Pregnant and cant stop having dreams about my hubby cheating.

Angela - posted on 12/04/2009 ( 40 moms have responded )

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I am pregnant with my third. I am not jealous and know my husband would never cheat, but every pregnancy I cant help but have dreams of him and other women. They are really bad sometimes I wake up hysterical and I am a mess for the rest of the day. I hate these feelings and they usually always pass after I deliver. Has anyone else experienced this?

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Noelle - posted on 03/17/2010

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absolutely its just insecurities about being pregnant, its common I find the best thing is to talk about it my husband and i always kid about it, and the he reassures me.

Courtney - posted on 02/02/2013

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i am 22 weeks pregnant with my 2nd child. about once a week i have dreams about my husband cheating. he never has before and he's a great husband and father. he works and comes straight home so i know he not cheating. i thing its because we begin to feel insecure about ourselves as our bobies begin to change. i havent told him about the dreams. He tells me multiple times a day that seeing the woman he loves carrying his child is the most beautiful thing in the world. He always tells me how beautiful i am, especially with our child growing insde his wife, he says every man feels the same way about the woman they love. my hudband and me are very open with eachother, so even if your husband doent tell you what you deserve to hear, he thinks it every time he looks at you or thinks about you. i think the nightmares are normal honey. your beautil!

Lynn - posted on 06/20/2011

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Angela, keep in mind if you check out this website posted by Diana, that this website is full of one persons opinions, not of facts.

[deleted account]

Thanks for all the honest responses, ladies! This is my 3rd pregnancy (I'm 7 months) and I have had horrible dreams of my husband cheating. This happened during my last pregnancy as well. It's so frustrating to wake up in the morning and be emotionally spent, and still feel those "angry" feelings toward a husband who has done nothing at all. I just wish it didn't feel so realistic after waking up. I definitely feel that the less attractive we feel, the later in pregnancy, it can get worse. It seems to be especially bad this pregnancy considering I've put on more weight than my other pregnancies and know that my husband doesn't feel the same attraction as he used to. I just keep reminding us both of how wonderful it will be when I'm physically attractive again (post pregnancy) and we can both enjoy each other more. :) Best of luck to you all, and just remember that it will get much better once the hormones are settled again! :)

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Lauren - posted on 08/02/2013

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yes, im carrying my first child and im having dreams and also found some texts for 6 years ago from his ex and even though i been with my partner to 2 years now im paranoid that he is going to cheat and i cant stop thinking about it and end up in tears all day ho can it stop i need help

Louise - posted on 09/24/2012

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I had exactly the same thing it was horrible!!!!! i think it is a case of ur hormones and that u feel more vulnerable when ur pregnant, i had other strange dreams too but that one was reoccurring

Lynn - posted on 08/31/2012

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What a dream is, is a story your mind makes up. It is not something thats going to happen, in my opinion. I have had dreams I can fly, well, my feet are still firmly on the ground. I have had dreams that a unicorn died in my living room... well... i dont have to explain how unreal that one is....

When you lay in bed, do you ever think negative about yourself? could it be your negative thoughts about yourself, carrying over into your dreams?

Gabby - posted on 08/28/2012

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Pretty late into the conversation but i am 18 & going through my first pregnancy. I have also had these dreams of my husband cheating and i feel really insecure about my self and his feelings for me. i dont know how to react to these dreams and.would like someones opinion.

User - posted on 07/20/2011

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I am pregnant with my first child and i have been having the same dreams of my husband cheating on me sometimes night after night and ur right it messes me up too all types of thoughts. I hope they pass maybe its the overwhelming hormones and emotions of pregnancy ...

Marcie - posted on 03/18/2010

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I did both times around.lol, and man it is no joke. I remember the first one i was driving the car and got stuck in this sand, and then i walked through a hole or something and it ended up turning into me standing in the bedroom door way with my husband in bed with another women i had worked with years ago, just b-4 i woke up all my teeth started falling out.lol it felt so real and i am so afraid of loseing any of my teeth so i do know how u feel. But that wasn't the only one that was just the first one i had got that was with my first child.

Rose - posted on 03/16/2010

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I have these dreams alot. I hear it is cause your body is changing and you get more insecurities its normal. I tell my hubby about it we cuddle for a bit and he makes me feel better! He is great like that!

