 07/24/2009

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My hubby is in the Navy!!!!
He was there for all of our stuff - by the grace of God! He did get excused for the pregnancy of my middle son and some of the late nights up screaming and doctor visits - blah blah blah. We wives know how it is.
Now we are coming up on our 12 year anniv. Shortly after that he will be mving to DC while we stay in VA. That's great in some ways. We will have a gettaway in DC and see him on the weekends. That's better than him being deployed again and not being reachable. I try to stay on the positive side of this cuz I need to. I don't have energy to waste on being mad or upset! LOL I have kids, a business, exchange students coming in and ME to worry about! LOL

We have our fun and hope it carries us through.

Good luck and remember - focus on love and life while he is around!
Cuz he can be taken at a moments notice!

Your sister wife - Wendy

Amber - posted on 07/23/2009

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I guess Im kind of in this situation! I am 29 wks prego and my DH just left this week for 8 wks of basic training! He joined the USCG! I couldnt be more proud of him! Yet Im also mad b/c I feel abandoned! I know he didnt do it on purpose and this seems so selfish of me, But Im scared out my mind about everything! Especially the fear of the unknowing! But congrats on your bundle of joy! Cant wait for our daughter (1st child) to be here!

[deleted account]

My husband use to be in the Air Force. He got out in 2005. We went through two deployments, and I know they can be hard. His first one was to Kuwait and he left the day after we found out I was pregnant with our first baby. He was gone for 6 months. He left again when our son was 9 months for Pakistan and was gone for right at 4 months. He made it back just in time for his 1st birthday. I have so much respect for military wives. I know how hard it can be. Many people don't realize that you guys struggle through the deployments too. Stay strong girls.

Heather - posted on 04/26/2009

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Yep for 4 years now! It was so hard both times he was deployed lucky for me we planned the pregnancy so we got pregnant when he knew that we would be here for the birth and up to a year or so.

[deleted account]

My hubby joined the army 2 years ago. He's graduating from EOD school in a few weeks. We have a daughter who will be 4 in May, and our second baby is due July 3rd!

Lori Jim - posted on 04/21/2009

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Go Army! My husband just retired with his 20 years. You were lucky he got to come home for the birth. Congratulations on the new baby and on having your hubby back full time. It is such a relief when they come back and you know they are safe and sound right where they should be, with you and their family. Good luck and best wishes for the future.

Amanda - posted on 04/20/2009

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my husband is active duty Navy. we havent had to go through a deployment yet, just alot of canceled plans, he didnt even get to be there when our baby was born because he was at his A School and i had to call the red cross to inform him so they would even let him leave and he got to come the day after and stay 10 days now were just waiting to go to Norfolk!

Erica - posted on 04/20/2009

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My husband is also in the Army National Guard and when he left in October I was 7 months pregnant. Unfortunatly he didnt get to come home for the birth. :( My mom was with in the delivery room with me. We were going to have the birth through live webcam. but I couldnt get ahold of him fast enough through Red Cross and my labor was only 2 hours and 38 minutes. But my son is now almost 4 months old and my husband just got back to Afghanistan from his 2 week R & R. It went by too fast. It was so good to have him home though. And we can't wait to see him again in October!!

Lynn - posted on 04/14/2009

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I can not say that my husband and I have been in that situation. But i just want to tell you congratulations. Congratulations to the Joy of having a boy. And congratulations for being married to a man that is fighting to keep us americans safe. I really appreciate each and every solider over there.

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