Rebekah - posted on 03/13/2010

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yes, but for me it was because i have low self-esteem. so i still have those dreams.

CINDI - posted on 03/11/2010

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yes mam i am also pregnant and having these awfull dreams i dreamed he cheated with my sister its a reacurring dream and thats cuz he cant stand her he thinks she is abnoxious and ill mannered and i also dreamed he cheated with another mom at my sons school and he doesnt even know this one. so i looked up a dream interpreter for pregant women and here is what it said in a nut shell your pregnant and full of extra hormones that will mess with your subconsious mind like that dream interprets that subcosiously we are afraid of abandonment so when you have another dream like that instead of feeling angry put your arm around your husband and tell him you love him i always ask my husband for a hug when i have a bad dream like that its reassuring some how

Lynn - posted on 01/06/2010

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I am very happy that you are all being encouraging and reassuring Miss Angela that you have had these problems before and that its ok. And Thank you Angela for opening up and sharing this with us.

[deleted account]

I had very insecure feelings my first couple months of pregnancy. I felt so vulnerable and worried about what if my husband would cheat - even though I knew he wouldn't. I heard about dreams where you dream your spouse is cheating or that you even are. I dreamt that I was cheating on him once! That was very freaky.

Chelsea - posted on 01/05/2010

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even if you cant feel it, your self esteem is low, i had the same problem, i felt like crap about my looks, usually people dont think they feel that way, but your head wanders sometimes like as if he'll be distracted by prettier women, you think it once, and boom, dreams break loose. i think its just those baby dreaming issues, how dreams just get wild and crazy while pregnant. try thinking one happy thought before going to sleep and repeat it in your head.

Nicole - posted on 01/05/2010

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I was doing the same thing. I would tell him of these dreams I was having. Bursting with tears My husband could see this and he felt bad. What are they to do? You feel ugly, fat, you ache. I few things that we did and it made me feel so much better about myself. Have you hubby get some washable paint or chocolate and have him paint your belly. It was so much fun I really felt like he appreciated it!! He also took a picture of me in my undies with my hands covering my breast's, so all you see is my belly. I was about 8 1/2 months pregnant and he still likes this picture!! Hope some of these help keep your mind off things. Do more things together when you have free time.

Stephanie - posted on 01/05/2010

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LOL I laugh cause that was soooo me....every single night he was doing some other chick in my dreams....

Nikki - posted on 01/04/2010

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Hey, yes, I had the same! I read that the sheer amount of extra hormones rushing around your body will make you have crazy dreams, especially from the 2nd trimester onwards. Mine were very random, cheating boyfriend, things going horribly wrong in labour - all the worst possible things to dream about! Most of the time, I'd wake up more tired after a long sleep, just because of the mad dreams! Good luck with it all honey x

Heather - posted on 01/02/2010

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I did this horrible with my last pregnancy. I didn't do it with the others (who were all girls), just when I was pregnant with my boy. It caused a lot of stress for me because I would question my husband. Wake up in the middle of the night and be sooo angry at him and let him hear all about what he did (which he never did - but it seemed sooo real) at 2 in the morning! It passed as soon as I had the baby! I think a lot of it could have been the hormones or possibly because I was so uncomfortable I couldn't get a deep rest so I would be in/out of sleep most of the night making my dream state happen more frequently and able to recall since I never fell soundly to sleep to forget it all. In addition, I was so tired all the time from the lack of quality sleep that I didn't get much exercise or should I say utilize much energy throughout the day. That only made falling to sleep much worse because even though I was tired, I had restless energy. My legs would twitch, I would have this anxious feeling, and just could not relax no matter how tired I was. My mind was always running... about things I needed to do, wanted to do, should have done... you name it! It will pass, in the meantime try to take it easy on your hubby. A lot is going on with you now. All those hormones are a big change for your body. They change as the pregnancy progresses so no matter where you are in the pregnancy something different is always going on. Have your hubby show you some more attention. It could be that you are feeling a little unappreciated. At child number 3 it's not as big of a deal as it was with number 1 (or even 2). It's kind of like you're an old pro at this point so sometimes men forget that we still need help and attention. And not just the sex part... a nice massage with no expections in return would be nice. A little bit of getting the door for you when you get into the car or go into a building ya know. You need to be showered right now... and if he did that your dreams may go away. Looking back on my own experience I think that may have played a big role in the way it went in our relationship because by the time we had our 4th it was like no big deal to him. Just another day... matter of fact, I still had to cook dinner, do the laundry, and all the other obligations a wife normally does with no extra help... because he knew I could do it. By number 4 (for us) he wasn't as ambitious to do anything he wouldn't normally do. Hang in there~ It will be over before you know it!

Amber - posted on 01/02/2010

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I used to dream about my husband dying horribly while I was pregnant. It got so bad that I spoke to my doctor about it. He assured me that it's because my hormones are going crazy and that it's completely normal. Just keep telling yourself that your poor body is in the middle of a roller coaster and that you can't trust anything it says right now. Hang in there, sweetie!

Emilia - posted on 01/02/2010

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I had four pregnancies and I didn't dream or daydream of it but I did have daytime nightmares about the children...



It's hormones and insecurity. Talk to your spouse openly. He should get the message that you are needing some reassuring. First pregnancy or 10th this does not change. Talk to your hubby. :o)

Maria - posted on 01/02/2010

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Unfortunately, yes! I went through the same thing in my first pregnancy, that I had to be reassured by my husband that he's not. Lol I don't know if it's just the hormones talking, but I personally believe that I felt uncomfortable with the way my physique was changing and it was affecting me emotionally. As if the pregnancy wasn't enough to make me emotional! I did talk to my gyne and she said the same thing, it was just natural to feel less composed, if you will, and it's manifested in dreams. Just share and talk it over with your husband, and let him know that you need his reassurances once in awhile in this time of need. Funny thing is, it went away with my second pregnancy!

Angelique - posted on 01/01/2010

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I had to laugh when I read this... I had the same dream last week. I dreamed I caught him in the shower with another woman! This is totally insane as he would never cheat on me and we are still as in love with each other as we were when we met almost 10 years ago... My remedy was to sneak in to the shower with him that same morning (after the dream)... Needless to say I was feeling much better afterward!

Cindy - posted on 12/18/2009

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I had bad dreams when I was pregnant with our son except I was always killing him in my dreams. In my dream he was always doing something I didnt like and would either run him over with the car or cut his head off. He was so glad when I gave birth b/c he said that he worried I would wake up in the middle of the night and start beating him or try something.

Lauren - posted on 12/07/2009

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I went through that, too, and a lot of it was just because I felt ugly and insecure. Don't do what I did and take it out on your husband. I used to wake up and yell at him and accuse him of sleeping with other women. None of it was true. I suggest you wake up and pretend cry if you have to and let your hubby comfort you! It's all in your head and I know that doesn't make it go away, but know that pregnancy makes you extra beautiful! I'm sure you've heard about that "pregnancy glow." We put off hormones that men are attracted to! Know that he is more attracted to you now and let him show you!

Janine - posted on 12/07/2009

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Good luck! I was fortunate enough (if you can call it that) to have had dreams of being with other men. Of course knowing that that was never going to happen it was easier to deal with. They say weird dreams are part of the whole pregnancy experience. Try to let it go, and not absorbing any of it! Good luck!

Tammy - posted on 12/04/2009

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Yes! I had dreams like this and so have several of my friends and family members when they were pregnant. I think it is one because of the hormones and two we aren't really feeling sexy and at our best when we are pregnant. Hang in there.

Venessa - posted on 12/04/2009

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I believe that we dream of the worst nightmares when we're pregnant because our hormones are all over the place. My SIL was pregnant a few months ago, I arrived in the house one day to visit her and she was crying as she dreamt her mammy had died. I just think all our irrational fears surface because being pregnant isn't bad enough!

Paige - posted on 12/04/2009

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Omg, i'm experiencing it right now! (Prego. with my first.) I've talked to my husband about these dreams, and even though he finds them pointless and silly, he still comforts me when I need it. It helps make me feel alot better. Maybe you could talk to him about it, not to try and provoke him or anything, but so he can comfort you. It might help.

Also, aparently your going to have crazy dreams like this. The two most common "crazy prego. dreams", are of cheating spouces/partners, and giving birth to animals. The last one is really wierd but aparently it's true, haha! So what you're going through is just normal. (I've read alot of books and had advice from my Dr. and family)

Hope I helped! And Good Luck! :) Feel better!

Christina - posted on 12/04/2009

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That would be hard to deal with while your hormones are already messed up... I hope you the best. Try to remember its only a dream and you are loved

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